Monday, 09 March 2009
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Happiness Is Realizing That We Cannot Be Sublimely Happy All the Time
...we are human after all. I do realize that happiness takes real effort and sheer willpower. But there are parts of being human that we cannot shy away from, like the pain of heartbreak or the misery of losing a loved one.
I was talking with my friend this evening, and she was feeling incredibly down because the person she loved fell in love with someone else. And miraculously, this thought just came to me and I just blurted it out: "Even brokenness is part of being whole," I told her. And it was like I was saying it to myself too. I had been in the same position countless times, and hearing me speak it reassured me in some way.
Somehow, it feels as though me being okay with getting hurt meant that I was validating my human existence, by allowing myself to feel life in its absolute wholeness. Not just the happy laugh-out-loud parts, but even the kick-you-in-the-crotch-spit-on-your-neck moments. Because being human doesn't mean being invincible. It means being able to withstand hurtful things and then getting up and trying to live again anyway. What could be more beautiful than that?It made me happy to think that I had gotten to that truth all on my own.
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About the Author
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- From: happilylost
- About Me: I want to relish every part of the journey! Even the parts when I'm lost.
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Comments (36)
That's exactly what I needed to hear right now. Thank you.
Finding the answers has a way of feeling like that =)
I remember a few summers ago, when I was considering how all of my friends had issues with relationship, I just started laughing. I understood. Sometimes the best things in life can't come without the worst things. If you cut off the extremes, you cut them off from both sides.
Yup.
I agree with what you're saying. But I think reaching for happiness to begin with, is a farce - because that is contingent on experiences. Joy or contentment, on the other hand, are not. You're right, we can't always be happy - and we shouldn't try to be, because this is just setting ourselves up to fall. Learning contentment or joy is so much harder - but ultimately more realistic, I think.
that's very true. life is about feeling different emotions. after all, there will be no ups in life if there are no downs. you simply can't appreciate happiness if you haven't been down before.
Props!
I guess...
Mmhm. We can't define or feel happiness if we don't have anything else to which we compare, right?
=]
i agree.
That is a universal truth I am glad you learned that. Life isn't about happiness. Learn to deal with sadness and make it happiness one day.
Thanks, I needed to hear that too. I recently broke up with my boyfriend (it hasn't even been a month) and I'm still kinda hurt, but I try not to let it show.. I know keeping it inside isn't good either.
You're right though, we can't always be happy all the time, so being human is feeling all kinds of emotions and getting through them, one day at a time. I guess I have to take one day at a time- right now it still hurts.
Epiphany five! People seem to think that happiness can be achieved by getting everything you want, and obviously their wrong. The more you have the more you want, the less happy you are. Their should be a science of happiness... joyology or something like that...
Funny, i was just complaining to my friend about being in that situation. This really helped.
You're right. I, too, needed to hear this.
What is happiness but a reversal of sadness? For without sadness, no one would know what happiness is ;)
I agree with you. I've have fallen many times but I continued and will continue to stand up no matter what. Kudos to those who feels the same.
Don't let the past poison the future and continue with each second that pass you by. =D
-xTeeN
AMEN!
You basically just summed up what I have been trying to communicate for years to my friends and family. And for that I thank you ^_^
"What could be more beautiful than that?" Nothing. I'm glad you had such a powerful moment & could share it with a friend!
Wow - you totally summed up my weekend! My heart was broken, but I was pleased with myself for discovering that I learned something: I could face my fears and pain, and was still not destroyed. Great post!
Often times, no matter how confused/troubled/bothered/etc. you are, chances are that you already know the answer to your problems subconsciously and haven't consciously acknowledged it yet. It's only when you need to help others or through lots of searching that you'll find that you had that answer all along.
you're right..
This post is very deep. I love it!
But yes, the way that humans feel a full spectrum of emotions is probably what makes us intrinsically humane. Therefore, in a sense, feeling sadness is quite normal, just as normal as it would be to feel happiness. Kudos.
yes i love this post too, its deep and true
=)
Wow thank you, so well put. I really needed to hear that right now :) Awesome post