I've had blind dates in the past. Ones that weren't that bad and others that I have left in the restaurant because they were horrible. I did promise myself that I wouldn't go on another for a long time, and maybe I should have said never again.
My sister has been on me ever since I moved down here to meet this guy that she said was absolutely perfect for me. She said that he was great and looked like Elijah Wood. I probably should clarify at this point, that if my sister ever tells you that someone looks like someone famous, she is probably dead wrong. But to get her off my back I told her to set it up, and she did for yesterday.
Ok, so maybe I'm shallow and whatever, you can say it all cause I was saying it in my head. First off, I have no problems with Mandals, the sandals that men wear, when guys are hanging out or going shopping quick or whatever. But not on a date.
I was actually dressed up, my cowboy boots, my peasant green blouse and my hair for once looked good. He was dressed in ripped jeans, a striped polo (like the kind 4th and 5th graders wear) and flip flops. He lost points for that. Then, he doesn't look
anything like Elijah Wood. Maybe the blue eyes, but other then that, he wasn't that cute. So I notice this and am kinda mad at myself for even caring, cause you know, God looks at the heart.
So I am determined to be nice and whatever, to try and make a good thing out of this. He opened the door for me of his car, (he gained some points back there) but then we are driving for quite a bit of time, without him telling me where he is taking me. I then have to ask, and I find out that we are going to a very extremely casual steak house. Apparently my sister didn't listen to me the other week when I said I had been vegetarian for nearly 5 months now. When we get there, he turns every sentence somehow that I say back to him. Then he tells me that I look nothing like my sister. Really? Thanks.
Since it is a steak house, I am taking my time trying to find something I can actually eat, and I don't want to go back on meat so my selection is limited to salad. When I order that, he looks at me, which is when I tell him I'm a vegetarian. Then he orders steak, and then comments again about my sister.
I believe it was about this time when a lady and her 2 boys came in, and he asks if I like kids. What the freak kind of question is that on the FIRST DATE? Our conversation is halted and stilted, and about this time I realize that it is me asking most of the questions, so I stop asking to see if he tries to take the conversational ball from me. He doesn't and so we continue in silence, which is fine for me, mainly because whenever he answered a question that I asked, he would look over my right shoulder, which made me feel like he was talking either to someone or his invisible friend. Kinda weird.
After dinner he suggested miniature golf, which makes some points but at this moment I wonder what my sister was thinking. We go ahead and do mini golf, but we have lost nearly all of our conversation, until it's time to come back home and then we start talking about random shallow stuff. Both of us agree that we will not be more then friends and it might be cool to go out with a group.
On a scale of 1-10, (10 being the best) I would personally have to give him a 2. I did like the original move of golf, but wearing sandals, going uber-casual dining, and loss of talking skills kept demoting him.
I do realize that I was kinda shallow about his looks, but that old saying about women knowing within the first 10 minutes if the guys have a future with them is very true. And for that date I wasted my cuteness. Go figure.
What kind of blind date experiences have you had?
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Comments (26)
I think I'd be too scared to go on a blind date lol. I'd prefer befriending the guy first... or at least knowing him than randomly going out with some dude.
i went for 3 blind dates:
1) bad experience
2) bad experience
3) the very best experience in my life. it was 4 years back, we continued dating and we are actually still together now.he's a gift from God. :)
First of all, first impressions are way over rated. Esp. if you're like most people and actually cannot judge a person's psychology with so little to go on. Unless there are some obvious flaws that come from the core of the person's character. I guarantee you that a man who's absolutely clueless about impressing women is 10000 times as likely to be good for you as someone who does everything perfect. The former being possibly overly nervous or self conscious (internally), the latter being a professional player or overly self conscious (externally).
It's not to say he is (or isn't) ready for a relationship as is. Not all poorly dressed people are slobs. Some simply care more about character and find that as a way to repel shallow people. And if a man is good enough to not care about getting into bed too soon, there are some that really want women to look deep early on or walk away if you don't or don't care to. Of course they tend to be single practically forever. But philanderers know how to sweeten manure (themselves) and they get away with it quite often. Is that fair?
I shudder at the thought...
I have yet to have a good experience to speak of. One dude left to go find "lotion" for his forehead because it felt dry. WTF?
WTF is wrong with mandals
be a man and get a real date for fuck sake
None, and after that experience I think I'm grateful not to have been on any blind dates ever.
no blind dates, being setup is the worst feeling ever... i don't know how those that are in an arranged marriage do it, isn't that way worst? :P
@ScorpioInBlack@xanga - hahahahaha funny!! really?
Nobody can be blamed just because you didn't find your date cute - these things are so opinionated. But actually I won't mind a casual outing as a first date - I can't do stiff, dressed up first dates - and you were wearing cowboy boots, that's not that dressed up! Better luck next time :)
@GaMeGurLsH@xanga - Yah, he disappeared for a while. I was on the verge of making a dash for it, but I stayed out of curiosity of what else is wrong with him. I thought, what the heck...it'll always be a humorous story to tell. Sad, but funny.
hahaha....good stuff...maybe he wanted to show his realself, i mean i don't think you'll dress up that nicely all the time:P
Hm,.. sometimes there's a reason why some people need to be set up on blind dates. Exhibit #1: This guy that you just spoke of. lol
I've never been on a blind date, but even the guys that asked me out dressed nicely. Dress shoes, dark jeans or dress pants, and a fitting polo or striped shirt.
Blind dates.. don't do it.
Well, after some thought, I realized I'd wear the best of what I have, according to the place of the date. But just as a gesture to avoid embarrassing her there. If we agree to meet again, but more casually, I'd not dress up.
Aside from appearance, though I find most women good looking enough, the only quirks I can't get around are the cold ones:
1) Drawing conclusions based on superficial reasoning. (ex. 1. He doesn't pay attention to fashion, so he won't pay attention to me. 2. He's a perfect gentleman, he is definitely a nice man. 3. He never smiles, or always looks upset, so he's definitely a creep.)
2) Unnecessary cruelty. (examples 1.Laughing at someone who isn't joking/clowning, unless you already know that person to go along with it. 2. Threaten someone who isn't a threat. 3. Scold someone for small mistakes.)
There is more, but I am too tired to go on right now, and I think you get the idea.
oh god, that sucks.
and by mandals you don't mean flipflops like rainbows? because rainbows are the staple shoe diet of california. lol.
but idk. bleh, blind dates are always pretty hard to go by. i prefer working relationships from already established friendships. because you get to know them in casual settings and their personality should shine out best when you guys are both comfortable with each other. :)
Maybe he was nervous? Although, I do think he should've (since it was a blind date) had a few places he was planning to go with you (just in case) and talk to you about it when he saw you. Or, better yet, maybe he should've discussed the actual specifics of where you were going and what to wear and things like that with your sister and have her relay the information.
Although, since she apparently thought it was okay for him to take a vegetarian to a steak house....
I'm sorry for the very awkward experience, I'm sure from the sound of it that it was awkward for him, too. Which is why I speculate that maybe he was nervous. That, and looking at a point over your shoulder kind of reminds me a little bit of a trick I learned in school when I had to give an oral report of some kind. Although, that trick involved looking straight ahead at a point above the heads of the audience, but still low enough that you didn't look like you were looking at a picture, a poster or the ceiling. :p Not over the shoulder.
But, still. Considering it was just you he would've had any reason to be nervous about, and not an entire room of people (since he wasn't on a date with the other customers! :p ) I guess staring at a point beyond the right shoulder could work? :/
Some guys just don't seem to think it's necessary, anymore, to take girls somewhere nice-nice, rather than casual, on the first date.
Maybe he was just a little socially inept? I dunno. But, I guess from now on you won't be going on anymore blind dates set up by your sister? :p
I'll take the occasional blind dates. It's curiosity that drives me to do that. Sure, blind date has its risks and a high ratio of disappointments, but who knows you'll end up with a gem of a date?
I'd never go on a blind date.. I'd be so awkward..
@Fluxuater@xanga - Don't be too harsh on yourself, I'm sure nobody knows what to expect on a blind date. It would be awkward for probably most people.
I don't do blind dates. I tend to scare people who know me off rather quickly. Blind date would be a disaster. Also when someone says "Oh, he looks just like Elijah Wood" in my head it immediately translates into: "He looks like a hobbit." Never a good thing.
You know, on a blind date, unless it was mutually agreed not to many people "dress" up. you're meeting someone on the recommendation of someone else, that is nerve wrecking as it is, without fidgetting about what we're wearing. Women want to make the best impression they can possibly make. Men just want to get to know the girl.
I think your date was flawed because I think he was expecting you to look like your sister. Perhaps he thinks your sister is attractive and imagined you to resemble her in some way. And clearly your sister does not know you or understand the type of person YOU are, nevermind the person YOU'd likely to date.
I've done blind dates; often my height requirements intimidates men (among my other qualities), and I usually take it as an entertainment for the night. They never work out anyways, no matter how close my match makers are, they don't know what I like, only I do. As shallow as it is, it really takes the first FIVE minutes. You know it in your skin don't you? the moment their eyes meet yours and you finally smile, either you're nervous or giddy, even if the conversation starts slow, you know you're attracted to that person enough to tolerate the awkwardness. if you're not attracted to that person, the rest of the minutes left in the hour is painfully slow. Heck, now you can tell your sister to SHOVE it
@kor_girl@xanga - I agree with you completely. But you have to be esp. careful when someone makes you giddy that quickly. That's why you need to drag it out (any relationship) until it either falls apart or until you prove to each other that from that point there is no one else for you.
i don't do blind dates because i AM too shallow to be able to get over someone "unattractive". usually because i will have built him up in my head. i'd rather go "window shopping" and find a cute guy that way.
it's true personality matters, but if there isn't an initial attraction, how can you even find the personality underneath? it's a double-edged sword.
but i want a guy that my friends agree is attractive. i kind of like knowing that other girls are checking out my guy because hey, look all you want ladies, he's coming home with me. yeah, i'm shallow. but i do take the time to get to the good stuff underneath. but i do want both. yeah.