Wednesday, 05 August 2009
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Loving Her When No One Else Will
I know it sounds cliche, obvious, what have you, but one of the greatest things you can do for a woman is loving her when no one else will.Lately, my girlfriend has been having family problems. Without going into detail, it's really made her feel like a dog the way they've been treating her. With the influence her parents have on the rest of her family, they don't come to her aid when she needs it the most. And so, in the theme of things, I've been literally the only person that's been there for her through this whole fiasco.
If there is one thing I've learned from this situation, it's this: love your girl when no one else will, but most important is love her no matter what. Whether or not you're fighting, whether or not things have been rough between you, whether or not you're not a guy that likes to show his emotions, love her.
It's important that you show her how much you love her as often and as ornately as possible. Make sure she knows that, even though she may not be in encouraging company at home that she's always welcome at your place. My girlfriend has a hard time allowing people to do stuff for her, so I make sure I do stuff for her anyway. Make sure she knows that she's not putting you out at all, and most importantly, mean it. Girls always have a way of finding out if you're not sincere, and with good reason.
This is just a little advice from a fellow man who's girl is going through a tough time right now. Whether or not your friends want to hang out, be there for her. If she needs a phone call at 2 am to reassure her that she's on your mind, do it. If she needs her hand held, whether or not you're "down" with the whole PDA thing, do it. When no one else will love her, make sure you love her enough for everyone.
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About the Author
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- From: harmonyminusmelody@xanga
- Name: Evan
- About Me: in reference to my username, i have been since acquainted with my melody and we shout to the heavens our concordant song of life and love. i am a lover, a God-fearer, a space enthusiast, an aerospace engineer in-training, a writer, a gamer. i am lazy, opinionated, overweight, overbearing, and full of myself, but honestly, WHO ISN'T?!? at least i can say i'm not full of YOURSELF.
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Comments (58)
Thank you for posting this.
Your girlfriend is very lucky.
Lovely advice.
You're awesome.
Chicks dig this. Besides -- EVERYONE just wants to be loved for who he/she is!
An "love regardless" type of thing (concept?) but why do I feel some pity in this as well?
Great advice! Props! This is really something to take to heart.
i think that's lovely. the only thing that would concern me is making her too emotionally dependent on you; you're a boyfriend, not a crutch. but it's wonderful to see how much you care.
Right, we should show love for them unconditionally. I agree wholeheartedly with that, but did twinge a bit at "ornate". We dont need to try to prove to them we love them. I think that would indicate some sort of insecurity on their party, but yeah.
Beautiful advice. ^_^
wow, so true, I wish every guy thought like you!
@nyclegodesi24@xanga - by ornately, i meant maybe make her a goofy picture or a mix cd or maybe leave a note on her car when she's at work. i don't mean it to prove your love by it, i simply meant to be creative and maybe do stuff that you wouldn't normally do.
for example, i made her a comic book for christmas :P it was of the big events of our relationship thus far. now, i can't draw, color, anything like that, but i did because it was unique, creative, and i knew she'd love it.
now, i'm not sayin' draw her up a comic book when she's feelin' a bit down. just that being creative and/or goofy always heals wounds and lightens the tension.
@naguyin@xanga - there's definitely no pity. i go through my share of family problems, thus i know what she's going through. it's hard to pull your weight through a dilemma when no one's there for you, and she was there for me through my family problems as well.
@MissPixieGlitter@xanga - my girlfriend is very independent. when she's having problems with me, for instance, her family is there for her and her friends are too. i can definitely say she is in NO way dependent on me for her emotional well-being :P but i am always there for her, whether she wants it or not.
@harmonyminusmelody@xanga - ohh okay, sorry for the misunderstanding then. i think creative (and simple) ways to show your affection are really nice.
@harmonyminusmelody@xanga - You could say that but I feel that there is always a little pity in everything, mostly in "love". Then again, I also think the issue is that we don't have the same views to concepts such as this (I just like to see the negatives in everything).
I love this article! Thank you so much for submitting it because I know I have a guy that loves me when nobody else does and it really helps when you have depression.
Aw...
swweet
oh man... lucky u r not around my gf, hahaha, jk, i do the same, i keep it real, truthful, considerate and consistent
props to u man
wow, you are truly amazing, your girlfriend is so luckky, ive been going through a tough time recently and all my boyfriend can say is you need some time alone, to think things out, when really having someone beside me would feel way better. props on this advice, its beautiful.
Awww....that's lovely. Your gf will get through the tough times, especially with such a caring and loving bf like you.
my fiancee loves me at all times. Even if we are fighting he still tells me that he loves and will continue to love me even after we apologize to each other. I have had family problems as well right now and my fiancee is there for me at all times. I think that is how I know he is the one. You are a great guy.
k
greatly said :)
This was beautiful. My past two boyfriends have both done this - with my ex still remaining a factor in my life to help me and my current boyfriend doing whatever he can to love me, even if I tell him to go away.
I commend you on this. Your girlfriend is a lucky girl.
Great post. you sound like a great person and your gf is very lucky to have u =)