Sunday, 14 June 2009
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The Threesome
Every guy's fantasy. And a topic I'm sure every girl and her girl friends have discussed. Is it taboo? Or is the the norm in today's sex-crazed society?
I was watching a very early episode of Sex and the City, and this issue was brought up. Charlotte was dating a man who asked her if she was willing to try it. He claimed they needed more adventure in the bedroom and that would be the perfect way to spice things up. And when she finally built the courage up to try it, he forgot about her totally while he had sex with some random chick they met at a party; she ended up leaving feeling cheated. I thought to myself, would I ever agree to a threesome with my boyfriend?
If my boyfriend was to ever confront me with the prospect of having a threesome, I would not only blatantly say no, but I would question our relationship, because it would mean that he's not satisfied with me alone. Samantha gave her view of a threesome. She said that the only time you should consider having a threesome is if you're the "newcomer". I totally agree with this point of view. I would hate to sit and watch my significant other having sex with another woman. I would feel cheated. And keep in mind, the man will more than likely pay more attention to the "newcomer" to get a new sexual experience while the "old fogie" sits and watches. That would suck!
I don't fancy the threesome idea at all; I mean the thought might sound exciting, but the actual deed might, make that will, cause more harm than good when it comes to your relationship (in my opinion). How about you? Would you ever consider a threesome; why or why not? Or have you had an experience with one? Give your views.
Disclaimer: This "threesome" discussed refers to two females and one male and takes place within a serious relationship.
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- From: prettygurl2890@xanga
- Name: Dainty
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Comments (91)
Threesomes always eventually destroy the relationship, regardless of how serious, including marriages. They look good on paper but when you go through with it it doesn't look so hot anymore (if it's your relationship).
I dont fancy a threesome either.
um NO way!
its like giving someone permission to cheat
I think under the right conditions a threesome could be fun. My boyfriend and I are in love and have been for seven years now, and we don't want to be emotionally connected in this way with anyone else -- physically however, we've both admitted that we aren't finished connecting with other people (other women, to be specific). So why not enjoy that together? As long as it is he and i *together* having sex with another woman, our emotional bond will remain and we can have a little physical change of scenery.
Of course, under the wrong conditions (like the third person inadvertently giving too much attention to one part of the couple, or having known one part of the couple beforehand and thus being "lopsided" if you catch my drift) things could go drastically awry.
You should only have a threesome when you're absolutely secure in your relationship and in the guidelines you set down.
no way! i would never agree to that under any circumstance. it's not fair to me, as i would obviously like for my boyfriend for myself, not to share with others. that's disgusting!
seen ...
I'd try it.
That being said, I'm not a fan of monogamy usually (as a concept), but stick to it in my relationships if the other partner isn't cool with polyamory. So far, none of my interests have been interested in polyamory, so I guess it doesn't really matter.
Anyway, I'd do it, mostly because I'm totally into women and my boyfriend knows that. He's not into it, though, so it's not like I'm gonna push it. :) I get more than enough satisfaction from him and know that I don't need the threesome. It's just...well, something I'd like to try.
ew
After reading the title I was going to use this Sex and the City episode, but it was in your blog! I would definatley be a newcomer. However, if confronted my boyfriend with the prospect, I think I would definatley consider it, but I'm sure I might chicken out at the last minute purely due to the fact I might be ignored. If somehow there was a way in which it could be guarenteed that wouldn't happen, I'd be so up for it. I'm a very experiemental and fun kind of girl.
@Mangonese@xanga - Ditto.
i do not fancy 3somes either, it's a no no.
IMHO, a threesome is a bit like juggling chainsaws. It's fun to watch others on TV, it sounds easy enough in theory; but in real life, you risk at gruesome & irreversible consequences at the slightest mishap. :D
Moving beyond monogamy only works for 2 kinds of people:
1. People that are so emotionally clueless that they can do ANYTHING and stay together
and
2. People that are so emotionally together and knowledgeable that they know what limits they can set and what limits they can move, and know that just FEELING jealousy is not the same as being at the end of a relationship (begin polyamory discussion here).
Threesomes don't mean anything relationshipwise in themselves; it's the RELATIONSHIP which either can or can not bear the experiment.
It's something I'd like to try but do not have the courage to do.
Can't a three some happen between two men and a woman? Just wondering lol..
But as for me, I would NEVER have a threesome. The idea just disgusts me and I'm pretty sure my overlyemotional self will feel cheated and disgusted with myself too.
If I had an SO who proposed this idea to me, I would make it clear that he has just gotten a few steps closer to being dumped, which would be likely to happen right away.
In an alternate universe where I might find such an act to be acceptable, I would only make the deal if he agreed that we could also have a threesome with another guy. I wonder what he would say about that?
I don't think you are supposed to be enough for one person. I'm certainly not all anybody needs emotionally. Why would I expect to be so physically?
No I couldn't do it. I am insecure enough as is.. I know if I ever agreed to that, it would be the death of our relationship.
No, never. It's like I'm helping my SO to cheat on me.
They have a very appealing feel if you're single and end up by chance alone in one, but when i'm in love i'm in love, and that means no one else. So not really that appealing to me!
I had a threesome, was a "bday" present from my gf and her best friend. We were already really close friends and secure with each other, so it wasn't too difficult for either party.
But honestly? It wasn't really that great. I mean yeah, there were some parts that were scandalously hot and I was glad I had the video camera running, but I think the original poster said it best; the idea of the threesome is merely an exciting idea, something foreign and appealing to someone who has otherwise only been with one partner at a time.
The Threesome: Every man's dream.
Not mine.
I just don't find it as hot as people crack it up to be, I like the one on one intimacy.
Nope i wudnt want a threesome.
I'd have a two girls, one guy threesome, but not if I was in love with the guy.
I didn't have a problem with it and neither did my friends. The boy was my ex boyfriend and the girl's current boyfriend. But it all worked out because she was bi and really liked watching me as well.
So I can't totally object to it. But, if there's even a doubt that one person may feel jealous, I wouldn't risk it.