Thursday, 30 July 2009
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Is There Another Woman? Part II
First of all, I wanted to thank everyone for their responses to "Is There Another Woman?" - positive or negative. I wanted to address a few comments.@Wolvenchic@xanga well even if there isnt another woman, it sounds like he is just not that interested and likes the attention he gets from you.
I agree! Upon discussing the matter with my best friend, she reiterated that a guy that is interested in you will do whatever it takes to see you. He lives in Brooklyn and I live in Manhattan, which is not that far from each other. It seems like he enjoys the attention of flirting with someone via text message and I think he feeds off the fact that I'm a younger woman so interested in an older man.
@Covergirl_For_Sanity_Fair@xanga Government job? Did you see proof of that? Because that's a great way to get into a girl's pants, just FYI for guys lol
Funny you say that. I asked to see his ID because I did not believe he was 35 years old. He looked my age! So yes, his job is legit!
@buddy71@xanga it will be interesting what you will write after this weekend. i hope you do an update
Thank you! Your comment gave me the idea to do this! And so begins Part 2...
We still talk only via text message. I refuse to call him if he easily has my number and he can do the dialing himself. Our conversations are spread out through the week and heavily over the weekend about what's going on day by day. He seems very sweet and always wanting to know what I'm up to and how I am doing. He'll throw in sweet nothings of "I can't wait to see you beautiful. I promise we'll get together soon."
Soon? Really? Is that so? I have not seen this guy since July 4th now. So I held my breath and asked him about this weekend.
Me: Excited for your birthday? What are your plans?
Him: Hell yea! Going to Atlantic City!Okay. It seems to me like he is stringing me along. He knows I don't drive and I have no way of getting there besides mass transit. To me, it doesn't seem like we are going to be seeing each other this weekend when we aren't making any effort to coordinate plans. I held my breath again and asked him what he was doing this Thursday so we could get drinks. No response yet...
I feel very disillusioned and confused. It seems like he is somewhat interested, but makes no effort whatsoever to see me. I really want to see him again because we had such a great time. I feel like I am throwing myself at him now since he doesn't seem to reciprocate anything.
Should I wait to see what happens this weekend or just ignore his text messages for good?
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Comments (34)
just ignore his text messages for good.
xo
Ignore him completely. Not worth your time and effort.
You guys don't do ANYTHING but this texting chit-chat flirting? NOTHING else? WTF? Yeah I would say this isn't going to pan out to anything. What a freakin' weirdo.
I'm with the ones above me.
He doesn't care, why should you?
I think you should just stop talking to him.
ignore....then he will get curious as to where you are.
poo... that stinks. He seems like he's trying to get you to talk to him more. try not talking to him, and see if he'll start saying stuff, or hopefully asking you to meet with him or something. But if he doesn't, just stop contacting him. He just wants your attention.
forget him!
ignore AND delete his number. that way in case you're tempted to text him, even if it's just to say hello... you won't. sorry, and best of luck.
If it's making you so anguished, it's better to confront him and call him out on his teasing and/or go from there.
I think everyone else has said what I'm gonna say. The answer is simple. Just cut off communications with him. If I was him I would have seen you at least once a week if that's all i could manage due to my job. He's stringing you along so dump him! Not worth your time!
ignore. IF he wants you, he would move the mountains to see you.
IGNORE... don't waste your time on him.
*I'm putting myself in your shoes*....
I'll wait to see what happens this weekend since weekend is jz like tomorrow and since you've waited for so long and waiting for another day or so won't make much difference.
But I already know he ain't interested in meeting up with you. If he does meet up with you, it would be a MIRACLE. :))
lmaooo on the part when u said he seems intrested, ummm no he is not, he is intrested in seeing how long your going to keep this up. any female will start to get the hint that this guy is never going to meet up and he isnt intrested in u like u think he is. why dont u stop it already and stop wasting your time. U keep holding your breath your going to die because this man is going to keep you waiting and waiting. ugh GIVE UP ALREADY.
Ignoring text messages is better said than done. I have an ex who still texts me and I can text him back and tell him to leave me alone but it just opens a can of worms. And if I ignore the text then more text messages come. So I would just say....see how the weekend goes and then base that off your decision on what you want to do next.
ignore him girl!
u will meet a better one for sure.
don't play into his game! OMG! I didn't know females like you still
existed,no offense but your caring way too much for some guy that
you never really had a relationship with!!! Girls today don't do that
& they don't let boys fool them like they did in their gr,gr,gr,gr,great
grandma's day when the females had no choice but pretend to like
the males because society didn't give them the freedom they have
now.Let this funny boy go.
Sigh... I am sorry but he could care less about you. Stop texting him, stop obsessing about him - he is not interested. Let it go.
i side with majority. u should just move on. i may be hard as some people pointed out, but u should love yourself more than to wait over the phone. reminds me kind of like the movie "he's just not that in to you". if he was interested, he would go out of bounds to look for you. if he's not interested, u should not even ask if he wants to go chill cuz he has NO inside his head even before you ask your question. easy tip to move on: accept that he's not into you, absorb the fact that he's not into you, move on to the other fishies.
mOve on.
He's just not that into you.
But it doesn't matter what anyone on here says...you are still going to hold your breath. lol...sad really..
@BoStOnIaNMoMmY@xanga - LOL @---> "you're going to died.." LOL
Hmm, If i was in the position, i would ignore him. It does seem like he is just useing you for someone to chat with, and thats not what you want. If he isn't going to make the effort to see you, you shouldn't either. He might be used to women making all the effort, but unless you want to spend your time trying, like you have, to get together all the time, I'd say leave him.
Good luck, hope everything turns out well.
Don't hold your breath, and just keep doing what you usually do and start dating other guys too.
It sounds like he is testing the waters, he just wants to play and have fun and have a friendship first before anything serious.
Date around too and when you do meet a great guy that you have fun with, that makes time for you tell him in great detail all about it.
He'll come running back to you then you'll get to have him prove that he is serious about being in your life.
He hasn't said anything about being together so turn the tables on him and see where it goes from there.
If not then well atleast you'll have one more friend right?
I think you should ignore him for a little while, see if he continues to text you and above all else, Don't Be So Availiable. Next time he says, "Let's see eachother this weekend" and you know he doesn't mean it (or even if you think he does) just tell him you already have plans. You're going to a big party. You're old guy friend is in from out of town. You're going to a rave. Whatever. Just make him feel a little jealous and little neglected. It can go a long way with guys like that.
It sounds like either there really is another woman in his life or he IS really that busy. Â Both are possibilities. Â I mean I flirt with women all the time but in most cases I know nothing will come of it due to my work schedule. Your guy could be really busy and has no time to see you but then again if he REALLY cared and is into you I don't see why he can't make an effort to see you at least once every 2 weeks. Â I think seeing each other once a month is the bare minimum and if he can't even do that then something is up. Â Either he doesn't have time for you or there is someone else in the picture.