Miss Double ShotThe boyf reminded me recently that when we first started going out, I was never willing to stay out past 7 p.m. - I told him flat out that I had to go home and watch American Idol. Somehow, we are still dating, probably because he's wonderful and we're in the Idol off-season (until tonight!).
He said he didn't mind that I set that sort of ultimatum because it showed that a) I wasn't going to bullshit him on why I was unavailable; b) I wouldn't be the clingy type who always had to be available all the time; and c) I cared about things that were important to me.
Looking back on it, it was a total jackass move on my part - who does that?! - but it all worked out for the best, so phew. And I think we might be able to watch it together at some point this season - that is, if he promises not to talk except during the commercials.
Have you ever set boundaries or time limits right away on a date? How'd it go?
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Comments (39)
If I had a date scheduled for tonight American Idol could go hang.
If you have limits you want honored it's better to get them out in the open! If you truly want to watch American Idol that much then it's a good thing you told him up front. Personally, there aren't any shows I would skip a date for since I usually watch them online anyways.
I would never set limits on a date. That ruins the fun and plus I'm old enough to say anything goes, who knows where the date may go or how long it will last. Honestly, I wouldn't have had some of the best and craziest moments of my life if I told a guy that I needed to be home by a certain time. That would be such a buzz kill.
Not for AI but I have for SYTYCD and Grey's Anatomy
I almost bailed on the first time going to meet my boyfriend because Gilmore Girls was on. It's two years down the road, and I'm glad he invited me to watch it there with him.
He and I set Thursday nights aside to watch Grey's Anatomy together every week, he was skeptical but he watched it with me and now he's hooked.
Anything > American Idol.
I set limits like, "If you call me at x PM, I will NOT answer, 24 or something else I like is on," but otherwise, my boy is way more important.
Errr, the only time I set a time limit on a date is when I have to go to work in the morning. Ha, I jest. Sorry, I couldn't resist saying that. Um, no time limits on dates for me, but it's not so bad to have priorities. If something else was ALWAYS a priority, though, with no compromise... I'd say that's a red flag. Unless it was something truly compelling and time restrictive, like visiting hours at a retirement home after she gets off work. I could understand that.
Lol it was such a jackass move, I think, that he probably thought it was actually really cute. (That only works for girls though lol.) For me though, I've never set limits/boundaries on a date... I always feel lucky to have them lol. But I can totally understand what you mean!
I go wid da flow. Whatever happen, happens.
Yep, but that was because I really didn't want to be going out on one-on-ones with him haha. I don't regret those instances at all. :P Plus, it eliminates the:
"uh...well, I think I should be going now."
"Really? Awww why, we were having so much fun...." etc.
Mm, no, you were.
i used to leave my ex's house early every monday night to go home and watch jon and kate plus 8. haha, it pissed him off but during football season we'd also never hangout on sundays during the giant's game. so really, i see no problems with those kinds of time limits or boundaries at all. especially if you're comfortable enough with the person.
hehe, our date IS watching american idol! she's right next to me!
I dont think there would ever be anything on tv that I would choose over my date.
except maybe an edward norton film :]
but in that case they would watch it with me anyways<3
i refuse to go out before 7pm.
i always set time limits when stuff like that happens.
the way i see it is that if he cares enough he'll a) respect or b) join me =D
I don't give up doing anything for tv. Nowadays everything is online anyways.
American Idol?!?!?!
You've got to be kidding me. I feel bad for that guy. He can't talk at all during the show? At all?
Wow.
I don't do that. I mean, sure, there are things that I don't particularly want to deal with, but if I know a guy is going to have a problem with it, then I usually don't bother with them, because I don't want to make them put up with something they couldn't care less about.
I set boundaries like I don't kiss on the 1st date. This one guy broke that and needless to say there wasn't a 2nd date.
No boy is more important than House, M.D.
I've set limits with my boyfriend like he can't call the house after nine and he can't just come over unannounced. We've set limits as to how intimate we'll get, but I don't recall setting limits on something like American Idol. Although, it is good you were honest up front with him about your desire to watch American Idol, and he respects that wish. Ok maybe it is a stupid limitation but it goes to show you that he values you as a person and is willing to respect you. He sounds like a keeper!
It's just TV...you miss an episode, you miss an episode...No big deal. I mean there will always be re-runs (most likely not right away, but they will come) and most of the time you can get them off the internet or something. *shrugs* I personally wouldn't have done it, but eh...others aren't me.
But yes there are those boundaries like:
No sex on the first date or more, until it feels "right"
No racial jokes
Etc.
You know the most common ones that MOST people have...I don't really have any "unusual" boundaries.
Well... nothing comes between The Office and me on Thursday nights. With the ex, we both watched it. Now, if he doesn't, I don't care. I do not miss The Office, and it seems to be chill with the male crowd.
It's interesting that you ask about setting the boundaries. Ever since my parents stopped giving me a curfew, the boundaries have been gone on time.
I dont watch American idol and the date will be more important.
I have never been on date but there will be boundaries.
I remember when Make Me a Supermodel was airing, I told my friends that I need to be back before 7:30pm so I could watch it. : P
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