Wednesday, 08 July 2009
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The Problem with Sending Pictures
The other day I talked about the photos I used to take for a certain special someone. I sent him those pictures because it was a way for us to be together, even though we were far apart. I trusted him completely, and besides, he was always very possessive of both me and the pictures, so I wasn't worried.For months after we broke up, I'd stalk him online. Okay, that's a lie. I still stalk him. At least once a week I Google his username, which is how I've found his Twitter, Flickr, Flixster, and Fubar sites, as well as his profiles on adultspace.com and True.com. (Which, just for the record, is only supposed to be singles, and as his wife of almost 20 years can tell you, he is not. So for you singles out there looking for love online, be wary of men's profiles that say they are interested in "dating only".)
The most interesting Google result I've turned up, however, was one on... *sigh* wifelovers.com. Yes, apparently there is a website out there dedicated to all the men who love the sight of a baggy, saggy middle aged woman, a definition that definitely fits me. -- Sidenote: Orange always said that breasts were meant to hang down, not to be perky and stand up. "That's not a woman, that's a girl," he'd say. -- So I followed the link to his user profile on that site, where I found something a little ... umm... interesting.
He was replying to someone else's request to trade "faceless photos" of your wife.
Now it is true that I met Orange online. It is true that our affair was conducted almost exclusively through the internet. It is true that Orange had the basest of technological know-how, enough to set up profiles and instant message and even blog a time or two.
Unfortunately, it is also true that Orange had absolutely no techno-savvy beyond that. He probably could not crop a photo if his life depended on it. He had to ask me how to block someone from contacting him on Yahoo, and then I'm pretty sure it was me he blocked. Add to all this the fact that he IS a very possessive man, and his wife is extremely conservative, meaning there is no way that the photos he was trading were of his wife.
Which begs the question, who else's photos would he be using to trade? Hmmm... I wonder.... I wonder if he just might happen to have.. oh.. say.. 100 or so photographs of a woman in various states of undress and sexual poses that he might be willing to part with, seeing as how he'd ended his relationship with her. I wonder if he would bother to take the time to learn how to crop out identifying features, like her face. Hmmmm....
It doesn't really bother me too much. I can't even fathom anyone else getting pleasure from the pix. I do think, though, the lesson here is that I should probably never run for public office. Lol!
Have you ever sent someone naughty pictures, only to have them show up somewhere else?
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- From: whisperitloudly@xanga
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Comments (48)
no. i have only sent them to one person (whom i'm still dating) and he isn't the type to share. ever. his mother built lots of respect for women in him. haha. yes, he was a mommy's boy.
that sucks tho that this happens a lot to girls.
xo
I have not personally done it, no. But two of my co-workers were dating (although dating is really a strong word for what they were actually doing...) at one point. She sent him very raunchy pictures via cellphone, which he then flashed to just about everyone at our office including our bosses.
I can't imagine how she goes to work every day, knowing that our (male) bosses saw a picture of a dildo in her vag.
I used to send naughty pictures to my bf. I trusted him and in fact, we're still together so I dont really bother much about the pictures. He's very possessive too. And he deleted all the emails with that pictures after viewing them. He didnt even save them somewhere else coz he said someone might found the pictures. I dont think I'd find any of the pictures I sent anywhere on the Internet. But I would never send my pictures to anyone if I only know them online... Never trust anyone on the Internet. Never.
Oh this reminds me to a story my bf told me a few months ago. He was browsing online, and he saw his ex's picture on a porn advertisment. I'm so proud of her!
Oh wow. I wouldn't do that. It could be used against you way too easily.
so you're a hot soccermom
does your body resemble denise richards or rosie o'donnell
never send naughty pics to promiscuous men with liar tendencies LOL
@JessxMaxine@xanga - I suppose it does happen to people! I just never considered it happening to me. Oops! Lol.
@MuggleLouise@xanga - Oh my gosh. That's horrible. At least this guy is far far away and we know absolutely none of the same people. So if he IS sharing them, I do not need to run into them. Yikes.
@raiyaya@xanga - Haha! I love both of your comments! I am definitely too trusting. And that is hilarious about finding his ex's photo!
@zz - Lol!! I'm far more Rosie than Denise. Your last line is very true. It should probably be embroidered somewhere. :)
@Meowmeowkimmaee@xanga - Like I said, I don't think I should run for public office. :)
No, can't say that I've done it.
A ton of my friends have though...
I've sent naughty pictures to only 2 people, and I believe the 1st one now hates me sooo i dunno... hopefully not...o_o
i've only sent naughty pictures to my husband (i figure it wouldn't probably be a good idea to send them to someone else's husband; i'm not sure i could trust a guy who was already cheating on his wife to protect my dignity by keeping them under wraps....). my ex probably would have really loved me sending some to him while we were dating, but i can guarantee you they'd be all over the place by now if i had. which is one of many reasons why i didn't.
:)
@follow_home@xanga - You make a VERY good point! One that I didn't consider first, but definitely should have. :)
@givemecoke@xanga - Yikes. Hopefully not.
@SparklingDandelion@xanga - Cute profile pic. Thanks for commenting. :)
I sent naughty pics to my boyfriend, and I kept thinking after we'd broke up that he would be a jerk like he always was and post them in places. But after talking with him a while, just in general, I found that he really isn't a vengeful person...not like it was my fault that we broke up, but I didn't want it to happen and got kind of annoying. So he had reason to be a bitch...but he didn't do it.
If guys have the balls to do that, or even just show their friends, you can't trust them.
I've sent pictures to my boyfriend of a year (we're not together anymore). After our nasty and bitter breakup, those pictures went around his group of friends and his college band. I was embarrassed, but what could I do? They could laugh, but I know I looked good. :P
Yeah - not only did I take and give photos to an Ex while I was seeing them for 3 years, I met one of his more recent exes, and we had a very pleasant conversation that pretty well ended when she said "You know, he tried to prove to me you aren't a lesbian. He showed me a bunch of pictures.." I took it rather well and said "I could be embarrassed, or ashamed, but I'm not because I know he's crazy (still), for having those pictures after 2 years of not dating.."
Yeah. Crazies are not fun.
i will never send a naked pic of me to anyone. altho i have some on my pc! :X
It happened to me recently. The picture wound up on facebook, with half my classmates seeing it. Luckily most of the people I talked to didn't judge me harshly, instead they thought that whoever posted it was "Fucked up". I'll never take another picture though. Too much of a burden.
I've sent some. I've received some. I've never shared any. And I haven't come across any of my photos online... I think I can trust the very few guys I've sent pics to... We'll see tho. Lol!
My ex wanted pictures like that, but I was smarter about that and didn't do it. ha..
@JessxMaxine@xanga - haha, thats what you think NOW. sorry, first comment I saw that made me giggly.
I've sent naughty pix to only person. We're not dating but I trust him completely. He has no reason to show my pics and i have no reason to show his. We always delete them after we get them. It's all in good fun for us. I wouldn't do it to anyone else tho. He just holds my trust.
@nolan_kun@xanga - no, i know.
No. I dont take pictures of myself half naked, sorry.
during one of my past relationships, the ex at the time and i made some 'naughty' vids. when we broke up, i didn't think of it at all....until my buddy suggested: "what would you do if he still had it...worse, if he shared it?"
now, the type of person my ex ws... possessive, territorial, private, and all that other following attributes would conclude that the moment we broken up, he had deleted it (it was done via webcam) because he'd feel guilty about having it while he was in a new relationship. and i know that the moment we broken up, traces of my existence was probably wiped clean by the time his new gf entered the picture. but it still made me wonder.... and then shudder from thinking such thoughts. this is probably the reason why i no longer participate in such acts of 'exotic entertainment' with my later relationships....but yeah, it's a provoking thought really.
@wizard_howl@xanga - That's good it ended well.
@MarksBeneathTheSkin@xanga - I kinda feel the same way. I mean, I don't think I look exceptionally good, but I suppose he's trading with others with similar tastes, so it doesn't bother me much.
@rebelmug@xanga - Ah... crazies. They deserve a blog of their own, don't they?
@GaMeGurLsH@xanga - @ashleyannaka@xanga - @aiinos@xanga - That's the best choice if you don't want to have to wonder where the photos will show up.
@savvysea@xanga - Yikes! I would probably feel differently if I thought my photos were going to everyone on my friends list.
@Broken_Beautiful@xanga - Lol, hopefully!
@GiantUnicorn@xanga - Wow. You're NOT dating but you share pix with each other? How did that come about?
@kor_girl@xanga - Yeah, it never crossed my mind either until I found that Google result.
@whisperitloudly@xanga - It's still weird too me. But we appreciate each other a lot. Pretty much the only people who understand what each other have gone through. It all started out jokingly and then it became a sort of release. We'd totally be some sort of a couple if he didn't still live in Hawaii and wasn't in Australia ATM. haha