I grew up in a family where in my younger years, my dad yelled a lot. It sent all of us kids to find our favorite hiding spots and generally keep our heads down. What did he really want? Did my dad feel more loved? More respected when he yelled at us? Did us running away give my dad what he desired? Did yelling give him what he wanted?
Now I live with (well, technically) two other people, but we might as well be honest and say there are four other people living here other than me. My two roommates are both in relationships. My male roommate is a quiet, caring, others-oriented kind of guy. He gets yelled at by his girlfriend all the time. She is constantly screaming at him that he doesn't love her (when from the outside looking, I've got no clue how she comes to that conclusion).
Things usually go downhill from there very quickly. In the three months, I have lived here, I've seen and heard more one-sided verbal knockdown, dragged out fights than the rest of my life combined....
Why do people do this? My other roommate does the same thing to her boyfriend. Neither of these two guys is a jerk, cheats or is a bad boyfriend...shoot, most would say they would trade anything for guys like them... so why do these ladies yell at them all the time?
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Comments (42)
We always find something to nag/scream about.
Whether it's a valid issue varies from situation to situation.
My boyfriend seems really really sweet and caring to everyone, but no one knows some of the randomly slightly douchey things he does.
It's easier to take things out on people you love. Cause they will usually take your shit. Since there's love there, they'll stick around.
I ask my boyfriend why he puts up with me all the time -.-
I wouldn't know how a girl thinks (since I'm a guy), but sometimes I get stuck in that situation. I don't really get yelled at, but I get the cold shoulder and when I try to fix it, she'll tell me not to touch her.
Perhaps it might be the idea of assertion that the girl is always right? I don't know. But, what I do know is that I would be sick of it after a certain while. Maybe the guy has to speak up sooner or later to show her that he's not a doormat to be walked all over. Sure, it might break the relationship, but honestly, being constantly yelled at for doing nothing wrong is a little bit much and both sides need to put their foot down when it needs to be.
Well. They just sound like crazy bitches to me.
also, people don't really know everything about someone else's relationship. while the guys may seem nice to you, they could have their negative moments which you don't see. everyone sees my bf as a super nice guy, but i'm the only one who sees how much of an asshole he can be if hes mad or something. so you never know.
@C0ll33Ncorps@xanga - i agree..
you do not have to be always yelling or screaming at one another; it's so pointless and annoying. i wouldn't be able to put up with that if it were to happen to me.
@C0ll33Ncorps@xanga - yeah. agreed.
Why anyone would put up with that is beyond me. Once you get to a certain age, you learn not to throw temper tantrums and converse like adults. Sorry, but these girls sounds crazy and immature to me. Since when did yelling at someone solve anything.. And if they're so intent on making a point that their boyfriend doesn't love them, why are they with them?!?!
Man, girls can be psychotic sometimes. My boyfriend would be GONE-ZO if i tried to pull some childish shit like that.
Minus the screaming, I feel like...this could be applied to me.
Anyway, people do such things probably because they don't know what they have...or something.
One thing I dont deal with is screaming. There's no need or it. I can ignore hitting(especially if its provoked), I can even combat snarky comments to the point where even if im wrong you'll feel like a giant idiot... but when it comes to screaming I'll just get up and leave. Scream at yourself on your own time.
When you hear me mutter "watch that tone" thats the warning. When you hear me say through my teeth "who the fuck do you think you're talking to?" dont answer, just shut the fuck up and let it boil over.
Whats worse is when couples yell and scream and argue in public.
use your indoor voices
Nothin' like being verbally abusive to your SO. That always makes for a great relationship....
Aw, this is exactly the kind of thing I hope not to encounter. I used to be a rough-and-tumble kind of girl when it came to guys and I completely regret it. Now I try to be sweet and bring them little gifts and such. It's affection but shown in a nicer way.
............ maybe they were abused so now they abuse other ppl? idk man. they sound like a couple of psychos. better leave before you start getting on their nerves/turning into them.
They sound abusive. The way you wrote about them they come across as total bitches. But then again, if they like putting up with that then more power to them. /shrug.
it means they're insecure.
they desire love and attention but really don't think they deserve it; hence the paranoia about the 'lack' of love between the SOs and them. they're acting in a self-destructive and self-fulfilled predictive manner. they don't believe they're worthy of love and their SOs will dump them; they get so freaked about it that their SOs will probably soon dump them.
you should check out their hand-writing. see if either one of them writes their hanger letters (y, g, etc.) with the bottom half curving out. if you find some, get the person to therapy. not kidding.
yeah, they just sound bitchy.
Paranoid, maybe?
I guess I kinda am the same to guys that like me... I try to scare them off with my temper tantrums, in hopes that they'll stop liking me. I kinda feel bad, so I stopped doing that.
Just as there are male abusers, there are also female abusers.
my mom yelled at my dad all the time...although sometime I think he deserved it
I guess the thing here is we don't know how good we've got it until it's gone, at least that's what I'm picking up from all of this. Of course they could just be that insecure about themselves as well.
Girls are cunts. End of story. Tell those two girls to smoke some weed and chill the fuck out.
It's because the guys aren't douches. If they were, those girls would know better than to bitch and moan all the time. That is for another blog, I suppose. Basically, humans are strange. We're horrible to the ones who love us and cling on so desperately to the ones who don't.
because they're great, and they've gotten used to seeing the so-called "perfect" in them, and now they expect more. its human nature. you never want anything LESS than what you have, only MORE. :P
They sound insecure. They're verbally abusing the guys. In other words, I second the "they sound like crazy bitches" thing.