Miss Rhino
Would you rather be neurotically attached to your sexual partners or compulsively push them away?
On the one hand, you've got the stage 5 clinger.
You've slept with a person and immediately believe that he/she is your soul's perfect mate. He/she begins to consume your thoughts. Stalk him/her on Facebook, follow his/her Twitter, hack into his/her email and spend all night reading conversations with his/her mom in the hopes that your name will come up alongside the words "true" and "love". You want to spend every waking and sleeping and not-sleeping-but-should-be hour with this person. Over-eager and possessive, you are attached. This immediately frightens and bewilders the object of your affection, and he/she inevitably breaks things off. Heartbreak is constantly looming around every corner.
On the other hand, there's the runaway bride syndrome.
You've slept with a person and now it's time to run. Your neurosis sets in and the hard-to-get mentality reaches an extreme. He/she has had you now, but now he/she can't. It's better to have the person chasing after you than to be too easily accessible. Isn't it? Distance is your friend and clingy simply isn't part of your vocabulary. One-night-stands become your forte as the notches on your bedpost add up, but the number of relationships never seems to change.
You push him/her away to see if he/she pull back. But ultimately your non-committal attitude and affliction to dating norms has driven them away for good. In this case, heartbreak would be looming around every corner, if you had let yourself get close enough to feel it.
Which is the lesser of these two dating evils? I'm not sure there is one. But if you had to choose...
Would you rather become too attached too easily or keep your heart on lock-down and at a distance?
Comments (19)
Hmm I think attached. Some guys like it.
im too attached too easily. it would be a relieving change to experience the other extreme for once.
i dont go around putting notches in my bedpost! I've only had one serious relationship in my 19 years of life. it lasted almost a year, however i still did not feel "in love" & thats why i broke it off. perhaps it was because we were not meant to be, or maybe it is a sign that i am too distant & my heart is on lockdown. i really hope that i fall in love in my next relationship or soon thereafter- even if it ends in heartbreak- just so i can prove to myself that i am capable of romantic love : /
with that said, however, i sitll think i would rather be this way than an obsessive,clingly creep!
I get attach way too easily so I rather keep my heart on lock-down and at a distance.
@KookingEggs - Same here!
People who get freakishly needy and attached have worse images than people who don't attach too easily.
My heart's on lockdown and at a distance because I get attached too easily, if that makes sense. I tend to give my all in situations where I really come to care about someone, but because I've been in so many of those (and they haven't always ended particularly well), I tend to guard myself rather than rushing to let someone past my defenses. So I'm the Runaway Bride, but a less dramatic version of one.
lockdown. i wouldn't want to be one of those people, but i would absolutely hate to find myself being clingy.
I've always kept my heart at a distance from people. It became second nature to me throughout the vast majority of my schooling (K-12). Let's just say I was rather picked on and exiled from the rest of the people in my class. It became a defense mechanism. People never got to really know me. While keeping my heart at a distance is not good for me and those around me, I personally from experience could not risk wearing my heart on my sleeve and risking getting attached too easily and too quickly.
I cling too much. So the other choice would be a completely different experience. XP
lockdown..it's how I am now. I always wait for the guy to start missing me!
heart onlockdown and at a distance
Definintely need to learn to be distant. I'm clingy as it is and HATE IT!
i tend to keep my heart on lock-down and at a distance... when they get too close, i tend to push them away; maybe i'm a commitment phobic and then again, maybe i just don't fall for people that easily... or maybe i'm just not that into you.. i have yet to find someone who will make me melt...
being that im more on the attached side.. reading from the options and my experience.. the emotions of the attached are two manic and depressing for me.. i'd rather be on the runaway bride end.. there is a sense of freedom in that.. there is none on the other end.. except for the freedom to continuously dream of ur lovers.
i think im kinda like ElusiveSoul.
like the post says, ii know ive driven some of them away for good, but at the end of the day youre still hurting
what to make of it?
I think I fall under the "clingy" description, but not to THAT extreme XD
I don't think he's my soulmate but I do like spending time with my bf and I'm possesive sometimes ._.
I'm become attatched in a normal way, HOWEVER, I always push the guy away.
I get attached, but I should be distant. So I guess my heart is on lockdown to make sure I don't go overboard on the attaching.
Just take your time to determine if that person is the one you want to spend your life with, until then, don't get so intimate. BTW, if you can get that intimate with someone so early, the odds are slim to none that he's more emotionally developed than a 3 yo. Otherwise, he'll turn you off as politely as he can.