Fmylife.com contains short day-to-day life anecdotes. A simple recipe: in one sentence, each site visitor can tell the shitty moment which ruined his day. These short stories must begin with "Today" and end with "FML".
Here are our favorite five submissions from
F*** My Life this week:
Today, I was surprised to learn that I could carry on intelligent conversations about basketball with my guy friends. Then I realized it was because my boyfriend insists on watching ESPN while we have sex. FMLToday, we were visiting my great-grandma, who has Alzheimer’s. We spent most of the day with her and she didn't know who we all were. Time came for us to leave so when I gave her a hug good-bye, she whispered into my ear, "You're my type." FMLToday, I was on the bus home and on the phone with my best friend discussing my sex life with this new guy I'm seeing. I was telling her all sorts of raunchy sex things we've done until someone taps my shoulder and says "I'm sure he doesn't appreciate you saying this in public." It was his mom. FMLToday, my boyfriend and I were "fooling around." It started to get hot and he took out his penis for the first time. This was the first one I've seen in real life so I decided I'd complimented it. I had no idea what to say so I said, "It's pretty." FMLToday, I was at the mall blasting music, I was wearing a nice shirt and had my ipod in my breast pocket when I noticed a cute girl smiling at me so I smiled back and she started to walk over while turning down my music while smiling. It looked like I was rubbing my nipple. FMLthat great-grandma one was so cringeworthy.
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Comments (17)
LMAO @ the last one. I can imagine it in my head already... ahhhh
C0mm2N+ ....
I read all of these on the site and laughed my ass off at the first one. I'm in the same boat, but instead of basketball it's with cars. And drift racing.
HAHA! The last one is awesome!
The second one and the last one were the best.
haha! those are great!
HAHA, wow.
"It's pretty."
That's a winner. lmao.
hahahaha its pretty !!
"It's pretty." Haha good one.
I believe the more appropriate compliment would have been, "Damn, it's huge."
my favorite for sure was "it's pretty". i'll have to try that line out on my husband next time and see how he likes it. lol.
:)
LMAO at the second to last one.
I am not spending the next two hours reading FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were
"fooling around." It started to get hot and he took out his penis for
the first time. This was the first one I've seen in real life so I
decided I'd complimented it. I had no idea what to say so I said, "It's
pretty." FML
HAHAH wow this made my day.
LMAO!!!!!!!
phew. lucky she didn't give out comment like that to me..
it's pretty
LMAO
"it's pretty"
hahahahha. hilarious. love the last one too!
LOL they were all hilarious