Miss FoxI normally do not rant about relationships. It's generally my philosophy to let people do their thing, so long as it's not painful to them. And I get that we all want to be the cheese to someone's macaroni, and the hot dog to someone's bun... but online dating services really need to STOP. What happened to just
waiting until you meet that special someone?
My issue begins here:
Every day I watch TV, I see at LEAST ten commercials about an online dating service - especially eHarmony.com and Match.com. Now don't get me wrong, I understand that someone may be too busy to go out to a bar every weekend and wait for Mr. Right. But what happened to the idea of a meet cute? You know, where you're jogging in the park with your dog and your dog gets free, running over a handsome man who ironically is also walking his dog, thus forcing you two to meet? And what happened to high school and college sweethearts? Does every couple between the ages of 17 and 24 inevitably break up?
I want the romance back! I want to hear stories about how the future Mr. and Mrs. met, as long as it doesn't revolve around filling out a seven page survey about yourself in hopes to find your significant other.
Now I know that I'll probably get more than a handful of people who disagree with me on this and say that it's "unrealistic" to meet Mr. Right anymore...but I guess I have to say that I have a little faith in the idea of love. I'm not living in a fairytale. I know it's not always easy, and of course it's not always right, but do we have to resort to meeting someone through an imaginary, computer matchmaker?
And it's not just me, people! I'm not the only one that has issues with these kind of services. Check out what Time Magazine had to say about eHarmony.com when they printed their "Five Worst Websites" article. (
Article.)
Is online dating forcing people together, or do you think that it's giving people the opportunity to meet their soulmate when they might not have met otherwise?
(As a sidenote, out of curiousity during the sixth airing of an eHarmony commercial, I actually visited the site and filled out the survey (c'mon, it was free!). To my surprise, there was
actually a question on one of the pages of the survey that asked, "How important are looks to you? How important is it for your match to be good-looking?" I think it even asked a question about how good-looking you would rate yourself!
At least they're not forgetting that relationships aren't just all about shared interests!)
Comments (61)
I think they are there to provide people that either need help, have given up, or would like a constant search tool in order to find someone right for them.
I'm sure that there are still a lot of people out there who still find their Mr./Ms. Right by letting their dog loose at the park =P
yes.
It's both: it's a convenience, and today's society is geared towards complete convenience and minimal effort, hence the online dating services. The Internet is the ultimate resource, after all.
Plus, the media and Hollywood has helped to promulgate certain stereotypes about the course a relationship needs to run and how people are able to meet "at random". Thus, people go out into the real world and have unreasonable expectations about how they can find the right person for them.
At the same time, people's experiences mean that they are less likely to find the right person for them by going out to bars and clubs: the atmosphere and clientele aren't exactly conducive to meeting the right person for you. Thus, people are almost forced to move into the online realm.
Highschool and college sweethearts DO still exist: I'll be one of the lucky few. however, in today's consumeristic society where things are easily discarded for the latest, best, new thing this attitude as entered our relationships and we're seeing more and more relationships break down as people think that there is something better just around the corner.
In sum, I dont think online dating "pushes" people together, rather it just creates opportunities that might otherwise be lost. It is almost a last resort, but also an option that takes much of the guesswork out and can be an easier way to judge someone than the front presented out in public.
Sorry for the length of this, I hope my points got across...
It's more convenient, but I don't think I'd ever resort to it.
If it helps certain people, why not?
You can run through the park with your dog for as long as you like..but does that gurantee you will meet the man of your dreams?
And going to bars? ..perhaps eharmony is a better way..for many people.
no
prezuming you keep it on lyne it duz however force fikshunz together
I think that online dating sites are perfectly okay. nobody can force anybody to be with anybody!!
you have to think... if you meet somebody at the bar -- who have they picked up from that same bar or a different one the weekend before?!
Also, I think that online dating sites create friendships as well. People meet on blogging and networking sites all the time and create friendships with one another...if it doesn't work out between the two from the dating sites... who knows- a friendship could at least be created. sometimes things just aren't meant to be.
When I wasn't married yet, it was hard to find a decent guy. I met the majority of my exes through friends or people who know people.
Then I also met some great guys on the internet through forums, blogging websites, or chatting rooms. It wasn't my intention to go online and met them but I did.
I came close to marrying one of them. And then, I eventually married one.
Regardless if you meet them online (intentionally or not) or in reality, hey, whatever works for you. I think online dating services is a great opportunity for some people who have given up on love or those who don't have the time to go out and look for love.
Online dating is an option that you have a choice of making regardless of how many commercials you see. Like McDonalds, car and other advertisments, people have choices.
I don't think online dating in general forces people together. When someone signs up, they pay money for those websites to hook them up.
I think it's fine. It helps people find love. [:
It's perfectly fine.
I think these "online dating websites" are created not only for people to find their soulmates but also for people to meet new people, like u said some people might be too busy to go out to a bar every weekend, and maybe they just want to enhance their social network and this is where these websites come in.
I personally think that it doesn't matter where u find your SO or how you meet ur SO, its just important on how compatible and in love you are.
and what if the person you meet online is a creep and kidnaps you or something?? ..what now?
I do somewhat feel like it's pushing people together, I have signed up for a few but i refuse to may for any subscriptions. I feel i'm too young to be desperate enough to find someone that i have to pay to have someone match me up. My reasons for using an online site is that I was in a serious relationship (we were high school sweethearts) we got engaged planning to get married after i finished school and then he dumped me after 3.5 years for someone else (that something better). The whole time we were together he was my life and i basically abandoned all my friends (i know that was stupid) so i was left alone with no friends, enrolled in the nursing program at a community college, leaving me with very few opportunities to meet any guys, other than hoping some guy would approach me while i'm out with my mom or sister, the only people i ever go anywhere with. Not to mention i'm not the type of girl most guys go out of their way to talk to. So for now i'm just going to let things happen as they will and have settled on the idea that i'm probably going to be alone, but alone is better than desperate.
definitely agree with you
@baconlicious112@xanga - What if you meet someone in a bar who's a creep and kidnaps you? What now?
@MusingsOfAnAlmostSocio@xanga - What if you and your online friend decide to meet in a bar..? What now?
I think that online dating can be good. So is REAL dating, but I can't really choose between one. I guess that sometimes, under some circumstances, it can be just as good to find someone online as it is in person. Unless, that person online that you think is a tall, sexy guy ends up being a short, butch female. You never know!
I met my husband online. But, I wasn't looking for love. I was 11 and he was 10. We met, I guess you could say "accidentally", in a POKEMON chatroom. We kept in contact from back then all the way until now. We spent about 10 years just roleplaying (like, "I'M BULBASAUR AND YOU'RE PIKACHU"), and as we grew older.. talking about everything in the world and everything about each other, and finally met May, 2007. Married a year later.
THAT WAS SOME SERIOUS E-DATING.
I think online dating is okay and that it doesn't force you to be with someone. If you want to find love, you go looking! Whether it be at a park, movies, online, you name it. :3 My problem is that if I meet someone online and we were dating, I'd like to be close to him. Not 23,000 miles away...I don't like long distance relationships...too hard, for me anyway. :P
@retardedlypretty@xanga - That is one cool story about how you met your husband!~ :3
Well you know what i dont think you are living a fairytale about people meeting in highschool and college and staying together as soul mates, it still happens its just people stopped paying it any attention. Women now of days just want sex from men because they feel that they cant be faithful, and we rather just sleep with them and go away so we wont get hurt!
The online thing. I think its ok if it works for someone. You are never to busy to go and meet someone, just online dating is easier. You go to their page and read things about them and if u dont like it u go to the next. Instead of in the real life of getting to know someone and liking them for flaws that you might not like, and taking that chance. You never know when someone is your soulmate!
@Amailie@xanga - Thanks, sweetie. :)
I wouldn't do online dating...
@baconlicious112@xanga - Buy mace. Or cayenne pepper. Or learn how to do a dragon punch. Why do I suddenly have a craving for bacon?
@retardedlypretty@xanga - EXPLOSION OF AWESOME!