Friday, 15 May 2009
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Should I Go for A Guy Who's Three Years Younger?
Okay, I'm not usually one to vent about my problems on the internet, but this problem begs to be blogged. I have a friend (shocking I know) that is the nicest person you could ever meet. He is smart, funny, has a great smile, and can be perverted on occasion (okay, so he can be perverted very often, but so can I). That might be why we get along so well.
And, be it as it may, I have come to have a slight crush on him. The problem is, he is a little bit younger than me - three years, to be exact. I don't want people to think I'm taking advantage of a younger guy, but also I really like him. Should I go for it and ask him out or should I just leave it alone and stay friends with him?
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About the Author
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- From: xXnightshadeX@xanga
- Name: Elphie
- About Me: I like to read, write, and listen to music. I'm a hopeless romantic and it gets me into trouble alot.
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Comments (61)
It depends on how old you are. If you're 23, and he's 20, that's no big deal. If you're 16 and he's 13, don't rush anything.
I'd say you probably don't want to be dating a 15 or 16 year old (or younger) . Too immature. 17 is iffy. 18 - maybe. 19 why not?
To echo Matt... it honestly depends on the age. If you're 18 and he's 15... I'd tread softly (actually, is that particular example even legal?). If you're both in your 20s ... it's not so much a big deal. But more than numerical age are the life experiences that come with time... unless y'all are compatable on that plane (i.e. you're both moving forward in adulthood, you're both in high school, whatever), you're asking for relationship complications. Good relationships are based on similarities.
Jaded has that one right. If you are both over 18 then it seems fine to me. Time has a way of making most age differences not really matter.
If he can be a "man" in a relationship, why not? It also depends on his "maturity" level as well.
When I was 19, I dated a guy who was a year and a half younger than I was. I was working, going to college (finishing up my Associates), had a car while he was still in high school (finishing up his Senior yet), have no job, have no car, and still depend on his parents for mostly.. everything.
Hm. Sorry, but I'm a woman. I like to be cater every now and then. I don't want him to rely on me. It also got very awkward when we went out on dates. Should I pay for everything since I had a job? Or should he.. since he still get allowances from his parents? It was icky.
A month and a half.. goodbye. I couldn't take it anymore.
Don't get caught up with the number. If he carries himself well and you like him for who he is, go for it.
Yes!
Somewhat depends on the age.
But, if you're a little bit on the young side, get ready for lots and lots of people looking down on you.
Remember, stay true to yourself.
Numbers are trivial, it's the emotions that count. I agree with the above bloggers, if he's under 18 just becareful, other than that go for it. Good luck!
My husband is 3 years younger than me. So yeah, go for it!
Yeah pretty much what people have been generally saying. As we get older the age differences really don't matter too much. It matters more when we're younger just because we're at different points in our lives and so much can change during the course of 3 years (say transitioning from high school to college).
Love knows no numbers! Go for it!
My boyfriend is 2 years younger than me. I was iffy about it at first, but it's been almost 2 years and no regrets. =)
age is nothing but a number. and as you get older, the age really doesn't matter, just as long as you connect. my boyfriend is 2 yrs younger than me, almost 14 months and still we're going strong. ♥
I like that when someone wants to date someone insanely older than them, everyone says, "Age doesn't matter!" but when something like this happens people talk about maturity and such.
My opinion with all of those situations is to just keep it legal.
a few years is hardly noticable. the older you get, the less noticable. males die younger, age faster, go for it!@
Thanks for all the comments. You guys are really helpful!
go for it! i PREFER dating guys younger than
me. of my relationships one was 2 years younger than me. one was 3
years younger than me. one was exactly a month younger than me and the
other was 2 years younger than me. and most of the guys i've liked have
been around 2 years younger. it really isn't a big deal...and there is
no difference. if you like him so much and think he is so amazing then
why should a silly thing like their age hold you back from possible
happiness with him?
younger guys suck. i'm 19 and I've found that any guy under the age of 25 is a waste of time. they're minds arent matured yet and they still want to be crazy teenagers. now not to say there isnt a mature and down to earth 22 year old...they're just harder to find.
To agree with mostly everyone, it really depends on your age. If you are in your mid twenties and three years younger, this is much different then being 16 and 13. Mostly the issues that arise from being a few years apart are simply from where a person is in their life. As someone else said, a person in college dating someone in high school is going to have different ways of thinking and is probably more independent. If you really like the guy though, I say go for it.
who cares what people will think about it?! if you like him then go for it. too many people miss out on stuff now because they fear what others will think, so don't miss out on a good thing because of what others may think about a very small age difference.
do what you feel. love is ageless.
Well if you think it would work go for it! =] At my school I have a friend who is a senior dating a freshman, and they're doing pretty well. They get jokes about the girl being a cougar and and the guy being a pimp or something along those lines. Then there's me, a senior with a freshman girlfriend. Which also is working out pretty well so. It really just depends on the person. And you probably won't be having sex or anything for awhile, since it's kind of illegal. (I don't really mind that though.) So if you needed examples of it working out here's some. =]
I'd say if you're 18 and he's 15... no.
I think I'd say go for it if he's older than 18.
Just make sure he's ready to handle a relationship. Three years isn't very much of a difference age wise, but it can be the difference between a 15 year old that still has a cracking voice and obsession with video games and fart noises or an 18 year old with a stable voice and an obsession with video games and fart noises.
But yes, don't rob the cradle if you're older than 17. You can run into legality issues if things turn sour and his parents don't like you very much. If you're both over 18, it's not as big of a deal since you're both technically adults. Either way, I can understand love being love. Just be careful and be safe (and make sure he's into you too!).
If the guy is under 18, just be careful. Otherwise, give it a shot. You never know. :D
Best of luck to you!!!! :)