Sunday, 07 June 2009
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Relationships Are Like Multiple Choice
I was talking with a friend the other day on the phone about failed relationships. He made a bad call, and ended up ruining a good friendship based on a stupid hunch. He was taking it hard on himself, so I tried hard to remember everything I learned on TV about relationships. As we spoke about it, I came up with this slick metaphor (well I thought it was pretty slick at the time) about finding the right one. I said to him, who was swimming in a bottle of Heineken at the moment, "It's like multiple choice. The ones that appear at first to make sense of the formula tend to self-destruct mid-way. Their input screws up the equation and flips the out-put negative. So observe the choices casually. Test them out. But only choose one. And you know it's the one when it fulfills the riddle in a way the others never can, despite how intuitive they seem. Never go by a hunch. Always try to test your answers against each other. But if you're limited in experience, you can still know whether you've arrived at the right one before you've met any of the others. You just need to understand the variables involved."
He looked up at me, left eye a bit slower than the right. He looked like he was about to compliment me, when he straightened up and said "I'm not talking about freaking trigonometry, dude." So my brilliant metaphor may have missed him.
What do you think? Is relationships sort of like a multiple choice question? What metaphors or analogies have you used in trying to explain the mysteries of relationships or finding the right one?
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Comments (25)
You have to use analogies and metaphors to explain relationships? That's unecessary.
Haha, the metaphor you used is kinda over my head. It can be like multiple choice, I guess, haha. I don't use metaphors or whatever to describe finding the right person, really.
I suppose so? lol I dont think you need an analogy to explain the wonders of love. It simply is a mystery in itself. aha
Some people don't understand relationships as other's do. :P I used to tell my ex-best friend that life was like a multiple choice test, in that sometimes you don't have the answer right away-- like the "who is the love of my life" question-- and you have to skip it and return to it later. But she flies through tests all the time so the metaphor did miss a little too. Lol.
I think that's an interesting way to go about it.
and I don't get why people are like, "oh you're using an analogy to explain relationships/love?" well let's just say that it makes things easier for some people to understand.
That's only assuming that the "one" is someone you already know, otherwise, how can you choose an option that isn't given?
to me it's like a puzzle, sometimes there are pieces that fit and you find it so quickly and then there are times when there are some pieces that just don't fit or you haven't gotten to that point yet so you have to keep putting the puzzle together until that piece's turn to fit the puzzle.
"claps for the intelligent metaphor"
brilliant metaphors.
i use analogies to cope with lifee all the time! :)
um I don't know if everything is multiple choice. But there are endless multiple choices to the choices you make in a relationship, really. Instead of "trying" them out, I would say get to know the person well enough where you don't have to try things out.
I don't know why I added the phrase "over the phone." It wasn't over the phone.
@Dare2BDiferentt@xanga - It might be unnecessary for people who understand relationships.
@ivarahBharavi@xanga - heh, yeah because I know I don't understand em. Anyway, i think sometimes it's good to talk about ideas, if it's just to get a friend whose really hurt thinking about one to get his mind off his pain.
@mewithoutu77@xanga - hmm that's an interesting analogy. i'd add that, sometimes, you don't know you're missing a piece because you think the picture is fine without it, but then you find the piece (or the piece finds you) and, the one missing piece seems to change the point of the entire picture, and you finally know you're finished. =]
@abbikhinz@xanga - Really? I think Life is more like those really painful full-period essays where you're instructed to "Define the meaning the author intends, demonstrate and give an example." (veiled reference to God, hah)
@mycontinuity@xanga - That's the major flaw in my analogy. In addition, how can you really know clearly what all the variables are in knowing if she/he's the one?
I like it.
I think you are right, you have to plug in the numbers to see if the output is what you want. If not, at least you know and won't wonder. And its such a good feeling when you have the right answer! I love math, so I found this post to be relateable.
I sometimes automatically use metaphors for the stupidest things. But those are simple ones.
I really like this one though
I dig it. I try to stay away from analogies related to math, though. So few people get them, which is disappointing, because I rather like them.
Try cars or sports. Most guys do better with analogies based on those things.
haha that's definitely a clever and interesting way to think about it. lol and complicated at that! hahahha
I don't have any metaphor or analogy for relationships, really. I think relationships are different for everyone, so no one metaphor would work for all of them. Even the "They're hit and miss" phrase wouldn't work for some, because sometimes people get in a lasting relationship on their first one.
As for hunches, when it comes to any kind of relationship - I'd never trust a hunch alone.
@nyclegodesi24@xanga - yeah, I don't quite understand them either. so I like reading about different analogies
Wow, that was awesome. I totally understand!! Makes so much sense, I couldn't have said it better myself!! =)
It's an interesting analogy, but I suppose the hardest game of all is figuring out relationships. I myself have not completed the game.
Ahaha I like how you were so philosophical and your friend totally missed the analogy. I can just picture the ethereal epiphany going completely unnoticed.
i know nothing of relationships, and your metaphor is way over my head. haha... i was expecting a different kind of post, and now i feel a little stupid. hahaha...
Nope. Way more like going to a casino. You sit down at a table or machine, if you can't do the poker face thing. Either way you throw away a lot of money and time. But then you go to the next one and the next one. Sometimes you get a couple of 20s. Sometime you hit big. At least ya hope.
Amazing metaphor. I wish I was clever enough to come up with something like that haha! You're very right though. There are so many different choices and they all seem like they should be the right one. But inevitably, they take a wrong turn somewhere. All but one. Beautyinthebeautyout's casino metaphor is also brilliant. Both are pretty risky, although I'm not sure which one is more dangerous: the SATs or Texas Hold 'Em haha
"But I think I like her like a metaphor." -Lupe Fiasco
:D
I think analogies and metaphors make everything fun. although they're sometimes confusing, they make you think a little harder about what's going on.