Miss Walrus
Last week, as I'm laying out at the pool with my three best girl friends sipping a Bud Light & looking over my new issue of NYLON, a weird little feeling came over me:
I want to be single.
Right now, the lines in my current relationship are a little blurred, due to the fact that it's summer & in a measly two weeks I will live three hours away from the dude I've been hanging out with lately (read: the boy who has attended any summer festivals, concerts & poolside BBQ's with me all summer).
Now, for most girls, this might seem normal. Of course it feels amazing to get to hang out with girl friends, gossip & make exciting plans for the future (complete with delicious mixed drinks). However, in high school & my early college years, spending time with my cherished girlfriends never really seemed to be enough. I always felt this undying need for something
else; a boy to call before I went to bed, someone to go see the latest scary movie with me, etc. etc.
I definitely viewed being single as more of a curse than a blessing.
But now, the prospect of being single actually
excites me.
What about you? Why do you want want to be single? What are your favorite "single" things? There are some obvious perks, even if your coupled-up friends are in denial of them.
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Comments (73)
i liked being single too!
of course i love my bf now, but i'm not knocking the single life. both areas of life have their pros and cons and lessons, but i think it was definately good for me to have been single as long as i was. i like me!
I've had that feeling and it is pretty weird.
I'm in a relationship that I love but sometimes I feel like I need to be alone. Ever since high school I've always been in a relationship so that could be why I feel the NEED to be alone.
Some of the perks of being single are you can flirt with whoever you want, you only have to worry about yourself and you can really figure yourself out as a person.
I've never had some of those perks. I feel like I know who I am but I still define my self worth on whether I'm dating or is someone likes me. I'm tired of worrying about what someone else is going to think. It's exhausting but I'm glad I have a bf now that is more relaxed and trusting and I really can carry on with life like I am single (with the obvious limits).
I'm not single now but being single in the beginning of the year was really exciting! You can hang out with your friends whenever you want without having to schedule weekly hangouts with your bf or gf. It's also really fun to meet new guys/girls that interest you, even more so when you don't plan it. Since I'm friends with mostly guys, I thought being single was fun because ever since I've had a boyfriend I feel like my guy friends don't want to hang out that often anymore. But being in a relationship is great too : )
@MilkyWhitesezMoo@xanga - agreed!
One of the great perks about being single is that you can hang out with pretty much anyone you want, at any time. When I had a boyfriend, over half of my friends were in relationships and I always felt really bad about when groups of us hung out and the single people were, well, "singled" out. I agree that it's easier to hang out and keep in touch with guy friends now, too. I'm actually not too thrilled about the "perks" of being able to date around or flirt, because ever since I've been single and pursued by a few guys, I'm not interested (A, because I'm very picky. And B, because I'm pretty freaked out and just not interested in dating and relationships right now.). So then I just feel guilty and awkward about getting around to the "thanks, I'm really flattered but not interested" talk.
i guess the good thing about it is, that you get to flirt and have fun, and not have to worry about the other person getting mad. But I think I'm happy with the person I'm seeing currently, so I'm fine with being single or taken
Good for you!
Personally, I think being single is nice because it gives you more spare time. Though, being in a relationship can be really nice too.
I just got out of a very long relationship and in the last year of that relationship, I desperately wanted to be single. I had a lot of single girlfriends, so their love lives always seemed more interesting than mine.
After I broke up with with my ex, I wanted to date but I didn't actually date that much. I thought that I would rather do the single scene longer, but I've been dating a new boy for two weeks now, and I've got a feeling that it's going to be another long term relationship, which I am surprisingly excited about.
I think my wanting to be single means that I no longer want to be with the person that I am with. I don't think I ever really want to be single for that long. I'm pretty much what you would call a serial monogamist >.<
I feeeeeel free. And, I don't really know, but being single keeps me more happy and independent. Being in a relationship, most of the times I feel like I have a lack of space... which leads to a breakup almost every time,lol.
i'm in the same boat as you. i don't know... i think i've been in the relationship way too long to be excited about near singlehood. but i know that after i adjust to my new lifestyle, it'll be a sad day for the relationship when i realize i don't need the guy anymore and do just fine.. =\
yeah.. but it's a nice change to have some time to focus on yourself rather than discovering more about another person. we'll see.
If I am in a happy relationship I wouldn't want to be single. Last spring I broke up with my first gf, I've been single for awhile. It was odd adjusting to being single again.. but I've done a lot since then. Now I pretty much am fine either way. No real hurry to find a girl, but if she comes I'll be there!
I have been in a relationship with my boyfriend for a little over 3 years now. We've been living together for a little over a year, and its just starting to get to me.. I love him and want to be with him, but I can't help but feel that I want to be on my own. Its hard having to constantly think about another persons feelings, and I guess sometimes we all just need some time to focus on ourselves.
Being single is funnn and it definitely takes a girl who isn't emotionally needy to enjoy being single.
Flirting, maybe kissing a couple guys, teasing...no need to hold back.
me too =)
I kinda miss it. But I can still do single thing every once in a while.. 'cept someone's always worried about me.
My friend just got out of a relationship and she's so excited about it.. I'm glad. She's happier now than in a relationship!
Im not a fan of being single, but when I was single, I made due with starting a weekly "girls night". we would all pitch in 5 bucks and (Rent a movie, go out and buy junkfood from the grocery store, do wine tastings, try and start impossible hobbies (mine was sewing)...all sorts of stuff) But now all my buddies went back to thier designated colleges - so... yea.
Exactly, me as well. Singles want someone to complete them. I am complete, i would want someone who compliments my completeness (not literally). I'm just very independent and i'm at my best when i'm single. Nothing against relationships, i'm not going to be with a boy until i find one that makes me not want to be single, not one because i want/need a relationship. I rather wait than waste my time.
...what's wrong with wanting to be single?
I don't think there's anything wrong with wanting to be single. But who knows, everyone is different and at varying stages in life people think/ feel differently.
It's situational.
Dude yeah. I love being single.
The thought of being a in a relationship just seems stifling to me right now.
i wouldn't mind being single atm. now i can focus on myself, on my goals, soon to be career and what not. :)
but it is nice to have someone.. :$
I like being single until I meet someone who can sweep me off my feet, at which point it's very hard for me to enjoy being single for awhile after it ends. It takes a lot for me to find someone who makes me want to commit. Some of what I like about being single... basically just being able to do what I want and not having any expectations of anyone but myself. I'm pretty idealistic, so when I'm with someone, I have certain expectations of how things should be, and when they aren't, I get a little frustrated (it's actually a flaw I'm working on). When I'm single, I couldn't care less... And I'm on my own schedule :)
I love being single. Actually, my problem is that I like women, but I hate relationships. Or maybe I hate women when I'm in a relationship with them. Either way, I think they're all cool and shit, but then I start a relationship and the neuroses just pile up. It's very tiring to be that responsible for someone's happiness besides my own. That said, I'll still probably get into a relationship when I meet a girl I like. I always fall into that same trap, hoping this girl will be different.
being single is cool, and something i mostly enjoy but lately i have been getting the urge to find a relationship.
what's cool about being single is not getting sick of a certain person and stepping back and thinking why am i with this person, lol.
Before I didn't like being single. I missed doing things couples do in relationships. I recently broke up with my last ex about 2-3 weeks ago... Now, I realized being single is fun, especially since I'm still in college and having the time of my life. =)