Miss Walrus
For whatever reason, my BFF has the habit of meeting people...particularly, guys, everywhere she goes. I don't know why (or more importantly HOW) it happens but it's like guys - however random, ridiculous and/or totally not her type they may be, flock to her in droves.
So, this past weekend we ventured across the state together for a little Midwest summer music festival action. Although we never actually made it to the festival we planned on, we did make it to a couple (okay, like ten) bars, and of course, this meant that my bestie found not one, not two, but a whopping three guys, all of whom not only wanted to buy her uber-expensive margaritas but also talk to her about life and love and how beautiful the stars looked. Lucky.
One random (but nonetheless very attractive) guy, after seeing me and my BFF meandering outside a local pizza shop devouring some late-night slices, walked up to her with a freshly picked flower and said nonchalantly, "I think you dropped this." Now, although I found this a little cheesy and unnecessary, my friend was all googly-eyed. We spent the rest of the weekend hanging out with said guy and although it was totally awkward being "Miss Third Wheel," I dealt with it because the two of them were so absolutely adorable together. I don't know what it was - but something about their conversations, which I normally would've found nauseating, were making me hope and pray that this guy was "the one" for her. They seemed to share a genuine connection and I felt that their brains just kinda "clicked."
But then, Sunday came and reality set in.
We now had to take a ridiculous five hour long car ride back across the state and leave Wonder Boy in his own territory. Even though I didn't receive a flower or any of the cute hugs and kisses and cuddles that were exchanged in my backseat during the course of the weekend, even I was sad to leave Wonder Boy waving from his driveway.
However, because I hadn't actually had time to converse with my friend about her feelings for the guy because they'd been attached at the hip for the entire 36 hours they knew each other, I didn't find out till the drive home that BFF was not really as into him as it seemed. She liked him, sure, but she and I were both contemplating if it was really worth it to try to build a relationship with someone across the state...who she had only known for three days.
After a good day away from him, though, she started to change her mind a little...and started to find ways to direct any conversation she was having into talking about him. But now I, as the trusty BFF, can't help but wonder if some flings are better left that way? That maybe the reason his and her emotions were so strong was because they were strangers - and he knew we were driving five hours away the next day and would never have to see her again if he didn't want to?
I'm really not the type of girl to engage in such behavior (most of my boyfriends and I were friends for months before we ever got together), but I really do wonder if this could blossom (get it? 'cause he gave her a flower? Ha!) into an amazing relationship for the two of them if they wanted to try. Or is this just wishful thinking....especially because BFF will probably meet another Mr. Right (or at least another Mr. Right Now) in a couple weeks?
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Comments (20)
Rule of thumb: Absolutely anything can happen.
I've always detested the idea of flings because they seem disrespectful to real relationships. I guess if it's just for fun, people can do what they like, but to call it 3-days-worth of fun a relationship is not legit.
I've had flings; the longest went on for four days. They were all fun while they lasted, and I definitely exaggerated my feelings after the fact, but in retrospect, I'm glad that they ended.
Not into flings.
I agree with Meowmeowkimmaee.
definitely a fling, you can feel like you have a strong attraction with someone you just met but that doesn't necessarily mean he's mr. right. if he was, faith will come and they will meet again. on my belief
No offense. But at what age is looking for flings in bars associated with just being a common everyday old "bar fly"?
I dunno, it sounds like it could potentially turn into something. Not all flings are like that, though.
I don't like flings for myself. I'm looking for someone to hang around a little longer than a few weeks.
Yes .....
me and my current bf were very.. i guess i took it as fling to start with..
today he asked me i actually liked him when he asked me to be his gf.. i guess i just thought might as well and it turned out to be great! :)
i guess some flings could be more.. im not sure~ because i treated my bf as a fling at the beginning since he was all that sweet and aww stuff but it turns out he actually kept that up for the past 6 months!! :)
have been in your friend's, and your shoes. flings are short term fun. logically, you know it'll never work though, so you tell yourself not to get attached. but because the short time was perfect and you haven't found each other's faulty qualities yet, it does kind of linger on and make you wonder how it could have been. but eventually, it'll set in that maybe you've only seen one side of this fling-boy, and it may never have worked in your real life setting.
i would never date someone i met on an impulse, but this kind of thing defs happened to me. the beauty of it is that you KNOW it'll only be for a few days, so there's really nothing tying you back as it would when you're looking for a mr. right (does he have a job? what are his hobbies? would he and my other friends get along? etc). just don't go too far i guess, keep it as a romantic experience and a nice memory but don't do anything you'd regret.
Flings are good fun for guys, till he knocked up some poor gal.
Driving hours to see guys makes it so much more worth it, yes she should give it a test drive.
@Meowmeowkimmaee@xanga - I completely agree with you on that.
I'm not into flings like that. :\
THE IDEA is attractive; a super-short romance out of town, you don't deal with anything negative, you meet, let your emotion wrap you up with its own magical packaging and have "fun" until you leave and you don't have any commitment or guilt for having "Fun" at the next stop. But in practice, either your emotions run your life completely and you excuse yourself for not having any self-control or will, it's not the best way to go about things, is it?
Plus depending how "serious" the flings progress, don't you end up wondering "how often does he do something like this?" I mean, they (your friend and him) would prob say "I never felt like this way before," or "with you, I'm so different" or something other BS like that... but it's not true for your friend, why would it be for the guys? And where have they been, were they always using protection? Is this a seasonal sport?Yeah, no for me. Too many questions and I don't know if I can answer any of those questions when reflecting afterwards....
I don't like flings.
@natashasmells@xanga - haha my LDR guy never appreciated me driving hours to see him most weekends and left me to sleep with underage high school girls. Yayyy~! I guess it depends on the guy though. I've recently found out how much of a douche mine was.
i had two and one of them became a regular and it became a convenience, no strings attach and just leave after it's over.
I think flings are fine. They normally don't turn into anything but the moment you say that is when it turns into something. I've had flings and maybe one turned into something for a few months.
Somethings a fling is what you need or want at the time and there's nothing wrong with that. They're not disrespectful to LT relationships or an indication low morals or lack of self control, they're just a fun time with someone you are attracted to.
This doesn't seem too stable...