Who knew?
He chased me for three months - calling me, texting me, buying me dinner, fixing my dad's car, taking me to the movies, etc...and it was all for nothing. He knew how I felt (I was honest with him from the beginning), but he ignored my statements and kept at it. It annoyed me, honestly, but after a while he started to grow on me and I kind of liked the fact that he thought about me often enough to call me all the time.
But I really didn't want to date him, so I finally, directly, bluntly told him I wasn't interested. And now he hasn't called in almost a week. And I'm actually kinda sad about it. I mean, I thought maybe we'd still be friends...but I guess I don't blame him.
Do you ever like the attention more than the person?
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Comments (42)
hmm...i think i would feel very guilty if somebody i wasn't interested in showed me that much attention. i would feel that i should do nice things for him in return.
so i guess no...i never liked the attention more than the person
although i can see why that is hard to turn away. since u told him from the beginning that u weren't interested, he can't really blame ya. maybe later on, u guys can be friends.
I think there was one instance where i liked the attention more than the guy
but he's probably hurt
give him some time and see what happens
Of course. Who wouldn't want the attention from not one but a few people who find you attractive whether you like them or not.
It's flattering when a guy buys you dinner even after you have blatantly rejected him. It's happened to me a couple of times. Some guys are just too damn persistent.
Hey it's not like I didn't give him fair warning that his heart would be broken in the end.
Hm. If I didn't like a guy in that kind of way, I wouldn't mislead him or still let him do all those stuff for me. I would tell him to stop. I don't want you to take me to the movies. I don't want to go to dinner with you. I don't want you to fix my dad's car. Etc. Allowing him to do all those things for you even after you told him that you didn't feel the same way, kind of, sort of, gave him hope to keep on doing it.
But no, I never liked the attention more than the person. It'll be better if I liked the person and the attention he gave me. It just gives me the creep when a guy is constantly giving me attention and doing things for me when I just don't want him to.
From an objective stand point, you actually did give him false hope, no matter you gave him warning or not... If I were you, as a girl, I would go for dinner with him, but not buying me dinner.
Guys often think that if they're paying for the dinner, they would consider it is a date.
As of right now, give him some time, he just needs to cool himself down a bit.
nevr judja buk by itz kover
& nevr looka gyft horse in the mouth
I just went through a situation almost like this one. After one of my guy friends found out that I was single again, he decided to make his move. I told him from day one that I had just gotten out of a relationship, just wanted to be friends & nothing else. But, he kept persisting! I found it very very annoying.. but also kind of flattering to think that someone was interested in me. Finally, after a few weeks, he decided that we wouldn't "work out anyway" and then decides that it's better for us to be friends (but we weren't even dating in the first place). We talk occasionally but not as often as we did when he wanted to date me.
Happens to me a lot. I almost always like the attention more than I like the guy. I usually just get bored of them and stop talking to them.
well apparently, you weren't being direct enough, else he wouldn't have stayed so persistent. he probably feels led on. isn't it common sense to not accept all that attention if you don't like the guy? you really did, in a sense, lead him on.
I'm an attention whore... simple enough. i'll admit it. and i feel bad b/c at the time i KNOW i'm only interested in the attention and i end up hurting them in the end. i never let it get serious and i never "mess around" with them if my heart isn't in it.... usually my flings only last from 2 weeks to a month...
Sorry to say it but it sounds like you were just using that guy. You said at first that you were honest but he ignored it and kept on and then you bluntly, directly told him you were not interested. You should of done that at the very beginning, we men don't like to play games its either you're interested or not. Despite popular belief we men do have feelings.
Yeah but I got over it in a day. It's probably the simplest thing to get over
yes that has happened to me a few times...
I do like attention from other guys (even if they are not my type) because it just gives me a boost of confidence. I think every person likes a little bit of attention from the opposite sex. But what you did kind of went too far... I would have told him sooner that I was not interested.
Mm, I i do like the attention but the guilt gets to me. On several occasions guys feel like they're being lead on, but honestly i'm just a friendly person. I'm extremely naivie when a guy likes me =\. However, when i like a guy i ignore every other guy and attention form the opposite gender just gets annoying lol. But yeah, that guy is probably really hurt. Even though he knew upfront that you weren't interested in the beginning. But, probably because you let him do the things for you that he did, he most likely had a little hope that you would have at least felt something. Give it some time and see what happens i guess.
yeah, it happens.
YES! I had the reaction from a female who I went out on a date with - she said she really wanted to be friends but I think in the long run it was too confusing and stressful so she kinda ignores me. She always says she is busy or sounds busy and rarely answers my messages. She will answer my text messages sometimes but it is always vague and "I am busy" again. I decided to cool it for a while. I decided not to call her for a month or message her to ask her how things are. In a month I may call her or just decide to try for another month. If she is not really willing to be friends then why should I? Part of me wishes she would call just to say hey but another part knows it may be for the best. But I am totally about to post a blog about all of this in a day or two so I will stop here.
Woooah thats going on with me right now...
This guys is trying to put all my attention on him. Its annoying the hell outta me. Even though he knows how i feel, he keeps going. Wish he would stop.ÂNo. I never like the attention more. I like neither..
@lmflazyjai1984@xanga - Because they buy dinner they consider it a date?!?!?!?! If i buy a guy dinner doesnt mean I'm taking him on a date!
Oh sweet attention. I understand, sometimes it's like they give you so much attention that it's hard to just ask them to stop after you've established that friendship, but in the end you can't blame yourself if they keep insisting. Everything has its limit though...and once that attention is gone somehow you're gonna start missing it.
Sometimes it feels like attention can become an addiction, give you a little in the beginning - not that bad. Then as you get farther along you start thinking - you're used to it. Sooner or later you're too deep in the hole but hey, just my opinion. Haha, complicated. =P
I love attention from guys even if I'm not interested, as long as he's the asshole, womanizer type. I feel no need to feel guilty because of his personality and character, and plus, it's somewhat rewarding to get to push away the guy who can (or thinks he can) get all the girls.
If it's a sincere guy, though, I'll feel either bad for him or creeped out, and either way, I'll pretty bluntly tell him to stop because I'm not interested in him that way.
yes definitely. i liked the attn they gave me but didn't like the guy. just gotta get over it i guess. or give him time to let go before being friends again.
I was in a similar situation, only she never told me her feelings and stopped talking to me when she started dating another guy. It doesn't feel good to be used, for attention or otherwise. You should have told him you were thinking more of a friendship instead of just telling him you didn't want a relationship and letting him to continue to buy you things.
I'm sure you wouldn't like it if the situation were reversed, or expect to provide a friendship.
I think its great you told him how you felt and you shouldnt be down about him leaving you alone i know you liked the attention but that would be leading him on and that wouldnt be fair. I dont think i could deal with someone calling me all the time and doing things for me because if i dont like them then that kind of stuff would get on my nerves so i would have been happy if he left me alone after i told him how i felt.
@chickadee09 - depends on situation... but most of the time guys will think that way...
Been there done that. That really sent my habit of wanting attention all the time, packing. A good chunk of it at least.