Miss Gorilla So, my ex boyfriend and I were reminiscing the other day about our relationship and some of the quirks we had as a couple. The truth is, we were always butting heads because we were both very competitive people with relentless stubborn streaks that constantly got us into trouble. We took an Honors English class together in high school, and we were constantly comparing grades on tests and papers. When we played a game or a sport of some kind, it was always about who won or who was more impressive. While we cared for each other very much, there was always a strong sense of competition that seemed to get in the way.
Don't get me wrong, it wasn't exactly a dealbreaker. We broke up later for reasons that had nothing to do with how passionate we were. Now, I'm dating someone who is much more passive. We don't really compete at all, and in a way I kind of miss that intensity. Looking back, I can't decide if the competitiveness was a good thing or a bad thing. What do you think? Do you compete with your SO?
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Comments (32)
Anything having to do with competing with a girl is a bad thing. They're not supposed to win.
Don't compare your current.
To your ex. Okay.
I feel like when I'm dating someone, the other party is always attempting to compete with me in a way of being "more mature" or maybe knowing more than me. I do not come off as a know it all, but they all intently feel they need to tell me what's "right" in their eyes or what I should do.
If I come off as to know anything more than they do about a subject, they seem rather aggravated about it. I've had a few of them try to go lengths to prove they know more.
Their competitiveness gets on my nerves.
As for school, athletics and such...with other people who I have no relationship with I am competitive. And in those instances I usually don't make too many friends.
So competitiveness is a no go for me when it comes to trying and having any sort of relationship with someone.
Eh my boyfriend and I only compete when we play games. :P
hahah. i've competed with ex's before, but not like on the same thing. example: he's a football star and bragged about all of the scholarship offers he got, all the touchdowns he scored in the state championships, etc. etc. i've got really good grades, though, and i always bragged about those to him since his weren't too great hahah. so we competed like that and, like you and your ex, we broke up for different reasons. just since he graduated and is taking one of those many scholarship offers (hahah) and i'm still in high school :P
Yeah, we compete sometimes in games, or we'll race each other places, etc. We are very different though, so the kind of things HE is good at I have no chance of being better, and the things I am good at he has no chance of being better. We each have our own domain and then compete over the silly stuff.
It works out well.
We're somewhat competitive.
I beat my ex's tetris score and um...she was pretty sad. We had been trying to beat eachothers score for maybe about a week and guess I got a score so high she was disappointed.
Not really. Like lilfirefly said, I only compete with him when we play games like cards, Wii, or Rock Band or something.
I'd rather encourage him to do well in college than compete with him.
i think my brother and his wife do sometimes.Â
Up to a certain point, competitiveness is fine.
My SO used to compete with me, but I wouldn't with him. Competition hurt our relationship, because he would always be negative and say stuff like, "Why are you with me when you can do so much better?" Eventually he got over it and concentrated less on me and more on himself.
So I guess competition can be healthy if both sides have good things going for them. But if it's pretty one-sided, it's dangerous.
I compete with him when we play games. We joke around about kicking the others ass, but we know we're not serious. We're not truly competing.
I think it's kind of petty to compete in a serious manner. Especially if it's someone you love.
Nope. Just joking. I dont like competing with others because someone always gets hurt eventually.
As long as the competition is all playful and never serious and only once in awhile I see nothing wrong with it. Being TOO competitive with anyone or about just anything makes you a bad person in my mind and not someone that I would have in my life.
My sister and her boyfriend make bets about everything and one always ends up cheering for a team they don't like because everything has to be a competition. I think it's stupid.
LOL....I think competing once in a while is just fun!! Sometimes I'm competitive and my bf knows that I can't beat him with my skills, so he went easy on me. It is more fun to lose some and win some and you don't have to be too serious in games, so I think if you both have fun and don't let it go overboard, then competition can be exciting.
I like competition =) So if my future bf wants to compete, briiing it on! =D
Not with things like school--mainly because he is really really smart and I am just average :P
But with games, sometimes!
I hate competition. I'm stubborn and I have to be in charge or else things don't work.
Sometimes, not really. I think it makes things a little bit more fun. ;D
i always compete with him...but i end up losing.
ALL THE TIME WHICH I HATE SO MUCH!! OMFG =.=
lol yeah we dont do things where we're competing that often but when we engage in battle : it gets epic. we had an all-out brawl over the remote one time . usually somebody walks off with pouty feelings. never serious, or lasting though lol
i always compete with my boyfriend. whether it's the quickest to finish a meal or who gets a higher grade. it's quite fun actually, haha.
Well my boyfriend trys to act like he is so good when we play video games.. but honestly whether its a football game, shooting, or guitar hero... i kick his ass no matter what. as for everything else when he thinks i cant do something i normally do. when he is confused about how to put something together, i normally do it for him. then he trys to take all the credit.
yes. we challenge each other every day,but we love each other too.