Monday, 01 June 2009

• It Looks Interesting, But Why Bother?

  

  There is a lovely little modified drink that certain types of people order at Starbucks. Every time I have to make or call this little latte, I scratch my head (figuratively speaking of course, as scratching one's head around other people's drinks is disgusting). It's a decaf grande sugar-free vanilla nonfat latte. Please read that again. Yup, that would be no caffeine, no sugar, no fat. You know what we baristas like to call this drink?

  It's a "Why Bother?".

  I am very aware that Starbucks is America's largest drug dealer. Caffeine is an addiction that many of our "regular" customers embrace (rather expensively, I might add). So why would you go to your drug dealer and ask for coke-free cocaine? The same reason why one should not enter an establishment known for peddling caffeine in large quantities and plop down $5 for a latte that has no kick whatsoever. Why bother?

  Women do the same thing in regards to men. I'll speak on behalf of my sex, although I might be harsh (I always am). A lot of women I know, myself included, order that "tall drink of water" minus the morals, sensitivity, chivalry and many times, brains. We pick "Why bothers?" in men. Most women's "Why bother"s come in the form of "bad boys". I can't speak to this one personally, as I've never gone for bad boys nor understood their appeal. But it seems to be a common weakness among women.

  

  Yeah he's hot, just like your latte, but there is no substance. There is no value, unless a killer smile and great hair is "valuable". And that time he smacked you? It won't be the last. At least the people who order their Why Bother latte have the decency to look chagrined or admit the lack of "oomph" to their drink. We women just excuse the failings of the Why Bother men we pick or try to talk up some real (or imagined) selling points their man has.
  
  Or my weakness: the fixer-upper. All the potential is there; he just needs a little work. Hello, this is a human being, not a house! I learned the hard way that you can't make a person change. All the potential in the world doesn't equal a great guy. He may have the makings of a good man, but he'll always be a boy if he doesn't choose to change.
  
  You see, guys tend to be more honest. If they are dating a smokin' hot blonde, they don't tell their buddies how smart and communicative she is. They say she's great in bed. Because that's why they are dating her - she's eye candy. When women date a hot guy, they admit they got a hot guy, but they try to pass him off as more, and when he treats them exactly like he's apt to do, he's a bastard and we women rave about how he changed. BS. Sorry, chica, you wanted the pretty boy, not the sweet, kind man who would treat you right. You opted for the Why Bother and got burned.

  I am not trying to be cruel or judgmental toward people who've had a rough time in relationships. And I'm also not saying a guy (or girl) can't be sexy and kind and moral and mature. I know plenty of people who fit that bill. But next time you gamble in a person you know is a box of hair, please remember you're ordering the human equivalent of a decaf grande sugar-free vanilla nonfat latte. Why bother?

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