Fmylife.com contains short day-to-day life anecdotes. A simple recipe: in one sentence, each site visitor can tell the shitty moment which ruined his day. These short stories must begin with "Today" and end with "FML".
Here are our favorite five submissions from
F*** My Life this week:
Today, I was having sex with a girl. She was really into it and not holding back on the noise...That is, until I received a text message from my little sister next door reading "If she is making that much noise, she is probably faking it...Trust me, I know." FMLToday, I went with my fiance to meet his parents. He was really sweet the whole way there, and once we got there he introduced me as 'the girl I'm going to marry'. His parents took one look at me and said, "Are you sure?" I laughed, because I thought they were joking. They weren't. FMLToday, I was sitting on the bus next to a hot guy who was texting. I sneaked a peek at his phone to see if he was texting a girl so I could know if he was single. As I looked at his screen, he turned it towards me and typed in caps "STOP BEING A CREEPER." He got out of his seat and off the bus. FMLToday, I got engaged to my boyfriend of three years. I made the announcement on my status on facebook so people would congratulate me. The only response I got about my engagement was from a girl I knew saying; "Umm, he didn't tell you he was cheating on you for three years with me?" FMLToday, after a great night of sexual pleasure, I ran to answer the door. The angry woman standing there introduced herself. ''Hi, I'm your neighbor. My seven year old son's bedroom is just next to yours and when you scream at night he gets scared. Do you think you could keep it down?'' FMLhave you ever had anyone hear you and tell you to keep it down?
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Comments (20)
ha i love fmylife i get it on my phone...good stuff
I think these things are stupid. What's the big deal about this site anyway? And what place does this have on Datingish? Yeah, you pick out the ones about relationships. Big whoop.
And since when does being really loud mean a girl is faking it?
I got told to be quiet by my SO so his dad wouldnt hear >.<
HAHAH. These are always so funny.
LOL goooood stuff.
Last one is the best!
there was a couple that was doing it in rez and i really wanted to tell them to keep it down but I didn't =(
haha :)
Hahaha funny. I haven't been told to be quiet. I haven't had sex. FML?
lmfao at the first one. thats is fml material in so many ways :]
ouch @ the fourth one.
xo
LOLOL.
No, but my land lord (on the first floor) congratulated me on the fact that his mirror moved the night before. (I live on the third floor, and I guess my SO and I kept it up a such a pace that the wall sent vibrations down to my landlords mirror???)
There's the banana again!
i've never been told, but at my old apartment, i could hear my neighbor below me loud and clear, almost every night. a few days after that, i found out that the girl was a girl was my teammate in high school for cross country and track. awkward.
LMFAOOO . sad
No, but once we had to tell our ex-neighbors to keep it down, she was being too wilded.
I get this site on my phone... updates daily and this has got to be one of my favorites "Today, I was having sex with a girl.
She was really into it and not holding back on the noise...That is,
until I received a text message from my little sister next door reading
"If she is making that much noise, she is probably faking it...Trust
me, I know." FML" ...
lol datingish made me download the fml for iphone/itouch hahaha
first one is the funniest!!!
LMFAOOOOOO