Wednesday, 08 July 2009
-
What is A Gay Marriage?
If I marry Raimie...is it a gay marriage?
My friend Raimie and I have grown up together. Our families were sure we would one day marry. We love each other deeply, and we have lots of things in common. I’ve written about him before on Xanga. We have been together for all the big joys and tragedies of each other’s lives. Even after he slowly came to realize that he’s gay we still thought we would probably end up marrying one day. Neither of us was really interested in anyone else and we both had trouble imagining life with us not being together. Thinking that a marriage based on such a deep loving friendship had a better chance for the long haul than the ones we have seen based on sex. We even planned on using I.V.F. in order to have a family together.
Raimie now has a boyfriend and I met and I am dating a guy too. We are still very close to one another, though, and my rose a day arrives faithfully like clockwork, and he never has to look for home-baked bread either. I’m not sure what the future holds for either of us but I know we will always be very important to each other. Some friends and I were talking and we started to discuss some pretty interesting things. Here are some of the questions we came up with.1.) If Raimie and I were to actually marry would that be a gay marriage since he’s gay?
2.) If Raimie gets a sex change and I then marry the “female version” would that be a gay marriage?
3.) Is sex what makes a marriage a “true marriage” or is it love and commitment?
4.) If I were to marry another heterosexual woman just because we were close friends and wanted to raise children together with all the legal protections a marriage provides, even though neither of us is gay would that be a gay marriage?
5.) Is it right that I can legally marry a gay man but Raimie cannot?
6.) This last one is for Christians who believe homosexuality is a sin. Assuming homosexuality is a sin just like every other sin. Then why are homosexuals the only sinners forbidden to marry. In other words why is it OK for gluttons, liars, gossipers, drunkards, etc. to marry but not for homosexuals to marry?
-
recommend
- recs 4
-
share
-
email
- sent 0
Related Posts
Post a Comment
- Back to datingish's Datingish Site!
- Note: your comment will appear in datingish's local time zone: GMT -05:00 (Eastern Standard - US, Canada)
About the Author
-
- From: echois23@xanga
- Name: Echo
- About Me: Just trying to breathe today....
-
Premium
Stats: This Week All Time Posts: 0 1 Views: 0 1181 Comments: 0 49 View all posts by echois23@xanga
Comments (49)
Number 2, would probably be considered gay marriage since you would then be of the same sex and that is what most people understand as gay marriage.
Number 3, I am a firm believer that love and commitment is what makes a "true marriage" but most people only see the sex aspect.
Number 4, I'm sure some people would believe you two were gay anyway just because they couldn't handle the fact that two friends want to raise a family together.
Number 5, no, it isn't right
Number 6, I'm not a Christian. =)
I am baffled, those are all good questions that I dont have the answers to.....hmmmm, I will have to think on it?
For
1. I don't think so...
2. Probably by "law"
3. To me it's love and commitment
4. Probably by "law"
5. No.
6. I'm not able to answer this. Not a Christian...
it sounds like you have a wonderful friendship but i think a very integral part of a marriage is sexual attraction and intimacy with one another. i'm just wondering what the point of marrying someone would be if you know he'll never want to have sex with you because you both like guys. can't you just be great friends forever?
to answer your actual questions, i would say it's only considered gay marriage if two people of the same sex are marrying.
:)
I NEED HELP
can someone show me how to put up a profile picture?THANKYOUA gay marriage is when two people of the same gender or transexual gets married
1. No because gay marriage means sex marriage
2. If he becomes a she, then yes it's gay marriage (see above).
3. I can't believe I have to answer such a logical moral question, it has to be more than sex, it's love and commitment.
4. You girls would be the same sex so see #2.
5. I'm not going to get into the politics of same sex marriage and if it should be allowed or not.
6. Not a Christian but I would have to say other sinners could 'ask' for forgiveness from God and get forgiveness given that the sinner will not do it again...whereas a homosexual cannot ask for forgiveness and change themselves into heterosexual...but I'm not an expert in religion.
marrying your gay male best friend
that is like grace marrying jack from will & grace tv show. what if a straight female marries a bi-sexual male? what if a straight male wants to marry a gay hermaphrodite(both male and female gender)?
You're thinking too much. I'm sure you know what is consider a "gay" marriage and what is not. Don't be ridiculous.
1.) If Raimie and I were to actually marry would that be a gay marriage since he’s gay?
No, in fact, there are TONS of marriages in which women marry self-hating gay men. "Traditional" marriage is based on members of the opposite sex marrying each other. Since you're female and he's male, no.
2.) If Raimie gets a sex change and I then marry the “female version” would that be a gay marriage?
Yes, because if he got a sex change, that would legally make him a "female". If two females were to marry, that would technically be considered a "same-sex" marriage.
3.) Is sex what makes a marriage a “true marriage” or is it love and commitment?
In the old days, marriage used to be about passing down the family name and having offspring. However, the ways of marriage are changing and somehow people think it's about "love" and "commitment". Any marriage is a "true" marriage, as long as you both sign the papers.
4.) If
I were to marry another heterosexual woman just because we were close
friends and wanted to raise children together with all the legal
protections a marriage provides, even though neither of us is gay would
that be a gay marriage?
"Gay marriage" is just a different term that people use for "same-sex marriage". Technically, since you are marrying another female, yes, it would be a "same-sex marriage".
5.) Is it right that I can legally marry a gay man but Raimie cannot?
Personally, I think it's wrong to deprive ANYONE of who they choose to marry. Gay, straight, lesbian, or whatever.
6.) This
last one is for Christians who believe homosexuality is a sin. Assuming
homosexuality is a sin just like every other sin. Then why are
homosexuals the only sinners forbidden to marry. In other words why is
it OK for gluttons, liars, gossipers, drunkards, etc. to marry but not
for homosexuals to marry?
Screw them. They just like to pick and choose and justify their homophobia by quoting a phrase from a bronze-age book that's "supposedly" written by an invisible man in the clouds. The bible also says it's an abomination to eat shellfish, shave, and touching the skin of a dead pig. (Not a Christian)
-Kunoichi
1) No, by law it is not considered a gay marriage. Gay marriage by law is the marriage between two partners of the same sex.
2) I believe so. By law it would be gay marriage since you would be of the same gender.
3) What the hell is a "true marriage"? Back in the day people would marry based on material trade for the female's hand in marriage and not have a thing to do with love. Love was an ideal used later. You can have a true relationship without getting married, plenty of people do it, and you can have a marriage without any relationship at all. Durring war times guys would get married just so that the female could recieve a check every month and then when the war was over they would get divorced.
4) Yes, by law it is gay marriage seeing as you two women would be of the same sex.
5) In my opinion, no. No it isn't.
6) I'm not Christian. I'm Quaker. And I don't follow everything in my religion anyway.
@KrazeeKunoichi009@xanga - that was a great response.
@GaMeGurLsH@xanga - this is why i have a problem with #6 (i'm not a christian either). for the sake of argument, let's assume a god/multiple gods exist, "sins" exist, and that homosexuality is a "sin." a homosexual cannot just change his/her orientation. one can abstain from sex, but one can be gay or straight without ever having sex. homosexuality extends beyond gay sex, so if a homosexual abstains from sex, he/she is still a "sinner" for being gay. sex is controllable, but if a "sin" is out of one's control (like attraction, preference), can it still be called a "sin?"
Uh, just to answer #6:
Homosexual marriage is NOT forbidden. Homosexuality is, as a sin against God. And seeing marriage as a covenant before God, homosexual marriage is technically an oxymoron, because you cannot have a covenant before God whilst sinning against Him.
1. No, because you are female and he is male. You aren't a gay couple.
2. Yes, because you'd be female and female.
3. Of course not. Love and commitment make a marriage.
4. Yes, because you are female and female.
5. No, but that's my personal opinion. I'm not the law.
6. I suppose because Christian believe that homosexuality can't be forgiven since you'll keep living that "lifestyle." Technically, if you do sin and you are forgiven, you aren't suppose to do that sin again...but most people don't follow that line.
I feel like I just took a quiz. Lol. Will this be graded?
xo
@Lorelei - *Nods*
@follow_home@xanga - Exactly.
Can we leave the gay-right/wrong issue alone? That's not what's been asked for us to answer.
1. No, a gay marriage is between two members of the same sex.
2. It depends on how you view it. If Raimie does get a sex change, then some would view him as female while others view him as still male. But yes, if you view him as a female then it would be a gay marriage.
3. Love and commitment are the biggest factor of a marriage, but you should still want to be intimate, to share a part of your soul meant for only one other person.
4. Yes, it would be considered a gay marriage, even if neither of you is gay.
5. No, I do not believe it is right, in the American way.
6. As a Christian, I hope I can answer this in a good way. I honestly don't get why homosexuality is a sin. I believe if it is, God can judge, not I. If it is not, then whatever, it's fine with me. I still discourage it, because it is written about in the Bible, but in only two spots. If it's such a big deal, then I think Jesus would have mentioned it, and it would have be mentioned a lot more. I don't think drunkards or gluttons or any others of those you've metioned should marry. They cannot be complete in the marriage. They cannot give it their all. Homosexuality may be a sin, but I cannot easily say it is worse than other sins. One of those two mentions in the Bible does say that they, among others such as murderers, rapists, and suchnot, will not enter the gates of Heaven. But this was written by Paul, who also said women should wear head ccoverings, and men shouldn't cover their heads.
I wish I had a black-or-white answer on the gay stuff, but I don't and I'm sorry. I actually hope it isn't a sin, or at least one God can forgive enough to let the ones who follow Jesus into Heaven, like the "little" stuff.
You remind me of two people I know that have had very similar mentalities. I don't know if they still do, though.
I don't know about your other questions necessarily, however, I will answer the final one.
Gay marriage is considered a sin, yes. Gluttony, lying, gossiping, and being drunk are also considered sins. Why are these people allowed to marry? Because being married is not a sin. They are not "allowed" to do whatever the sin is. Their sin is not being married to someone of the same gender (although the sin in gay marriage is not necessarily the marriage itself - it's more the sex part that usually goes along with gay marriage - it is considered sexual immorality to be having sexual relations with someone of the same gender - NOTE: there are also OTHER ways to be "sexually immoral") it is whatever their sin is (gluttony, lying, etc.). Therefore, they can get married. The "punishment" for sin is not to "not be able to get married". The punishment of sin is death (eternal death, damnation in hell). I really hope that made sense...
All the above is not necessarily something I believe, but what I know based on observations of the church and the people in the church.
@pianokeysKTbug@xanga - God looks at ALL sin the same.
Murder holds the same weight as a "white lie" in His eyes.
There's no such thing as "little sin".
@MissPixieGlitter@xanga - Why, thank you, love. :D
@ashleyannaka@xanga - Wow...really? That sounds kind of scary. But, you believe in what you believe in. o_o
-Kunoichi
@Lorelei - But if you basically CAN'T have a same-sex marriage within the confines of Christianity...what's the point in fighting it in the legal sense? What does it do to you?
@KrazeeKunoichi009@xanga - Straight to the point. Great responsee.
Number six: Christians like to whine and be involved in pointless drama that really doesn't affect them, the end.
pretty hefty stuff you're thinking and writing about, guhl. took me a minute to realize you're female. if i'm wrong on that conclusion, let me know.
anyway.
1.) If Raimie and I were to actually marry would that be a gay marriage since he’s gay? why? .... would it be anything other than just marriage? i guess it would be a confusing marriage if anything.
2.) If Raimie gets a sex change and I then marry the “female version” would that be a gay marriage? hahah if raimie gets a sex change, then it'd be a trans-gender + gender marriage
3.) Is sex what makes a marriage a “true marriage” or is it love and commitment? no, sex doesn't make marriage a true marriage. but it does consummate it, typically/traditionally/historically. love and commitment alone don't make a marriage a true marriage either. then every dating relationship that is at least somewhat serious is a marriage, and that would put the concept of dating into chaos... and we'd see a fuckload of people having commitment crises--or rather, the idea of commitment would go gone. the purpose of dating is ultimate marriage, or something that looks a whole lot like marriage. and when you say that dating is essentially marriage.. then.. what is marriage? what is the purpose of dating? there's no point to either. and you could say that they're constructs. but then what does that make of our sexual instincts and desires? that there's no purpose to that either, that there's no point to that either? then what? evolution makes no sense, et cetera. it's all pointless--and that in itself, makes no sense.
4.) If
I were to marry another heterosexual woman just because we were close
friends and wanted to raise children together with all the legal
protections a marriage provides, even though neither of us is gay would
that be a gay marriage? haha that's taking advantage of the system; we'd see people getting married left and right and bridal showers and bachelor parties and simply the gesture and moment of a proposal/engagement, just wouldn't have the same significance as htey still hold now.. nor would the concept of true love or soulmates or anything romancy schancy... disney could go out of business and just be part of the books, and the commercial world would have a little crisis about how to produce melodrama that depended on certain ideas and behaviors about marriage and committed relationships
5.) Is it right that I can legally marry a gay man but Raimie cannot? we live in a post-postmodern world. if that's too whacko for you, we definitely live in a postmodern world which is something to come to grips with. einstein was a modern man, not a postmodern man; his idea was relativity. in the modern world, there is no right and wrong. in the postmodern world, there can be. and in the postpostmodern world, what do you think there is? in postmodern times, we would say "it's all greek to me" and mean that "that makes no sense". but we see that we're actually making a roundabout trip to return to greek ideals and a greek kind of living. my answer goes to say, that being politically correct is something your question is asking for. but being politically correct 100% is never ever possible. so what's the point of the question other than spark something with sparks?
6.) This
last one is for Christians who believe homosexuality is a sin. Assuming
homosexuality is a sin just like every other sin. Then why are
homosexuals the only sinners forbidden to marry. In other words why is
it OK for gluttons, liars, gossipers, drunkards, etc. to marry but not
for homosexuals to marry?
paul addresses that in the new testament; he wrote more than half the new testament. he said that the issue of sexual sin is that it takes place WITHIN your body physically, whereas the others are not within your body and your body physically taking part simultaneously.. sexual sin is one that you competely lose yourself in, and your senses are in transit. being sexual in itself has little to nothing to do with getting married, just like how being a liar or a gossiper or a happy drinker has nothing to do with getting married. getting married, however , has historically been consummated by sex. it hasn't historically been consummated by telling a lie, or gossiping about a heighbor, or having a swig of ale. that's why the bible addresses marriage and sexuality together. when you try taking pieces of it apart and back together as you please, of course it won't make sense. the bible is actually very logical.