Sunday, 28 December 2008
-
How Do You Get Over A Frat Boy?
This is a guest blog submitted by faithful1030.I just don't understand why I can't get over him. It was one night - one night of dancing at a strip club, making out and then holding hands. Nothing too hardcore by today's standards. But I remember feeling distinctly guilty as he moved his tongue in my mouth and playfully touched my hair while a ghetto rap song blasted in the background. Him pulling my miniskirt up. Feeling my thong. Putting his sweaty head on my shoulder. Buying me a beer. "What's your major?" he asked me.
Outside, his cousin said, "You were getting hot and heavy with Rob there, huh? He and Claire broke up two days ago - his girlfriend of two years. You were at the right place at the right time."
On the ride back he didn't speak a word, not even to ask for my phone number when we said goodbye.
I was little too buzzed by my first beer to notice my rejection. Then the next day came and the knife of his rejection began to pierce my heart little by little. Seeing him around campus and having him talking to me like nothing happened would bandage my heart a little, only to have it ripped harder and cut faster everytime I would see him with another girl.
I just had a dream that we were on the phone, talking casually, like we were friends. Then when I woke up, I wanted to die because it was only a dream.
Why can't I just get over him?
RecommendRelated Posts
Post a Comment
- Back to datingish's Datingish Site!
- Note: your comment will appear in datingish's local time zone: GMT -05:00 (Eastern Standard - US, Canada)
About the Author
-
- From: faithful1030@xanga
Stats: This Week All Time Posts: 0 0 Views: 0 0 Comments: 0 0 View all posts by faithful1030@xanga
Comments (44)
you slut.
just kidding. he was looking for rebound and you were there. don't take it too seriously. frat boys aren't that great anyway. just go find one of his bros.
yeah, he just wanted a quick hookup it seems. Other guys can caress you like that, if you really think about it. I usually have a hard time getting over people, but if you really think about it, I mean really think about it, I believe that you can get over him.
pheromones
There's nothing to get over...it was just one night of making out/dancing. He never once indicated he'd want anything serious with you. I know that sounds incredibly harsh, but it's true. Besides...would you really want to date a guy you met in a strip club anyway?
@abcxunt@xanga - HAHHAH.. seriously, get with one of his brothers.
you can't get over him because you were rejected..
or wait, can you not get over the incident? mm
@LizzieLizzie05@xanga - Well said.
i had that happened kinda
i was really really trashed me and my boyfriend of two years broke up a week before
i woke up the next morning and my roommate told me he had a girlfriend.
its been like a month and a half and i havent even seen him on campus or anything. its really weird. same thing though.only made out and held hands.
he walked me back to my dorm too.
theres really nothing to get over. just say hmph it was a random hookup, oh well.
I know how you feel :[[ I shall carefully follow this post to see possible answers/advices.
I'm in a different situation, but it's all about getting over a guy. >___<
well, you didn't mention *how* you were trying to get over him.
stop thinking about him, keep yourself busy, and meet a *good guy* and date him.
it's over between the 2 of you.
@abcxunt@xanga -
@LizzieLizzie05@xanga -
Listen to them.
It was only a casual thing.
The situation sucks, and I've been there. Only, I was the one fresh out of a relationship, using a good guy as a rebound.
It wasn't nice, what he did to you. But it wasn't uncommon either. And there is really nothing you can do about it now that it's happened. The fact that he doesn't care about you should be enough motivation for you to stop wasting your time caring about him. Invest yourself in someone who deserves your attention.
And for future reference.... frat boys are usually not a great idea. :-/
You're one of those girls that always gets her way aren't you? No offense but it seems like you can't get over it because he blew you off, not because of anything specific about him. You need to get over yourself in order to get over him!
stay away from his house and find something else to do with your time--and maybe next time dont let a guy go so far--you let him feel your thong? is that a girl that someone is going to take home to mom? yeah prolly not.
@LadyOblivious - hmm, I never thought it it that way.
Is this the best advice you can give?
Your not choosing to be this way. We have all experienced it, you know its crazy but your mind and body play games with you. I agree with the person that said pheromones.
Its infatuation. The fact that you said you had a dream that you were with him, makes me believe this even more. Your creating a fantasy of what and who you want him to be, except you probably didn't even imagine this until that night.
That night he made you feel so good, like you were the only girl, spark, chemistry etc. It's natural, to feel the way you do, as Im guessing you dont do this very often.
So what? he felt your thong, Im sure you got lost in the moment.
My advice is not from an expert, but this is what I would do. Buy a new dress, get your nails done, make your self feel fantasic and tell yourself that you actually dont give a damn about this guy. Its just a moment to you, as much as it was to him and after this type of thing happens tens times, the getting over period gets shorter.
Probably bad advice, but I cant see any other clear alternative.
The phrases 'get over it' and 'try not to think about it,' are useless. Irrational infatuation is natural feeling, you were suppose to feel this way, I thinks its how we learn about our feelings. (I hope, otherwise Ive been truly wasting my time).
The regection is just a crummy part of putting yourself out there. But dont let it scare you, it only makes you more thicked skinned. I wish I hadn't let things like this get to me over time, but you cant wrap yourself up in cotton wool.
Enjoy you studying
How do you get over him? It seems all too obvious...remember that: 1) He's a frat boy, 2) he used you as a rebound, and 3) he's ignoring you, which obviously means he doesn't care.
You probably can't get over him because you thought it was something more and it wasn't. I know how that is. But he's a jerk for taking advantage of you to get over his girlfriend.
did u like him before u met him or... knew him before？
Not all boys in frats suck, because I've actually met a lot of very nice guys that are members of fraternities. But the stereotypical "frat boys"... stay away from those.
Anyways, "the best way of getting over someone is getting under someone else." Normally I don't advocate rebounds or random flings, but the point is, find someone else to be interested in, preferably someone that's a better catch than this guy was.
@Mike_Malignant@xanga -
so true
Rejection sucks.
That said, he was on the REBOUND. It was never about you. This guy just wanted someone to have some fun with to take his mind off of things. If it hadn't been you it would have been someone else. He didn't choose you because he was attracted and then decide that he wasn't in the end. He chose you because you were there.
He should have found a better way to deal with his break up. You probably shouldn't have read so much into it.
I'm sorry if this seems harsh. I don't mean to hurt you. Its just that I've known more than my share of guys like this. They suck. Feeling unwanted REALLY sucks. I'm sure that you are beautiful and intelligent and this guy is MISSING OUT.
Its hard to get over those feelings of rejection. My advice: Try not to dwell. Go get a manicure/ new dress/ something that will give you an ego boost. Tonight, get all dressed up and go out and dance. If you focus on having a good time with your friends, you will. Maybe you'll meet someone amazing.
If you really want to piss him off, fuck his entire fraternity real dirty...That seems to usually do the trick...He'll be looking for you in no time...
I'd be careful though...
What I really want to know is why you are attracted to unavailable guys...I also want to know why you aren't attracted to the hundreds of other guys that are NOT treating you like you're insignificant...
I guess you just lost your appreciation for the guys that treat you with respect and dignity...
Just please don't write a post about where all the good guys are at...
he must be hot.
The reason you can't get over him is because what you don't know about him, you fill it with your fantasy. You know, what makes a good boyfriend. How he's perfect for you and the only thing stopping you from getting him is blah blah blah. Once you see beyond the cover and who he truly is, he is not all that. Then is when you wake up and get over him.
you should talk to him. tell him how you feel. if you can't do that, it won't work out anyway.
I think you should take some time to yourself and figure out who your are. I think you need to stop depending on other people: their opinions, their presence, etc. You need to focus on yourself and work on who you want/dream to be. Build some self-confidence and never let a d-bag treat you that way. Look in the mirror everyday and tell yourself you are beautiful and you will never let this bs happen again...