On the brink of a fun-filled holiday weekend, I asked my boyfriend what he wanted to do when it came to celebrating the 4th of July. Naturally, we agreed on taking part in the fireworks and various festivities; however, when I asked him for his insight on all of the specific details, he drew a blank.
I don't know about you, but I am
always the one who makes the plans, pays attention to detail, and ensures that our night go relatively smoothly. Sure, I'm all about "going with the flow" to have a good time, but it was just last week that I thought to call ahead, only to find out that the restaurant was closed for the night. There are many other instances where we run into problems due to inadequate planning, therefore I make it a neurotic point to keep all of our plans in check.
Come on, I know one of you looks up the movie times and makes the dinner reservations. Is it you or your SO who makes the plans in your relationship?
Comments (54)
It's me mostly.
One of us will have an idea of what to do and whoever does follows through with it. As for movie times it's whoever has internet connection at the time. It's all mutual for us.
We constantly ask each other what to they want to do. For example:
"Are you hungry do you wanna get something to eat?"
"Yes i haven't eaten all day."
"Where do you wanna go?"
"I don't know anywhere is good I could eat anything."
"....."
;D
but we usually end up with a place sooner or later.
:P
I do. And I have to admit, it gets annoying sometimes when he doesn't put more effort. =/
I carefully, painstakingly, obsessively make plans and contingency plans and backup plans galore whenever we do something. My boyfriend enjoys taking all of those carefully made plans and demolishing them by doing something completely spontaneous. The majority of the time, he's very good at winging things so we still have a great time. For me, planning is more of a security blanket than anything actually practical.
Whoever is more comfortable in making the plans, makes the plans. Simple as that. Gawd - love is complificated enough without the little things etching away at you. If he ever steps up to help in the plans, kudos. If not, I wouldn't worry it.
My other half and I used to have me making all the plans. Down the line, he took up where I left off,when life was too busy for me.
Lately, we've each spoken up to ask, throw ideas in, then the one with the best plan, executes it.
Seriously: don't sweat it.
Usually me..He will tell me what he wants to do and I will actually plan it like details and all..I just let him plan out a day and it didnt turn out that bad..except he didnt plan enough time for dinner so we missed our movie..so we had to see a diff one..lol.
It's generally more a function of which person like attention to detail more. My current boyfriend is very detail-oriented, and so I'll tell him an idea, and he runs with it. In a couple of my old relationships, if I wanted to do anything, I was the one planning. So it really just depends on the different personalities involved.
My boyfriend is more about the details. I'm more about the general concept of going out somewhere.
It honestly depends though. I think I'm bipolar or something lol, I have days where I want to plan everything out and other times it's like ok lets just see where the road takes us.
He's 8.5 years older than me so I think in general he's more organized.
It's mostly my SO who does the planning, but we take turns depending if the activity is more for him or me. :P
We take turns planning dates and suggesting ideas - I don't think we've ever done the same thing twice, and it always ends up being more fun than we expected. Sometimes we randomly change plans and that makes it even better :)
Mostly me, I plan too much. But I always ask him is he's okay with the plan or if he has a better one.
He does.
I'm too lazy. ; )
It's usually me. Occasionally my boy will toss in some plan ideas, but his idea of a good day is playing World of Warcraft instead of enjoying a beautiful summer day outside. :(
My SO does. He is always surprising me with stuff so I can't take part. But when I can I surprise him and like on the 4th of July we both planned it out and surprised some of our friends and family. :)
Decisions to do things are discussed -we'll do what works for both us.
if i leave it to my bf, he'd just say "let's chill" or "play it by ear." But when I plan it, there are particular activities that are happening throughout the day; going to a magic show, watching a movie, eating at a certain restaurant, etc... But I've always been this way; almost in ALL my relationships, planning is my job because things actually HAPPEN when I plan things. lol.
the first two dates with my bf, i asked him out and i planned the evening. only during the 3rd he made plans to sweep me off my feet, so to speak... these days, we do just play it by ear. If we're tired, we chill. If it's sunny, we'll walk around and enjoy the sunshine, that sort of a thing. :)
Ha! I know exactly how you feel...I cringe everytime my bf asks me to go out and then he'll end up asking me "where to?" or "where do you plan to go now?" Duh? We sometimes end up arguing for that matter only! I always tell him that he's the guy, so he's supposed to be the one handling it-i mean not all of the time of course. Most of us girls definitely loves surprises. IMO its kinda romantic if your SO would make the preparations for your date or something-just to surprise you and just make you happy. Guys can be really sooo naive. *sigh*
It really depends on what we're doing. Usually he does the planning, and I'll check it basically and make sure it's kool. Although if we go to the cinema it's me that plans it. I'm usually the kind of person that likes to go with the flow and do whatever I feel like doing at the time.
Mostly me, he may say the location and I have to plan up the itinerary. But if we're just doing any regular hang out in our hometown then it's mainly me. *sigh.
def. me! I'm neurotic about that type of thing! Luckily my BF is good for me in that way, he mellows me out and I... well I've helped him to plan things more thorougly.
I do most of the planning.
He's 'busy' doing his study etc, he does have a hectic schedule at the hospital, so I just do it all myself.
The wedding 'plans' are coming along marvelously thanks to me :P lol.
I tend to make the plans. Sometimes she will say, can we do this? And I'll plan it, down to the very detail. My gf is very "go with the flow" and I'm very structured. I need a plan and am free to improvise if we both like the change. Yeah... that's where I do a lot of my leading of the relationship. Planning...
Hunter vs. gatherer, I believe. (Long story, some theory I have about the male/female role in prehistoric life still sticking into the modern age). If the woman is an excellent gatherer, then the man realizes all he has to do is hunt. Then again, a man who plans is a man who has things under control. And that is very attractive to a woman. So maybe planning is the man's job. At least in the early stages. Then it's up to both parties in the relationship to figure out what to do and where to go. Right now my boyfriend and I are too poor to do anything much, so we just try to be spontaneous. "Hey, let's go to the park!" "Okay, that sounds like fun!"
lol most the time its me..But the way I look at it is that he trusts me and thinks I'm fun....sometimes I do get overwhelmed so we will go to the movies at the last minuet and find out from there and if not we do something else!
Actually, it goes both ways for us. We're not actually bf/gf, we're just good friends who go out more than once a week to eat and study and/or go watch a movie. (the record was last week, seeing each other 5 times in a row in 7 days). We will each do both. Often times, we decide where we're going for dinner when we get in the car. It'll start off with "Thanks for dinner!" without even asking. Then "You pick where we're going -- you're the driver!" "Thanks for dessert!" So for us, it's pretty spontaneous, we just go where and when we feel like it.