Miss AlligatorI met my boyfriend soon after I started college, so that might be the reason that we never went on a "real date" until we were officially together (and even then, in nine months, we've only been on three). I didn't have boyfriends in high school, because I was just too busy with academics, along with the fact that I was way too angsty (but that's a different story, haha). Even then, I'm not all that sure that other high schoolers ever went on dates before being "official". The dates I imagine that people don't seem to be having are the ones I remember Cory & Shawn going on in Boy Meets World (I watched that show religiously about 10 years ago, so maybe the whole actually dating thing is just out of style now?)
In college, it seems like other couples got together the same way that my boyfriend and I did. They start as friends, begin hanging out a lot, feelings develop on either side, someone makes a move, and then if the people involved decide they want to make things official, they'll do so by putting it on Facebook (It's sad, but I think some people see it this way: It's only official if it's on Facebook :P)
So I wanted to know, does anyone these days go on dates before they become official and have the title of being in a relationship?
Comments (77)
I have only been taken out on 2 dates before a relationship, one with my current SO and one with a really awesome guy I met. I have been on a bunch of dates with my SO, but only one before we were actually "together." The other guy was incredibly awesome and really fun. We went to Downtown Dallas and ate lunch at some restaurant outside where there was a live Jazz band. We spent the whole afternoon walking around and talking. I wish people would go on dates and see how fun it is!
That's exactly how my boyfriend and I started out. I think its better to get to know them before you start dating, I mean, doesn't that make more sense?
im in the process of that right now :) been on 6-7 dates since we met last week ha...we havent made it official yet and im not sure whats going to happen since ill be leaving in a few months for the military :( but i hope so...
My SO and I actually got into a relationship barely even being friends, let alone going on dates. All we knew what that we liked each other, and BAM! we were official.
i think the whole point of dates is to get to know your date; if you like her, you continue to go out with them, if you don't, then you thank her for her time and you move on...
I went on 3 dates within a week before we came a couple. We clicked really fast and had alot of things in common.
Well my exp boyfriend and i went on a date the day before he decided he wanted to be with me. Ahaha, he never really asked me out. so i made him ask me. and that was a month later. hahah silly silly.
Same as you. I was friends with my boyfriend for about a year before we were "official". We went out with friends, but I don't think those were considered "dates". Actually, I don't really know if my boyfriend and I actually go out on "dates".
My boyfriend and I double dated a couple times before we were official. We made it official on an actual date.Â
my ex and i used to go on dates all the time, at least once a week. it would either be dinner, a movie, a spa date, or even just a drive down to the beach, sometimes it wouldn't even be something that involved spending money. it was always nice because we didn't see each other as much as we would like to but still spent the time together. it was fun but it's different when you're already in a relationship and going on dates than when you're not official yet and going on dates.
I hung out with guys one-on-one, sometimes before we became official, sometimes it ended at dates. But they weren't exactly "dates", per se. It was more of hanging out together, just the two of us. If we ended up doing something, great. If we ended up just hanging out at each other's houses surfing the internet together or watching tv with each other's families. Usually we would end up with a group of friends, smoking hookah, or all going out to eat or to someone's house to hang out together.
I've only went on "official dates", like just the two of us out to dinner, or to movies, or to see the Cherry Blossoms, etc, with one guy, who happens to be the one I'm with now and plan to be with for a long time to come.
I never thought about that before. That's kind of interesting.
In this generation? Not sure. I don't think it's accepted in youth society today to be asked out by a complete stranger and meet with him for a swanky night on the town. People have the idea of "stranger-rape" on their minds and it's too dangerous to do that with someone you don't know or barely know. Becoming friends first eliminates the formality of starting a relationship that dates present.
Yes, it still happens...I feel like a college campus is a completely different story. That's a different lifestyle separate from "real life." I just graduated from high school and started going on dates with a guy who graduated with my class. We had our third one tonight. It's not official yet...but it seems like from what others say, dates are common!
i've actually never dated. i met my current boyfriend in my sophomore year of high school and we started talking a couple of times to get to know each other. after that, we ended up getting together and established a relationship that has now been going for about six years (and still counting). within those six years we also became best friends and went out on relationship dates. but i didn't date before we made it offical. plus it kind of makes it hard to date when people don't really start dating until they hit the real world in about their mid twenties and i met my guy that i've been with in high school. so in my opinion, i just think it really depends on the person. in my situation, i didn't date but in others, they might have.
i went on one.. and then we were official.
LOLZ.
@sunshinesasha@xanga - same story with me 0_o
I need help too...
Would you call "walking in downtown, sitting on a bench and observing the view of the sky, while sharing headphones with a friend to listen a song or two" a date? Just curious. I'd always thought a date was going out to a movie or a restaurant; which I've done with my bf .
I think going on actual dates happens more after college.
i met my bf when i started uni and it wasnt official for us until a couple of months ago. we hang out a lot before it was official but i dont refer to them as 'dates'
Eh I haven't. In high school, it was kind of like "I like you, you like me" and that was it you were official and "going out" with that person.
The relationship I'm in now was an online relationship, but my boyfriend is with me for the summer before he goes back. So we didn't really waste time haha.
Definitely. It's a new experience for me, though. The last 2 guys I've had a romantic...experience, with, I guess, we were never official. We went on dates and hung out and blahblahblah. We acted like we were official, but weren't.
Wow, I couldn't think of becoming official without going on dates. With my current bf, we dated for about a month and a half before we made things official!
Yeah it still happens. I went on a couple dates with my boyfriend before he was made my boyfriend. I think it all depends on the situation because if you don't really know him that well and don't see him everyday or know him through a group of friends then dating is a great idea to get to meet someone you like.
I do it all the time. I don't want to be official with someone until I know we work well together. Dating is a good way to find that out. But I've also found that most of the people I become official with are people I've met in the same way as you got with your boyfriend. So maybe it's not so effective...
My guy friend and I still aren't official. We go out on a date at least 2 times a week. Of course it feels like we are official. But, when we first started to get to know each other in february we went on Dates. we still do.
This process was simpler when I was younger I think because now that I'm older, the categorization of "hanging out" can often replace the term of "going on a date." For me, when I say I'm "Dating" someone, I mean it, but that person could say we're "hanging out" and it just becomes ambiguous to hell. I'm seeing this guy right now; nobody else but him exclusively on my own decision, and I don't know if we're "official" or not. We haven't really had that "talk" except what kind of 'relationship' we're both looking for at the time.
When I was younger, a date was A DATE. If you hold hands with someone, it's a date. IF they kiss you, you're DATING that said person. Nowadays, people kiss others simply because the mood strikes and hand holding is a personal preference! Anyways, FOR MYSELF I'm probably going to bring up that "talk" to make sure I'm not being presumptuous by saying "I'm dating someone" and we're both not dating other people (i know I'm not but who knows about him?) so I don't get struck by lightening later.... In conclusion: HAVE A CLEAR TALK ABOUT LABELS OR STATUS OF RELATIONSHIP IN ORDER TO AVOID ANY CONFUSION!