Fmylife.com contains short day-to-day life anecdotes. A simple recipe: in one sentence, each site visitor can tell the shitty moment which ruined his day. These short stories must begin with "Today" and end with "FML".
Here are our favorite five submissions from
F*** My Life this week:
Today, My girlfriend and I were watching TV, randomly she starts to undo my belt buckle, unzips my fly and then takes my pants off. Right as I'm starting to get really excited she says to me "Just Joking". FMLToday, cops showed up at my apartment demanding to look inside. Satisfied with the search, they told me they had received a noise complaint. More specifically, hearing screams someone believed a girl was getting raped. I had two friends over and we had been wrestling. The three of us are male. FMLToday, my boyfriend of 17 months, the first guy to tell me he loves me, the guy I lost my virginity to, the only guy whose parents I've met, told me we should stop 'hooking up' because it's weird that I was telling everyone we were a couple and it was ruining his chances of finding a girlfriend. FMLToday, as I got down on one knee, and was in the middle of saying "Will you marry me?", she answered a text message. Apparently it was more important. FMLToday, my boyfriend, and best friend, had baked a cake, and wouldnt tell anyone who it was for. When I asked he said I'd know soon. He met me after class to break up with me and offered me the cake to make me feel better. FMLloves them
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Comments (29)
All of these, Wow... But especially #3. Oy... that's gotta hurt.
#2, lmao.
Wow @ #3. He would be castrated immediately.
Here's one that I saw today that made me wanna die!!!
Today, my boyfriend was going down on me. Right as I was really getting into it, he pauses, frowns, and says, "I think I see the pee hole." FML
The last one is funny and so upsetting!
Cm ~
I remember seeing #3 and thinking that boy wouldn't live to get another girlfriend. And I haven't seen the last one this week is that new from this morning? haha
#1, 2, 4 had me cracking up. haha Just Joking, we were all males, Will you - *buzzz 'oh hold that though OMG! no she didn't Cathy!' ok babe what were going to ask me?" hahahaha
#3 & 5 are made me feel bad.
@kaybaby666@xanga - ROTFLMFAO that is horrible!!
lol its unfortunate that these FML stories just made my day better :oX
I cracked up on #2. Jeez. Must had been an ego blow.
Ouch.
LOL at #1. I laughed lots and lots.
Lmaooo. Funny stuff :P
Cake would make me feel better if someone broke up with me.
Holy crap.
The fml stories make me feel better about myself too.
all i can say is .. Ouch!
3 and 5 is sad.Â
@RazorBladeParade@xanga - but what if it from the one who broke up with you?
Wow on all of them, especially #3 and #5. Those were very sad. :(
ROFLCOPTER
Oh wow x(
If any of these were me, I'd be SCREAMING "FML!!!"
Number 5 was horribly ironic :/
Am I the only one who hates this FML thing?
@MzBrownEyez - ... it would still make me feel better. I'd pretty much be happy with cake, period.
wow. shows where society is now. lmaos esp at the last one xD