Friday, 07 November 2008
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Here Are My Stats; Why Can't I Get Any Girls?
This is a guest blog submitted by Samson.
I'm 6'2" with an athletic build. I'm an accomplished mechanical engineering student, already earning more than Mr. Part-Time could earn in years. I cook damn well.I have many many friends of both genders (read: I'm sociable). I'm a funny guy YEAH!!!
Problem is, I've had no success in getting any of the girls I like. Yes, I am a "good" guy. Yes, I have read articles about women liking "bad" boys. No, I'm not going to purposely be someone who I'm not.
So seriously, someone please enlighten me. Thanks.
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Comments (138)
Because you're not George Clooney?
Nah just kidding. I'm a guy, I can't help you yet. XD
or you are so up to par maybe after learning about you, girls think you won't be interested?
Xo
patience is a virtue.
When they say that size doesn't matter, they're lying. Or at least that's what I've convinced myself to deal with my own failures.
You could be intimidating to some girls. You are obviously very smart and from how you describe yourself a great guy. But some women could be intimidated with smarts and that you are a good guy. Why some girls don't go for the good guy I'm not sure.
I second what JessxMaxine said. Either you're not meeting the right girls [cause, speaking from experience, not all girls are attracted to what's generally considered hot or whatever] or they think you're not interested after getting to know you.
You're hanging around the wrong girls. Just like jessxmaxine already said.
Girls know what they like. We like certain personalities, hair styles, and builds, and usually we tend to flock to those type of people. There are exceptions to this, but there are exceptions to everything. In my opinion, you need to find the girl that likes you, and appreciates you. And if you keep looking, you're never going to find her. It's true. It's cliche, but God knows it's true. So take some time, make some new friends, (not ditching the old ones obviously) and maybe she will pop into your surroundings. Certain girls find different things attractive. You're tall. In my opinion, you're too tall for how short I am. That's just me. That is a major turn-off for me.
Find that girl. She might be hiding, but don't loose hope.
- Gina.
"Getting girls" is more than just about stats....
Neil strauss' "The Game". All you need to know.
Word of caution, be sure to keep women as people instead of objects when reading/working out this interesting read.
Some girls could be intimidated by you and think you're too good to be true. A successful guy who can cook, has a lot of friends, and is funny too? Come on. =P
There's some merit to the idea that women are intimidated by how many good qualities you have. Men are not the only ones who shy away from asking out a person they see as "out of their league".
But even if you are athletic, have good grooming practices, dress well, act confidently, and speak intelligently, it doesn't mean that finding a suitable partner is going to be easy. Nor should it be easy. After all, it sounds like you're a rare guy, and when you are a rare guy it's usually the case that it'll be a rare girl who can match you.
My advice would be: don't settle for any less than a woman who is just as amazing as you are in an effort to feel as if you can "get chicks".
what kind of girls do you like? i agree with what others have said - maybe you're just liking the wrong girls.
I could be wrong, but this almost comes off as arrogant and a little cocky. Especially with the "Mr. Part-Time" you mention. Maybe that's your problem. Girls (the ones worth being with, anyway) sense big egos a mile away, and steer clear. I'm sure you're a great guy, but if you come off in person the way you did in this blog, you may be pushing the right girls away. Sometimes people don't realize they're as cocky as they sound, so maybe just tone it down? Remember...you're human, just like everybody else, and even Mr. Part-Time deserves a great girl. Don't think you're better than everybody else and put yourself up on a pedestal because you're only going to push people away.
You just haven't found the right one. It happens. Maybe with all of those stats, you're intimidating. Most women hate feeling like they're upstaged, and hate feeling like you can do better than them. You'll just have to find a woman that is secure enough in herself to embrace your acheivements, rather than being scared off by them.
Do you tell girls how great you are? I have a buddy who's great but he loves talking about himself; turns girls off.
Do you move fast? Ask for her number the first time you meet her? no bueno.
It's not all about stats.... it's about how you work with what you've got.
There's so much more to it than all that. I'd need a lot more information before I could really assess what was going wrong. Or maybe that's part of the problem - you think it should be so simple, but romance is not so simple. You have to work for it.
@Pterota@xanga - What she said. Be a bit more humble?
Maybe you are funny looking, most girls don't usually like ugly guys. You seem to have every other thing going for you, so if its not your looks i'll go with the cocky thing. You sound full of yourself, most girls don't like that either.
Yeahh, I think maybe you could try to be more humble? I don't know if you talk like this in real life, or if this is just an online thing to prove a point, but being humble is important imo. I don't necessarily think 'stats' are really important because every girl has different preferences.
But anyway, someday the right girl will come along when you're least expecting.
ok first off reading some of the comments are getting me a bit steamed. Just a WEEE bit.
What is the "right" girl? It's quite arbitrary, it's not like as if the girl walks up to you with a sign or sticker that says "right" girl. So don't even bother to listen to that cliche (I want to say crap, but to be nice) stuff.
Anyways I'm sorta in the same boat, the way I see it is. Just continue meeting people, one of them should click with you sooner or later? But I'm a guy so I'm not much of a help haha But I definitely feel strongly about what I stated up top.
be patient with yourself. the secret to finding somebody is not searching for them to begin with. Enjoy the journey not the destination.
Focus on the things you do and you'll find somebody you recognizes the things you bring to the table. I can't stress enough how much you just gotta do you and that it will figure itself out.
Granted, you need to put yourself out there a bit. Take a bit of risk.
i agree with cdedodgethis, , are you ugly? do you have a mole with hair? bushy untamed eyebrows? yellow teeth <- if that's the case whiten them!!
here's the thing about girls. if we were given the option to get with a guy who was fat, but cute or a guy who fit and ugly...chances are we'd pick the fat and cute guy. why? coz he's cute. plain and simple.
but all in all, if you think you're the ish that shows and that's very unattractive too.
You just answered your own question, you stubborn fool. Nice guys always finish last. If you aren't going to use something that works, then you deserve everything you get (or, in this case, aren't getting).
do you have any close girl friends? ask one of them to tell you truthfully what they think about you and what they think the problem is. I have a very dear friend (girl) that had the same problem. Statistically speaking she should of had men at her feet-tall, blonde, big boobs, beautiful, masters degree and funny as hell. Problem? her social skills were sorely lacking in some areas-she stood too close to people when she talked to them, had a tendency to flaunt her brains and education, had bad breath (coffee) and worst of all, she also had a need to be the center of attention at all times and did whatever was necessary to be so. After almost a year of having several late night heart to hearts with her friends, both male and female (we all said the same thing), she worked on it and is now happily married with her first baby.Â
I'm not saying anything is wrong with you, but it might not hurt to get brutally honest feedback and go from there.