Miss Rhino
There is something I just can't stop thinking about. And it will kill me unless I talk it out. Don't judge me (too harshly). Here we go...
Ever had one of those all-consuming relationships? I'm not talking an actual relationship. Not a boyfriend just...that someone. That someone in your life that takes over all of your thoughts and actions and you can't stand being with him but can't wait until he calls again. He could be the meanest anyone has ever been to me, and I would still beg for his forgiveness. Or he could be the sweetest, most caring person I have in my life, and I couldn't imagine not having him around. It's twisted, that's for sure. Even when we stopped hooking up, he was a big part of my life. He talked to me about everything, his new girlfriend, his family problems, his own problems, everything. But being friends with him was exhausting, and there was always some level of unresolved (romantic) business between the two of us.
It's been about five years, and we've just recently stopped talking. At first I was glad. It was a pretty destructive relationship when you take a look at it. He had way too much power over my emotions, and he knew exactly what to do with it. I dedicated myself to avoiding falling into his trap again. So when I got back to my hometown (which we share), I tried my best to steer clear of his usual haunts. On the bright side, it gave me a reason to stay far away from the gym.
But then he butt-dialed me.
I saw his number flash across the screen and stared at it in shock. I picked up after a few rings, but he had already hung up. I called him back, and he didn't answer.
So he butt-dialed me. He doesn't actually want to talk to me or see me. He would have picked up my call if he did, or at least called me back later. Pathetic. But it just kept nagging me. And then I remembered that he had a Blackberry. His butt would have had to click the correct letter on the key board, scroll all the way down to my name, and then press send in order for him to accurately butt-dial me. That's a whole lotta gyrating if you ask me. With ample effort from both cheeks I'm sure!
So is this just another game he is playing with me? That's not such a far-fetched idea. He's been known to do things like this before. He knows I'm back in town. Is he making sure I haven't forgotten him? If that was his plan, it worked. Now I can't stop thinking about the call and if he will make another move. I've even put my own Blackberry under my tush to see if I could maneuver a task like that. I swear it's impossible.
So what do you think? Am I acting crazy? I should probably file it under "Unresolved and I Don't Care" and move on. I swear I'm usually more level-headed when it comes to things like this. But have you ever had someone in your life that had bizarre mind-control powers over you/your heart? Yikes is all I can say.
Comments (51)
Butt-dialing, huh?
i get this all the time and then when i call back, he doesn't pick up...i say it's probably just a butt-dial, just don't think about it too much.
if i were you, i wouldnt think so much about it. i actually have a blackberry too & it does that ALL the time. you dont need to scroll with the ball to find the name, if you (accidentally) click a letter, contacts that have the letter in the name will automatically come up.
so he probably did "butt-dial you"
Butt dial just don't happen "accidentally." Try your hardest to forget it and move on. If he wants to contact you, he will. Other than that, don't sweat it. So not worth it.
you're being crazy
Blackberry's suck. I switched it for an ENV3 which kind of sucks... but sucks a little less.
He's not worth it, and you can bet he's not obsessing over you, because it never works that way. But here's the thing...while you're busy obsessing over him, you could be missing the guy that actually is right for you. Do your best to move on and forget this guy...he's no good for you and not worth your mindspace.
-Katie
maybe it's his mother.
I saw the title and was about to share a booty call story with you but now I know what butt dial means. Seriously, why are you obsessing about this bloke? 5 years is alot of wasted time - get it on with someone else, anyone else!
Instead of overthinking, just stop thinking about it. You'll never know if he truly butt-dialed you or not. And does it really matter? Whether he really called you or not does not change the fact that the friendship you two have is not a good one.
ummm...most phones have this nifty option where you can set ringtones...set his to silent.
Better yet, some phones (or phone companies) have the option to block numbers...also a viable option.
Awww, you saw that on a television commercial...
It could have been someone else using his phone who accidently dialed you, saw it was the wrong number, and hung up.
file it under "Unresolved and I Don't Care" and move on.
you're not crazy although is your name common? as in, does he know other girls with similar spelling of your name and he could have ACCIDENTLY dialed on your name, realized he did, hung up before you picked up and didn't want to explain himself so he didn't bother?
or... he is trying to bring you back because he knows he can.
I was in this situation with my ex a couple of months ago.....except it wasn't friendship or a relationship, it was just... destructive. The first two weeks, I thought I was going crazy every day, not hearing his voice or texting him with the mundane messages that used to delight me. then two more weeks passed and it felt GREAT without him. of course that's when I started sleep less and less...unfortunately, I guess i still missed him...habits are hard to break for that reason alone.
BUT don't go back there... you know it's bad, it's unhealthy and really, not worth your time. as my ex and I "consider" friendship, in reality, it's not good for either of us that we attempt that again (we tried and failed miserably). there's just too much STUFF between you two to pretend that friendship can happen, it's just best to cut ties and stay away from the gym (although you can work out at home, no?). :) good luck
I know exactly what you are going through. In high school there was this guy who eventually became my "boyfriend" and he would contole me like crazy...and not only that, he would put me down and eventually I acctually believed everything he said. Took me about 2 1/2 years to fully get over him. But that's what you need to do. Next time he calls I say you DON'T answer it. You deserve better than a game playing boy ;)
p.s. Be strong! I know you can do it b/c I did it! =)
yeah, i've currently got a puppeteer to my heart as well. it's not fun at all ><
he must have a talented tush though if he really did "butt-dial" you!
I think he just doesn't want to be forgotten. I have an ex bf who use to constantly do stuff like that to me. In fact he called about a month ago after we hadn't spoken in like 3 years.
Although it probably wasn't an accident, I'd let it go. He seems to be kind of an A-hole if I may be honest. I've been through a similar situation and it's just not worth all of that energy. You start to lose sight of who you are as a person after a while because this 1 person has control of you and your emotions like a puppeteer. There are more fish in the sea. You sound like a nice person, I'm sure you'll find someone worthy of your time.
I have a Blackberry also.
The terrible thing about Blackberries is the rollerball. It doesn't matter what letter of the alphabet you were previously on in your Phonebook, your butt could easily scroll the ball with a simple movement of phone against pocket friction, and then call when there is pressing friction in your pocket. It's happened to me numerous times, both sending calls/text messages and receiving them from friends and family who have Blackberries.
He may or may not have been staring at your name in his Phonebook and wanting you to call, but it's probably best for you to steer clear of him unless he makes first contact.
my names is in the lower half of the alphabet, yet my mom always butt-dials me with her blackberry.. it stopped when she replaced her phone with a flip phone. so i say its pretty possible to butt dial your number.. just so you know, it normally takes my mom a good 3minutes to try to scroll down to my number and call.. mostly due to the fact she has a hard time navigating that thing.
@kor_girl@xanga - So good to know there is someone out there who has been in this situation. It's like... I know this is bad... but I can't help myself. You are so right though, time to break this habit! Thanks for the advice
@jazziegal97@xanga - Thanks for the comment. I wish I could have the insight you did into my own life! Even though I know he is bad for me and I should forget about it, it helps hearing it from an outside perspective. That way I know I'm right in what I'm feeling... and thank you! I can use all the luck I can get!
@Orlando@xanga - Yes the commercial may have coined the phrase but it doesn't make it any less true. Butt-dialing is a real problem these days and I warned you to bear with me on this one.... Â