Tuesday, 14 April 2009
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Could You Tell When You Were Meant to Be?
Just about a month ago I ran into my best friend in middle school. It had been ten years since I'd seen him because he moved to another city when we started high school. We didn't keep in touch because his family pretty much up and left; we barely said good bye, but that's beside the point. So now we're 23, and I ran into him not too long ago at this lounge where my friends and I were chillin'. We saw each other and I recognized him but I wasn't too sure if he recognized me - I mean it's been so long. He did, and we started talking; by the end of the night we'd exchanged numbers. We went out to dinner to catch up, and it was fun; it was as if there was no ten year gap between us.Then things went downhill...we were texting each other, and in the midst of texting, I realized just how long it had been. We both tripped out about it for a minute, and then he told me that he used to have a crush on me when we were kids (cliché, no?). I thought it was cute because I'd had a crush on him, too. The thing about our past (why we never got together) was that I was always his go-to girl when he was having problems in his relationships; on top of that, he was going out with my friend (the unspoken rule comes into play here). She ended up breaking up with him, got with his friend, broke up with him, and tried to get back with him (classic middle school drama). Plus, she hated me when she found out that we talked every night. But that was all we were - friends. The feelings didn't start until we really started to talk more and it began to feel wrong to be talking to him so much.
So back to the present day, the thing that sparked our conversation that we're meant to be was our confession of having the same exact song for each other. I kid you not, it blew me away because he mentioned it first, and I'd told absolutely no one about this song back then - I'd just be made fun of, and we couldn't have that. So I asked him nonchalantly if the song just popped into his mind and he immediately replied with a 'no, why' and I told him because it was so ironic that it was the very same song for me.He was first to say that we're meant to be; I told him it was a crazy coincidence. Then he made the point that things like this don't happen on a regular basis, which is true, but I'm more of realist, so I wasn't going to jump and down and announce him as my prince charming. However, we've also confessed that there are feelings still lingering, but I've become so fed up with guys that I'm more hesitant and resistant. If this is going to be a good thing, I don't want to ruin it, but at the same time, I don't want to get hurt.
Is that worthy of noting that we possibly could be meant to be? Or is it just some crazy coincidence, because let's be real, it's been ten years we're not who we used be. Were you able to tell you and your SO was meant for each other? Has something similar ever happened to you?
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- From: MzBrownEyez
- Name: MzBrownEyez
- About Me: I use this time to vent, to contemplate and to find out if i'm over analyzing a situation. The writing is usually in the moment, so let me apologize in advance for any errors you will come across (lol), I'll fix them next time I'm on.. But more than likely my blog is screaming for an opinion other than my own, so feel free to comment. Other than that thanks for stopping by.
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Comments (53)
Now I'm curious what the song is..
@Gisele - same. whats the song.
I say go for it.
Might be, might not. With good friendships going to relationships there's always a risk. Some don't turn out, others do. I say go for it, because if you don't you might regret how perfect you might be for him, and vice versa.
My bf and I were good friends 4 years before we started to date. We put a priority on our friendship, and things couldn't be better. Almost 7 months and still going strong. I guess there were times when we realized we were made for each other, be it in personality similarities, hobbies we have in common, tastes in different rock metal bands (we both love rock metal music), etc. But for the most prominent way we know is that we have amazing communication. Always have been. We could talk for hours, and I've never had that kind of connection with any other guy before. Very different from previous bfs.
In any case, good luck.
I have to say am curious about the song too.
Anyways, you's could meant to be you's might not, it could be worth the risk if you take the chance, instead of asking what if, if you don't, sometimes it works sometimes it doesn't. You's might had a 10 year gap where you's never saw one another and might not be who you were then but if you's still get on great then thats a good start.
I'd like to think me and my boyfriend are meant to be. When I left school I joined a course that lasted a few weeks if I hadn't left early I would have met my boyfriend then but I left. Then I went to college and met this guy and went out with him who is my boyfriends best friend. (i know it sounds dodgy but he's kool with it) I met my boyfriend through him, and after we broke up, I still saw him about, and he was at a party one night and we just hit it off, and I checked his bebo a few times but was too shy to add him, I found out he done the same, then my mate had a party and he was there and thats when we realised we liked each other.
anyways good luck.
Although it's true that with friendships there's a risk, I don't see much of a risk here. You guys were fine for 10 years without each other and now your intentions aren't simply platonic. If you feel good and comfortable, go and give it a try. You never know what may happen =)
And yes, please tell us this song...
Get to know him first, don't rush it. Be honest with him, tell him that you're afraid of being hurt because you do have hopes for the two of you. You want to start slow.
He should understand that, while still being sure that you're interested in being with him.
communication, communication, communication. The three most important things in any relationship. ;)
Boys & Girls ....
Really Funny ......
If you like him, go for it. Don't base your decision on whether you guys were meant to be. Some relationships never develop because it wasn't the right place or time, like with you guys. Two coincidences don't amount to a fate written in the stars. Maybe three though. =P
Live it...
Time will tell (and take it slowly, u don't want to ruin this);)
i'm also curious of the song. And well while it might be nice to live in the past, try to see how things are right now. If you guys get along great, then go take the plunge. There's no harm in trying, because in life no matter what,you should always try. if not you'll sit there and wonder what if?
Meh, I was "meant to be" with a guy who hasn't even spoken to me in over four months.
well i think you would have to look at his personality, how/if he respects you, and his goals and aspirations in life and then look at your similarities and if they're all positive, go from there and see where things go...
We have a tendency of mistaking coincidence with destiny, and mistaking history for fate.
I can't stop laughing at the fact that everyone wants to know the song. I didn't even care til I read everyone else's comments. Now I wanna know, too.
And ya know, you should definitely give it a try. I don't mean jump right into it. Take a little time, see how well you get along. It sounds like you 2 would make a great couple, though.
@Romans_837@xanga - This. Exactly. To. The. Point.
Why the hell are people so fascinated with this ideology of somebody specific out there being your loved one? You don't know who it's going to be, as it can be anybody if you just stick with one person long enough, ANYBODY can love somebody as the couple works things together and get stronger as one unit.
Admittedly, time passed between you two and things have changed about yourself and him, but admit it, nostalgia played a part in your decision to go back to him. It could've been anybody else that shared your feelings or interests, but nostalgia played a huge factor into bringing you two together again.
It can be anytime, but I find it funny on some cases where a person's "soul-mate" was the first opposite sex person they put in the friend zone.
sorry the song will not be named, but thank you for the feedback everyone.
Could be a coincidence for a reason...... hhehehehe
Try it and see how it is... If it doesn't work out at least you now know how you two ever felt and you did try.... :D
Give it a try, you guys were in middle school. You two are adults now, let the past be the past.
@DarkButtercup94@xanga - i'm happy that you two are still going strong.
@StargazingSuzie@xanga - thats cute, and i'm happy that you're ex is cool about you getting with his friend. lol
@Spyder_V@xanga - exactly, it's not platonic which makes it more difficult to pursue coz now i have to pursue with much more caution.
@the_hidden_angel@revelife - communication is key. we had it in the beginning, but now it's getting shakey...
@jeweliette@xanga - okay three...how about when we first went out to eat. it was simply to catch up, and it wasn't awkward in any way. we spoke to each other as if there was no ten year gap between us.
@MissSmartHottie@xanga - no, i really don't. we're like the tortes and the hare right now..
@sweetNsour_dreamer@xanga - yea thats how i felt with i realized that.
@babyblue5201314@xanga - i see what you're saying, but be rest assured that i'm not living in the past. i was only sharing.
@jupiter312@xanga - if you're meant to be, then time will tell.
@sarahflorida1085@xanga - it is, except for one. but its too long to mention here.
@Romans_837@xanga - trust that i am not trying to make those mistakes.
@Fairywife@xanga - thank you.
@Eternal_Nocturne@xanga - you just answered your own question.. no one knows, that why their so fascinated because it can be anyone. and yes anyone can be the one if you put enough work, but if too much work is put into the relationship then a person is simply settling. It is true that nostalgia is a key factor because we didn't get together back then, though i wouldn't condsider a middle school relationship valid. Never the less, i am curious about how we it will turn out now that we're adults.
"It can be anytime, but I find it funny on
some cases where a person's "soul-mate" was the first opposite sex
person they put in the friend zone." - "love works in mysterious ways" LOL!
@madishka@xanga - yea i'm just scared that i'll lose a friend in the process.
@GaMeGurLsH@xanga - lol i just mentioned that to someone. i'm not hung up on the past, that was more for background information.
thanks
One can find it easier to pursue romantic relationships. Picture yourself with this guy after it works out. Feel how great it is to be with him and have that connection. Now look back at yourself and realize how worthwhile the risk was.
Personally, I think that seeking a romantic relationship after a platonic one has been established is more risky. You have little to lose and a lot to gain! =)
This is so cute. :]
I say don't rush into things. Become better friends first, as close as you were back then.
Good luck!
Sounds somewhat like my situation! My boyfriend and I dated when we were 19. We were friends for a year prior to that. Anyhow, we broke up a year later. We remained friends somewhat throughout the years. Well, 10 years later and many exes later (him and I), we got back together. I've always loved him, no matter what, and vice versa so it wasn't too hard when we got back together. We've learned a lot along the way and matured as well.
You never know what will happen in love. Good luck!
You can't tell if you're meant to be with someone forever. Just take it one step at a time. If you like him, go for it. If not, stay friends. Everything can change in a blink of an eye. Just live life for now; not for the future.