Thursday, 28 May 2009
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Can You See Yourself Marrying The Person You're Dating Now?
So I was at my family's Easter party, when my mom brought up the subject that I have a boyfriend. All the men in my family started to freak. Typical "if he hurts you you tell me and we will take care of him" kind of deal. So then my uncle took me out of the room to have a little "chat" about my relationship status. He said a lot of things that were reasonable and worth mentioning, but there was one thing that stuck with me the most.
He told me about how in college one of his friends had asked him what the point of dating someone was if you couldn't see yourself marrying that person.
Now, I'm only 17 years old. I'm definitely not looking for marriage in a person yet (and he knows that)...but the idea still stuck with me.
Can you see yourself marrying the person you are dating right now? Can you date someone without having an intent to stay with him or her forever?
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- From: waste_my_time_x7@xanga
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Comments (109)
Yes. A boyfriend and a best friend. He's the only one who really knows me and understands me.
I can undoubtedly see myself marrying my boyfriend. I'm the type of person who wants a serious relationship, so I wouldn't be with someone if I didn't think it'd last.
Yes. I date him because I want a future with him.
There are things about him that bug me, but I can see myself marrying him. He makes me happy :) despite him not making my parents very happy >.>
that's also the kind of mindset i have. like if i don't see a future, then what's the point? I think everything is all about a learning experience. besides sometimes you can't know right away you know? You have to grow to be in love with the person. it's not a love at first sight type thing.
I think in serious relationships, the couple should see some sort of a future together. Casual dating, open relationships, etc doesn't really matter if there is a future in it or not.
Since I'm in a serious relationship with my boyfriend I see that :) What a day it will be ;)
1st boyfriend: pleaaaase, no. we were too immature & in high school to think about marriage. life was way too full of stupid drama.
2nd boyfriend: i kept trying to see him as someone i'd spend the rest of my life with, and i just couldn't...even tho i tried so hard...and things failed.
3rd boy friend: we're not dating, but wow, we should be, and wow I would totally marry him.
why are some things so simple? \
Well the boy I am with now I had better be able to see myself getting married to as I am engaged to him, but when we were in the boyfriend/girlfriend phase, I could definitely see myself marrying him.
Sometimes you date someone who you know who isnt the one for you because inside you hold onto hope that "maybe you'll never know." And even though he might not be the one, you shouldnt have to give up on all the happiness he might be able to provide.
yes.. because i'm not dating anyone. and i picture myself being alone for a looooooonnnnnngggg time.
Yes. He's everything im looking for. He makes me happy. Yeah, he aggrevates me at times but i can definately see him in the future.
That's always the way I've looked at: what's the point if I can't see myself with him for life.
Some people don't want the life partner thing. Or they do but they're ok with Mr. Right For Now too.
But I don't want to spend my time with someone whom I know I can't be with for a long time because I won't be getting much out of the relationship. The whole I'll be thinking "He's nice but not sticking around"
I can definitely see myself marrying my boyfriend.
The only person i can think about marrying is my ex. Aint gonna happen. Love is such a serious thing, and yeah i sometimes wonder if this guy is gonna be worth my time, not so much that i think about marriage, but i take it a few months at a time at least. or somethin.
Yes, yes I can. :)
I think it is good to date around when you are younger to see what is out there, it's when you get older that you date with the thought of marriage in the back of your head. But to answer your question yes, I can absolutely see myself marring the guy I'm dating. He's my everything =)
no I can't. I think we date so we know what we like and dislike. What will work and what doesn't. Once we're over all that and we've found someone who can stand us for an extended amount of time we call it love and get married.
I just like to live in the moment. The future is there, in the future and the present is here, right now. So I'm going to enjoy this and when the rest comes I'll worry about that.
No, actually. Right now, I'm happy with him, and I'm not concerned about the future more than a few months ahead. Why not, if we're enjoying ourselves?
I also agree that dating can help you learn what you like and dislike in a partner and gain more experience for future relationships.
I don't really see anything wrong with just dating for fun & not worrying about the future so much. I'm 21, a senior in college and I have a lot of friends who are getting serious with someone or engaged & going to be married after we graduate but I'm not in any hurry to find that one person. I think it's kind of important to date different people to find out what you want & don't want in a future partner.
i love my girlfriend. i can definitely see her as my future wife. :)
At this point I limit myself to dating people with whom I could see myself having a future with. Why waste time on guys who just aren't looking for the same things in life that I am? I'd rather have someone working with me towards my goals, I guess.
And yes, I certainly can see myself marrying the guy I'm with now. Its come up before, we're just not sure when we'll get around to it.No. It's not a serious relationship... Dating for fun helps me realize how I am as a person and helps me figure out what I want in a potential husband. Some things I thought I could handle turns out that I couldn't. It's a learning experience and plus, I'm only 20.
Of course. I don't see the point in staying in a relationship if you know it is not going to last.
of course.. i see myself marrying my bf... that's the only reason why we started dating because we wanted a future together. But we are in a serious relationship and we are doin good, but everybody looks forward to marrying the person that they are dating now usually. If not, why bother dating or be with someone because that wouldn't make sense to me at all.
Most chicks will probably say yes and most the guys will say no unless their current squeeze has an xanga and goes through reading all of the comments he posts.
Definitely.