Wednesday, 17 June 2009
-
I Feel Used And I Don't Know If I Can Trust Him
I met a really cool guy last semester through one of my friends. We seemed to have hit it off pretty well and would hang out sporadically throughout the semester. We’d fool around and kiss, but I didn’t want to go any further unless I knew that there was some commitment; I didn’t want to be just a hook up with this guy. It was really hard to hang out with him. I would text or call to see if he wanted to hang out, but it seemed like every time I did, he was busy. Or he would text or call me when it was more convenient for him to hang out. I really wanted to make it work, but I wasn’t sure if he was willing or if he just wanted to fool around.
One night, I went over to his apartment and we were having a good time. We both got drunk and ended up having sex with each other that night. It was consensual for both of us from what I can remember and I thought that maybe he did want to make a commitment.
That was before my friend told me he had just broken up with his girlfriend a few days ago.
I feel a bit used. Throughout the whole semester we were talking and hanging out, he didn’t mention that he had a girlfriend and I was under the impression that he was single. None of his friends would hint at it either when they saw us together either. And now days after he breaks up with his girlfriend, we end up sleeping together.
I don’t know if I can trust him.
My friend told me that he’s not looking for a relationship at all because he just got out of one that was apparently horrible with his ex. Now he is going around talking to other girls, which I don’t mind, but then he still wants to hang out and is making no attempt to do so and leaving it up to me to drive up and see him.
My friend says that he’s not worth it if he’s not willing to make an attempt. What do you think I should do? Should I give him another chance and hang out with him or should I move on if he is not willing to make an attempt and be truthful with me.
RecommendRelated Posts
Post a Comment
- Back to datingish's Datingish Site!
- Note: your comment will appear in datingish's local time zone: GMT -05:00 (Eastern Standard - US, Canada)
About the Author
-
- From: CountxXtheStarsx@xanga
- About Me: I'm a full time dreamer.
Stats: This Week All Time Posts: 0 1 Views: 0 846 Comments: 0 33 View all posts by CountxXtheStarsx@xanga
Comments (34)
Your friend is right.
you realize you're completely useless if you couldn't know he wasn't single in the months you've known him. he's also scum.
Honey, it sounds to me like he's using you. There's a reason he didn't tell you about his girlfriend all term - he didn't want to ruin his chances with you! I love that you refuse to hook up with a guy before you have some commitment from him, and this is a great example of why that's important.
He didn't respect his ex-girlfriend enough to be faithful to her, and I doubt he will change for you.
If he wants you, he will do anything in his power to come to you. But in this case, he don't want to regardless if he did had a gf or not.
1. He wasn't truthful to you in the beginning.
2. He would call or text you when it was more convenient for him to hang out with you.
3. He's not making any attempt to see or get to know you better.
Hm. Screw that. Find a man who will actually treat you like a woman rather than a hook up.
I've walked in your shoes and know what you're going through. A man that wants to be with you will go out of his way to see you. He will make the effort and in essence be an open book. Don't think that your kind heart and compassion will change him or others like him--it leads to nowhere but pain for you.
Wait for that guy that will treat you like a queen! You deserve nothing less.
move on.
..... run for your life. run like your life depended on it.
stay away from him
If he wants you, he'll make the effort. The fact he was with someone and it never came up looks bad on his end of thing...especially with the make out sessions you two had.
@jeezshoua@xanga - what she said
If he starts out lying, I highly doubt he will commit to telling the truth even if he does "commit" to being with you.
If you're looking for something long term, then move on.
you definitely need to move on. hes just not worth ur love and time.
drop him like he's hot is what i always say.
Good luck with that.
He's not worth it. Get out before you invest any more into him. If you do, you'll just end up being hurt.
Your friend is right. He's not worth your time. at ALL.
Your friend is absolutely right. He's not worth it at all. Move on and find someone who deserves your time and attention.
Best of luck. :)
I was watching TV this morning, and they had a relationship guru on their show, and he said that a true guy will exhibit the three P's:
1) Profess his love for you - usually through giving you a title such as "my girlfriend/fiancee/wife" etc.
2) Provide for you, checking in from day-to-day to see how you are, being involved in your life on a near-daily basis.
3) Protect you, or at least offer his protection
then you're barking up the wrong tree.
And in this case, I'd run a million miles from him and still keeping running.
If he was willing to hide a significant part of his life from you - his girlfriend - and keep you hanging on like a side dish, what makes you think it's going to change?
You're in college: they'll be a thousand other more worthy fish in the sea, and you're deserving of more that what you've had. Chalk this one up to experience, learn from it and move on. You'll be thankful in the long run.
Good luck!
is called a hookup my friend, those are all the signs. would not have slept with that
wow got urself in a bad situation...learn from this.
Move on. If he's not willing to put in the effort to be with you, there is no point in wasting your energy either.
It's college! Don't let this guy keep you from all the better ones that are out there. Next time, just make sure he's single. :X
He was drunk. Did you seriously think he'd be able to make a decision about committment under those conditions?
If he's leaving it up to you, it sounds like he doesn't care. Or by some miracle he's actually smart enough to realize that you feel used and that he doesn't deserve to talk to you. Either way, move on.
you were just his booty call. it sucks but move on, he's just rebounding on you.
I think it takes two to make things work. From the look of this, it looks all one-sided, I think you should just give up and move on. You don't want to be his rebound, noone does, it looks like you like him alot and that you guys have great chemistry together--- but this guy spells TROUBLE and you're just going to set yourself up for a heart break. Move on.
You're deserve a guy who cares, and this guy, looks like he's doesn't give a shit. All he wants is a booty call--- and you DON'T want to be that person. So please, move on, find someone better. Leave this asshole to mend his own broken heart, than using you.