Saturday, 03 January 2009
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I Think My Ex-Boyfriend Is Gay
This is a guest blog submitted by itslovemakeithurt0.I am convinced that my ex might be gay. There are many reasons why I might think this:
People who don't really know him have asked me if he was gay. They said things like, "he seems very feminine" or "I just got that vibe."
When we were together, he had man crushes on celebrities and rock stars. Don't get me wrong, he did mention things about Jessica Alba from time to time, but when it came to the guitarist of his favorite band, he would call him "beautiful" and "sexy".
And let me add his low sex drive. I felt abnormal in the relationship because he was so distracted with other things that I felt I wasn't getting enough!
Also, he has tons of friends that are girls and now that he's single, he still just wants to be friends with all these chicks. He goes to a different school than I do now, and he has been making a lot of new friends - a lot of them are gay men.
What do you thing guys? I am just making up excuses? Have you ever been in a situation where you felt like your ex was gay?
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- From: ItsLoveMakeItHurt0@xanga
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Comments (86)
My ex-boyfriend is gay. It's no big deal. We all knew it. He's my bestie.
Those are signs that he could be, but from just those signs I wouldn't say 100% that he is. My ex had similar signs but he also had a stash of gay porn in his closet. If I were to guess, I would say that he is either bi or possibly just curious about gay men.
im kind of wary about my exes being gay too. my one ex-boyfriend wasn't really interested in me, and shaved his legs >.i guess it doesnt really bother me now since ive discovered my "gay personality." id say dont take it too hard on your ex if they are gay, because ive been there, and all my ex-boyfriends make fun of me for it.
Girl, what did you do to that boy?
He might be. If you're on friendly terms with him, why don't you just ask?
I think my ex is gay. But I think he's so deep in the closet he's finding Christmas presents. He's a Christian, and a homophobe, and I don't think he'll ever admit to it. Oh well.
Have you asked him? I agree with the rest. Indicators, yes. Only way to know is to ask. *shrug*
Oh, and with guys there's a LOT less of a grey area than with girls. A girl once posed the same question "is he gay" to me and she said she'd show me his facebook picture. I told her a picture doesn't mean much, but sure, why not, I'll look, right? It was a picture of him kissing another guy (on the lips). I looked her dead in the eye and said "yeah, he's gay". But as in all cases, gay can also mean bi, but at LEAST gay. The same does not apply to girls. There are exceptions, but if a guy has gay porn? Kisses guys? Yeah, he's gay or bi. No way around it.
uhm... he's your ex. so frankly... who cares? even if you're still friends, does it matter if he's straight or gay?
If he is...no big deal, especially since he's your ex. Maybe you could ask. From what you told us it seems pretty obvious, though.
Looking back on it...I think my first crush from elementary school might be gay...but I haven't seen him since fifth grade so who knows.
Classic tactic. Make women believe you're gay and gain their confidence. Then bang them. The downside is that in the process you may discover you are a flaming homosexual, as your ex-boyfriend appears to be. It's possible that he's just effeminate. I have man-crushes few and far between, but I'm not gay. It's more of a jealousy of being that person more than anything else. The solution here is: What does it say on his facebook profile?
@death_by_chocolat@xanga - Oh Kayla! :)
Since I KNOW it's going to come up, why is there a double standard? Simple. Testosterone/Masculinity is an exclusive trait. Estrogen/Femininity can be shared. What I mean is that the standard for manliness and being a MAN puts you alone. The standard for femininity can be shared and expanded when you put several females together. Therefore women being intimate with other women does not violate femininity...
Flamingly gay. You've got magic powers :D
I think you shouldn't care. He might be bi.
I actually kind of think that my current BF may be gay. :x
He's the straightest guy I'll ever know.
I still wonder the same thing about my most recent ex... our relationship ending with him cheating on me over the internet with a girl, but that was because she wanted to talk about anal sex when I wouldn't do it. There were so many signs that I never read. And if he's gay (as I suspect) he's screwing everything he can to cover it up. The only thing is that they are all underage intoxicated girls, which I'm guessing never remember him trying to get it up for them in the morning.
Sorry, I am obviously still super bothered by this.
I would definitely think you're on to something. And it's probably fine that he's gay... but he should try and open up about it instead of hide it!
So what? He's your ex.
@Bricker59@xanga - That's what I was thinking.
Even if he is gay/bi, it shouldn't matter.
Xo
So many people say "so what?" because he's your ex. But it matters. Because you always think, "was I not good enough? Was it something I did?" I have a gay ex-boyfriend and I thought the same stuff.
Someone once told me that I shouldn't have felt bad when we broke up because it was in no way my fault. He was gay! So if that's what you're worried about, then let me say the same: He's gay. That's no fault of yours, sweetie.
My gay ex-boyfriend and I are now good friends (after a year of drama though). You should ask him. The truth and understanding usually help relationships.
well,i turned my ex gay. =/. after the continuous emails to get me back i guess he just figured it wasnt worth it.
I don't see why its a problem for you though. Even if he was gay during the relationship, maybe he didn't realize it himself yet or he wasn't ready to admit it.
One of my exes is gay, I also went to prom with a gay guy before he came out of the closet .. 0.o but it isnt you, theyre born that way =)
Im sure if you give it time he'll tell you for sure
Well, if he's your ex, I don't see why the extreme curiosity is necessary.
If he isn't, so what? If he is, so what?
if he is, so what? at least you didn't marry him, then find out. o_O