Tuesday, 17 February 2009
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Is It Worth Getting Involved for Only A Little While?
I recently met this awesome guy to potentially date. The thing is, he's only here in my town for another semester, and then he's going back home after he's graduated college.I don't know if I want to get involved or not for the time being that he is here considering that circumstance. I can't for the life of me stand long distance relationships, and I'm pretty sure I would fall for him if he decides to stick around and then would be completely devastated when he leaves.
What should I do for the time that he is here? I have no idea what to do.
Is it worth inevitable heartbreak if you know someone isn't going to be around for very long if you know you don't want to have an LDR?
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Comments (59)
Up to you. Do you think it's better to have Loved & lost or not Loved at all? Or something like that. I would take it, at the very least if it doesnt work out between the two of you guys, you guys will still share that awesome semester together and have fond memories of each other. I'd totally get involved!
Maybe he's not Mr. Right, but he could be Mr. Right Now. If you like him then date him, there is nothing wrong with that. Sometimes Mr. Right Now can become Mr. Right, even at a distance. That's what happened to me
Have fun, that's what i'd do. Enjoy the time while you have it.
go for it
A part of me says take the opportunity and spend whatever time left you had with him than not at all.
Another part of me says just let it be and move on. It will save you a lot of heartache later.
Just go with the flow and see what happens. :)
I personally wouldn't. Because I'm overly sensitive and would grow too attatched.
But who says a LDR isn't in the works?
However, be careful with your heart in this one: it sounds like it has a lot of potential for hurt.
And on another hand, why don't you just try becoming great friends with him, and see how it moves? A great friend for casual dates is fine now and then if you're not really in the dating 'pool' yet. Just make sure to watch your attachment level so you can make good decisions.
I'd prefer an un-broken heart at the close. So I would run like he had the plague... and not even touch on the idea of having a relationship. But hey, this is me... and I'm a cynic when it comes to opposite sex interactions. So... maybe you'd have more luck. But from what you've shared, the odds are not in your favor - so do you like to gamble?
It depends on what you want, really. For me, I like to make it clear with a guy that what we have is a potentially long term relationship or just a fling so neither one of us gets the wrong idea and gets too hurt with the outcome.
If it were me, I probably wouldn't try to get involved (though I'd still end up staying interested). That's because I'm not the type to regret things. Some people decide not to take a chance and painfully wonder, "What would have happened if I took a chance with him/her?" But I don't do that. If nothing happens, then nothing happens. You can try if you don't think you'll get too attached. If you're looking for fun, go for it. But if you're looking for a lasting relationship, it's probably not worth your time.
Life is short..carpe diem?
Do what your heart desires and you'll never have to wonder "what if". Anyway, if you're already quite interested in this boy, you'll be drawn him no matter what your brain tells you.
Depends on how you see it. If you wish for it to happen to have to be prepared to experience loss. If it doesn't happen at all you're left thinking "what if". Either way works.
It's up to you. Is it worth the risk to you or not? You may end up really falling for eachother and making it work, or it could all be for naught. It's really up to you whether you want to give it a shot.
If you know it's not gonna work out - whatever! Have a little fun. What's the worst that can happen? And hey, it might work out! Just don't get too attached (if that possible) and let yourself have fun.
i'm a stickler for serious, long-term, it's-going-somewhere relationships. if it were me, i would try my best not to start something that will end so quickly.
do you want to look back and think "what if?"
are you the kind of girl who can get a boyfriend easily (in other words, "bounce back" quickly?)
if so, then go for it.
i'd get involved at a distance, but i tend to have people at an arm's length away any...but then my hopeless romantic side says, go for it! what if he happens to be that perfect person that makes you want to try an LDR or what if you end up being the one that makes him want to looks for jobs around the college area?
Stay friends, the semester will be over quick. Unless, you want a quick Mr.Now then Mr.Right go ahead. The only heart you will be crushing is yourself.
My boyfriend and I began dating under similar circumstances. We had 2 semesters though, instead of just one. But I'm just now coming to terms with the fact that come May, he graduates and I stay at school. and there's a good chance I'll lose him. It's likely he'll be working at our college, and if he does, dating a student is a huge no-no. and if he's not working for the school, he's considering joining some kind of military force and being very far away for very long amounts of time. and knowing that we're getting ever closer to the end is scary.
am I saying it's not worth it? no, that's not what I'm saying at all. during the time we've had together, where we could be together, I've been happier than I've ever been before. and i wouldn't trade it for the world. although it hurts now knowing that likelihood and is going to get worse as time progresses, I wouldn't change it for the world.
Sure, date him for a little while. Just don't get too involved.
If he's interested, he's probably thinking the same thing. He hopes, yet knows it might not last. I find myself in his position as you find him, in terms of graduating soon. Talk to him, and at least let your feelings be known, even if it turns out you can't be dating.
I did it.
I don't regret it.
It was good while it lasted.
Then it sucked in the moteher fucking end.
I think you should do whatever you think is right. But, I would try to get to know the guy, don't rush into something right away but maybe see if there's enough chemistry there that might withstand a long-distance relationship. But, it's up to you..
Better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all. I know it sucks being on the receiving end of this saying, but I think it's true. And hey, maybe the two of you could work things out =].
You should go for it :) If it works, then it works... if it doesn't... then it doesn't. But if you really like this guy, and he really likes you, then I see no reason why you shouldn't date. Like others have said, he might be worth the long distance relationship if you find that you really are meant for each other. That's the hopeless romantic in me speaking :) It sucks when someone you really like doesn't want to try something because one of you is leaving (I've been doing the military thing, so I know how it goes). He might want to try and you might too :)
If you really like this guy and end up falling for him does distance really matter? Truth of the matter is you have to decide whether or not you want to be in the LDR. If you don't like the idea of being in a LDR, then don't. But if you would like to be in one, hopefully because you find that he's worth it, then go for it. Good luck.