My phone buzzed as I was leaving campus, and I saw it was a text message from my boyfriend. We'd been flirting via text for the last few minutes so I opened the text which, to my surprise, read "You make my heart skip beats" .
WHAT?!
"You make my heart skip beats."
Now I know my boyfriend likes to be cheesy - he brings it out in me a little, but I never say something so obviously untrue. I mean really, if his heart is skipping beats, I think he has bigger issues than our long-distance relationship.
I texted back "Better not skip too many or you'll die." You know, being my sweet self.
He then caught on that he was being a little too mushy - because we've had this conversation before - and toned it down a little, but he still does it from time to time. He often tells me he would never break up with me because I'm so good, but he can't promise that after we've been seeing each other for a month!
He was hurt that I asked him to stop, because for him it's like I'm asking him not to tell me how much he cares for me; I've never met someone who does this and I'm really not sure what to do about it.
Have you ever been in a relationship where your SO was over-the-top cheesy? How do you deal with it, or is it all me?
Is there such a thing as being too devoted?
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Comments (64)
What can we do ?
I'd do exactly what you're doing. If he can't handle a bit of mocking as a joke, he's taking himself too seriously.
Boy can deal.
Oh, and I want to know: did it hurt when you fell from heaven? Do you consider yourself the peanut butter to my jelly? Just throwing it out there.
How annoying.
i've actually got one of those right now!
and i am with you, sometimes the things he says make me want to kick him in the mouth.
"does everyone else know how AMAZING you are?"
"you are a once in a lifetime opportunity, brianna."
"okay, you seriously look damn sexy driving this truck." (actually, i kind of liked this one =P)
i always call him cheeseball, but what can he do? he's just showing how he likes me the best way he can. if you like him enough, hell, it's kind of nice sometimes (:
No. There's no such thing as being too devoted.
aww he's in complete rapture in the honeymoon phase. at least he gets it when it's too much for you, right?
I dunno, I personally think that the fact that he needs to constantly be telling you how much he cares about you is a sign of insecurity. Take from that what you will.
I dunno...I love that my husband is "cheesy" with me, I think it's sweet and cute.....he makes me laugh and I just love it. I think he purposefully tries to find the most ridiculous cheesy lines in the world to say to me because he knows it will make me laugh.
At first I thought it was a little strange but, now I love it and I find corny things to say to him as well. It makes our relationship a lot of fun.
I almost thought this post was about me for a while.
The first few times my gf told me I was overdoing it hurt a bit - it was like you said, and also just embarrassing. It's like trying to perform a dance in front of an audience and then falling flat on your face.
I still do it from time to time, but I've learned not to take it too personally when she asks me to tone it down. He'll get over it; I did.
edit: I really don't think "You make my heart skip beats." is too cheesy, anyway. The phrasing is a little awkward, but honestly? Maybe he gets butterflies when he sees he has a call/text from you? That's not too unusual.
LOL, it's ironic because you'd think it'd be the other way around. My bf is the same way. Sometimes i'm a bit repulsive about it and he wonders why, but it's just because of how i am. While i'm trying to worry about the present, he has his head in the clouds.. thinking about marriage and what not. I understand where you're coming from. It's flattering AT FIRST, but it gets kinda old. I think it's a way for dudes to express their sensitivity since they always have to be MACHO MACHO for the fellas. Who knows? Haha
Oh my word have you been reading my txts lately? It's suuuuper annoying to have someone like that. (Especially when we aren't even dating and we've only known each other 2 WEEKS!!!!) I feel so bad for telling him to stop though because he's so insecure (but I did tell him that calling me his "princess" was to much and over the line.) My second boyfriend was like that as well. I view cheesy lines should be in doses like cheese (for me at least who isn't an avid cheese lover.) I like my meat sandwich with just a bit of spicy melted cheese, not an entire grilled cheese sandwich of the stuff. (Ok bad analogy but it works for me! lol.)
He needs a man slap. I have seen this before. Two of my coworkers and I got on a plane for two weeks of work in another state. As soon as we get on the plane they start acting like kittens and little puppies. It was sick. I could see a love fest brewing before my eyes. A few days into it she was finished with him and he was slobbering like a little twitty bird. I had to pull him aside and give him a big old man slap. Tell him his kahunas needed to drop back into place and straighten out the chest. He was a man and crying like captain sissy boy was disgusting.
It didn't work. He needed a man punch. But I didn't want to break anything so I spray painted wussy on his forehead.
When we got back home we all went our seperate way. When he stepped off the plane to meet his wife he wouldn't even kiss her. I really would have given him a man punch then but it was back when the airports had no security and the waiting areas still existed. The place was packed.
the past few guys i have been with are the same way. its ridiculous... i have been called insensitive and cold many times before by everyone that knows me. that being said, a person who is the opposite of me in that sense, is a headache. i would rather you SHOW me how you feel than tell me. like, i would rather you put a rose outside my door than read a 3 page text about the way my eyes glisten in the light. for me, chivalry is the way to go. but maybe thats just because im a jerk.
Nahh, it's ot you. & yeah I've been in a relationship like that.
xD hah we were at his apartment and he was about to drop me off. The sun was setting and we were 14 floors high, it was breezy,,, haha that musta gotten to him cz he said, "if you ever leave me, I'll jump off from this building."
o.O haha it ended in a month.
erm, not trynna jinx u or anything, jst sharing smth similar.. =]] i guess, just have fun while it lasts ;)
my boyfriend is actually exactly like that lol. we've been dating for almost two months and thats how he is ALWAYS. hes already told me he loves me and everything.
it bothered me a lot at first and it annoyed me but ive grown used to it. thats just the way he is. he likes to make me happy even if he is being over the top. i always laugh when hes cheesy so to him its just a way to make me smile.
i think you should just hope he'll tone it down a bit but also just try to get used to it. you never know what could happen between you two.
lol I dont think being overly cheesy has anything to do with ones devotion?? That's just me though. I'm personally cheesy at times too, but that's just the way how I feel at the moment. Maybe the other person is just clingy in nature?? Sounds like it.
Yeah, cheesiness starts to lose it's adorable factor after a while. It's best when it only happens enough to really make you say "Aw, that's so unlike him," therefore making it more special.
My boyfriend keeps cheese to a minimum and I like it that way.
the boy i've most recently started seeing is undeniably cheesy at times.
BUT he knows it, and usually follows his statement or text with "and that's how you know I'm gay".... or something equally as witty, and condescending to his sexuality. lol
last night he told me that my smile warmed his heart.
which is precious, but honestly, i'm much like you in that I'm not overly sweet and I'm very logcal... so, i was like.... uh dude?
haha.... yeah, i just don't know how to handle it yet. it's new....
keep complaining and then he will start treating you like crap and being sarcastic all the time.
you might prefer that, but i kind of doubt it.
my boyfriend is super cheesy. it doesn't happen all the time so it doesn't bother me. it's actually kind of nice.
My boyfriend can be but I would not call it cheesy, I personally find it cute and I love when he does it.. but he is like "Omg I am so sorry, that was cheesy" but I would be like no no no. I find it nice.
Cheesy is cute, even after two years of dating. Maybe you don't like him that much to begin with.
I'm the type of boyfriend that yours is. I am overly mushy. I say mushy things. I like to. I like to see her smile when I say something dumb like that.
I'd rather be overly mushy than stone cold steve austin about it, ya know?
It's only cheesy if the person saying it is being fake or doesn't genuinely mean it. I love when my boyfriend says overly romantic things because I know he really feels that way. It comes from the heart. And it always makes me smile. My favorite? ... he was saying that I make him really happy, and then he said, "I'd rather die than hurt you."
::cue:: "Awwwww" :)
I'm soooo mushy and overly devoted, but my boyfriend doesnt seem to mind too much. We've been together for over an year and he still hasn't complained. Â I wish he were a bit mushier sometimes.. but then again, maybe it's best this way.
it's just temperament. it sounds like he REALLY likes you. :) it sounds sweet, but to be honest, we sound like we have the same personality, lol, you and me. If I got that text, that's probably exactly what I'd say.
You're already doing everything we're supposed to do- communicate with him, ask him when to tone it down, and respond to his mushiness with characteristic honesty. I think you should just let him be happy and enjoy the fawning. :) don't worry...that stuff fades soon enough. Then you'll really find out what's going on, the true feelings underneath.
good luck. :)