Today was just another day at the office. I came in with my scrubs ready to prepare for the patients ahead with their teeth cleanings, fillings and what-have-you. As I was taking this man's blood pressure he started flirting with me. (A 69 year old man, gross!) Prior to asking my age and where I lived he asked, "Are you married?" Obviously I replied no because I am not, but then he asked, "Then, does that mean you are single?" And again, obviously I replied "no, because I do have an amazing boyfriend."
Now, those questions did not puzzle me. There were quite simple, in fact, but his next question has had me thinking all day and has prompted me to write about it. "Well, if you are not married, how can you not be single?" Simply, because I have a boyfriend so I am neither single or married.
I quickly changed the subject to his high blood pressure and gave him diet tips to bring it down because having too high of blood pressure can be damaging to your teeth. In the midst of telling and writing down alternative diet options he asked me, "So do you cook like this all the time? Do you cook like this for you and something different for your boyfriend?" Frustrated, I answered his question by saying that we do not live together. I am only eighteen and my boyfriend is only nineteen!
"So that means you're single!" Insert annoyance here.
While thinking about this question all day, I came to this conclusion. Of course you can be not be married and not be single. Single means that one does not share his emotions, hopes, dreams, tears, with another; one is basically on his own in every aspect of his life concerning relationships that transcend the platonic level. Being with someone, be it a relationship, an engagement, or a marriage one has another to share his feelings, emotions, happiness, sadness, and ultimately love. Therefore, you are definitely not single.
I think we can all assume that this man was trying a little too hard, but what do you think. Can you not be married and not be single?
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Comments (48)
yes
of course
Legally, no. Otherwise, sure.
Fine. If I can't be legally taken, I am reserved. :P
Legally (which basically just means on paper) you are single. But in normal everyday life you can consider yourself taken.
@depp_and_meaningful@xanga - I LIKE that.
that's a stupid question in terms of social order, but like MangoWOW said, it's not legally married but who cares? just tell him you're underage. what about all the gay couples that aren't legally married?
Legally, if not married, you're single. Boyfriend/girlfriend/fiances sort of put you in this this-is-my-potential-marriage-partner-to-make-me-offically-not-single mode. So. That makes you unavailable.
But, in a non legal sense, you can be not single and not be married.
what a funny old guy. you're only single if you're not married when you have to fill out forms and they only give you certain options. although, i've noticed that recently they've started providing a choice that runs along the lines of "not married but living together" or something
According to your taxes, if you're not married or divorced, you're single.
In Spanish, you area technically called "soltero/a" if you are not married. Even if you're in a relationship or engaged, you're labeled "single".
@i_r_keiko@xanga - i was just about to say the same thing. "widowed" is in there somewhere, too.
as everyone else says: legally- you gotta be single or married or divorced!
But... I think if you have a SO, then you're not really single, because obviously he's in a different level than a friend, and he could be a potential. but I rather have them say something like " in a relationship" rather than single.. as in, currently occupied.
yes. just legal stuff only have the "single" "married" "divorced" or "widowed" options.
you should have just joked off.
xo
@depp_and_meaningful@xanga - i think i'm going to start saying that when people ask me.
By technicality if you aren't married then you are single, but I consider only those that are free to date whoever, whenever single, those not "dating" anyone particular person.
I do know lots of people who say they are single but in a relationship when asked that question just so everyone knows where they stand.
@depp_and_meaningful@xanga - well said.
Marriage is a legal binding of two people, which most people take more seriousley than just dating or say "boyfriend and girlfriend". But yes you can be unmarried and not single, after all what are the point of boyfriend and girlfriends or fiance? Just because you're not married dosnt mean you dont share the same feelings for another that a married couple would share. Its just when someones NOT married another might think they still have a chance, my daddy always said there are two things final in life, marriage and death .. lol
Yes.
sorry..but i have to side with the old creepy guy with the high blood pressure.........if you're not married.... you're single.
You're not single for social purposes, as in you're not available/looking. You're only single for legal purposes. If asked casually, I would say you are not single.
You are not single. That man is just old fashioned or something. That's crazy.
He was getting annoyed, because you have a boyfriend, and you were saying that you weren't single? Because that makes a lot of sense in this day and age.
I believe if you are devoted to someone romantically then you are not single. If not being married always makes you single then there wouldn't be premarital cheating!
Translate "married" as "you can't bone me" and "single" as "you CAN bone me." Now his conversation with you will make MUCH more sense.
@depp_and_meaningful@xanga - that was good. props to you for cleverness!! :D :D