Miss Reindeer The "rebound relationship" has a lot of negative connotations. People wonder if it's too soon, if you're confusing lust with love, if you're going to hurt the reboundee, etc. But I think if both people know where the other one stands, it's not that big of a deal. And that is where my new favorite person comes in.
"H" is probably the closest I've ever come to going on a date with a man who is my physical ideal. He's quite tall with shaggy hair and a bit of scruff on his face. He has a super sweet smile, a nice manly build and to top it all off he has an uber-sexy lip ring. Oh yeah, he has a southern twang in his voice that just makes me grin like a little schoolgirl. Yowza.
So after we met for the first time followed by texting/talking on the phone for a good week, we had our first date last weekend.
It was pretty textbook...movie, drink and a good old-fashioned make-out sesh before we each went home. And P.S., the lip ring was pretty hot. All in all, it was the perfect first date for what we are both looking for - NOTHING serious. Just a fling if you will. We'll be going out again soon, so I'm pretty stoked about that.
To me, a rebound is when a person jumps into something serious right away to replace what is now missing after a break up. That's never something I was after really. My friends keep calling "H" a rebound, but I'm not even sure he classifies as one since we both know and agreed that this isn't going anywhere serious. What do you think defines a rebound relationship? Is it a bad thing or a good thing? What happened with your rebound relationship?
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Comments (17)
I suppose if you both agree that it will be nothing serious then I do not see it as a "rebound." Both of you know going that it will not be a serious thing.
um, i thought a rebound relationship was when someone gets into another relationship to get over the previous one? i think that a rebound relationship isnt a great thing because it's unfair for the person you're using to rebound (the way i thought follow by the definition i thought)
& nope, no rebound relationship
Rebound means, by definition, to bound or spring back from an impact. A rebound relationship doesn't have to be serious. It's any kind of relationship at all. Whether you're playing around, serious, or none of the above. A rebound relationship usually occurs right after someone goes through a break up. Plus, you both agreeing that it's just for fun kind of proves that it's a rebound relationships. In the typical rebound relationship, the person on the rebound doesn't particularly open up the option of letting it get serious. They close themselves off from that avenue.
I don't think a rebound relationship is necessarily a bad thing, so long as both people understand that it's going nowhere. So long as no one gets hurt.
I've never been in a rebound relationship.
You can call it what you want, but to me it sounds like an excuse.
He may be your rebound guy, but who cares? Especially when you're both clear about what you want from each other. This is why I don't like labeling things. There's always some kind of connotation to a label and that connotation may not even be your intention. Then people make judgments about it. How annoying when it doesn't involve them. Also, not everything can be labeled good or bad. What may be good for one person may be bad for another, or it can just be. You know what I mean? Rebounding isn't bad per-se, depending on how you rebound. Going out with a person - not so bad. Having casual sex with multiple people - I don't want to say it's bad, but it can be quite dangerous. Don't fret yourself about whether seeing this current guy is good or bad. It just is and as long as he makes you happy, it's all good!
Funny enough, my rebound guy turned into my current boyfriend of almost 3 years. Isn't it funny how things work out sometime? I don't think we were looking for anything serious when we started either. Things just happened.
i honestly can say that it's not a bad thing to be on the rebound and just have fun and not let it get too serious. sometimes we take things too seriously and that's how people get hurt. it's good to just let your hair down and enjoy flirting with boys again.
I don't think it's a rebound... I agree that a rebound is putting your heart into someone to try to get over someone else. If you both know that it's not serious, I don't think it's a big deal. Personally I can't really date at all within a couple of months of a breakup because I will probably just compare the person to my ex.... But that's just me. Then again, I wouldn't necessarily say no if someone asked me on a casual date.
I accidently had a rebound after my first bf and i broke up (and it was a nasty one) it didnt work well.
hmm.. I ever experienced nor been into a rebound relationship.. and to be honest with you..it's really sucks .because the guy are too selfish and arrogant.. but we do make it together for almost 2 years and half..adn we decided to ended it up.. not because of the distance *(im in malaysia and he is australia)*..Well for both of us distance wasnt the problem.. but the trust of each other a bit problem here..but still not the main cause that made us separated..The main reason is my ex wanted me to have an equivalent qualifications ..ermm.. he is a solicitor and i must be like one of him too..it's not because i cant be one of it... just that i think that i dont want to be with a guy who only think about how he wants the partner to be perfect, intellectual..intelligent.....etc..
But girl, my advised to you is..just dont get ur self involve into a rebound relationship ..but im pretty sure not all rebound relationship are bad..
Always remember that whatever people think and have said and have to says about you..just ignore them all.. because your happiness doesnt rely or being decide by them BUT YOU..YOUR SELF!
aLL THE BEST....
It's that relationship you want to test the waters of, but don't see a future (or really hope for one) with right off the bat. I had one in the fall after coming out of a three-year relationship. He was just like the guy you're describing. Physically the most attractive guy I'd ever had around that was equally into me, fun, communicative, etc. But it was just that. I wanted to fall in love with him and get over my ex, but I knew it was never going to happen with how non-serious both of us were acting. He ended up being totally insecure and kind of a jackass. It only lasted one fun month and a few random hook ups around Christmas.
But as I posted earlier, my number rose to TWO, I learned a lesson, and am smarter now. I'm letting them come to me, and I'm not taking another number until they're in love with me to avoid another waste of time.
Nah rebound is when you use someone, seems like you both know you're just in it for a little fun.
Rebounds are necessary sometimes so that you can regain the confidence and self-esteem you might have lost due to your last relationship.
I have had rebound relationships, but they usually come after a very bad breakup. And I've had only 2 of those. I don't have a hard time getting attention so usually I will remain single until I'm ready to date again. But sometimes being alone is too much especially when you've been used to receiving physical attention.
i think it's a rebound. because you said that you want something to replace what was missing. that's totally a rebound.
I don't think it's a rebound. Sometimes, a person just needs to get out there & date around for fun without being serious in order to get over some of the pain of a break-up. It's nice, in a way because it keeps your mind off your ex.
I don't understand all this rebound rubbish. I was with my ex for 15 years and he cheated on me again,he thought he would stay with her,but she dumped him. One month after our break up he hooked up with an old school friend. They got engaged 3 weeks later, and a month later moved in together. Been together only three months. Tell me is this a rebound as she thinks he loves her and they are supposed to be getting married next year. You can't possibly fall for someone else that quick,so who is the desperate one,and will it last?.
@Fluxuater@xanga - agreed.
my suggestion is :NEVER fall in love with your rebound guy.That sucks...and hurts,also..