Wednesday, 05 November 2008

• Are You A Risk Taker or Risk Evader?

  This is a guest blog submitted by AimeeAnne.
  

  
  

  I have a long-held theory that people can generally be dropped into one of two categories: Risk Takers or Risk Evaders.

  And even though I'm not fond of sweeping generalizations, it's been my experience that people rarely fall between the cracks, because even subtle characteristics can make a person swing one way or the other.

  How do you know which category you fall under?  Here's a litmus test:

  • Do you fly by the seat of your pants or do you live life by a schedule?
  • How often do you end up in conflict or drama with your SO, family, friends or people in general?

  If you have a tendency to throw caution to the wind (in relationships, careers or hobbies), you're an RT.  You put forth a great amount of risk, and because of this, can often fly high from success or splat hard in failure.  But either way, you're living life to the fullest.  You thrive on the risk, and strive to create more in situations around you because it's what you were born to do and how you feel most alive.  Motto: Go for broke!

  REs, on the other hand, very rarely do spontaneous things.  If they do, it's something crazy like ordering a different entree from their favorite restaurant.  They, too, put forth risk...but in much smaller doses on a drastically reduced scale.  While it might appear that they aren't living at all, they are generally just content to stay within reduced boundaries.  The less they risk, the less chance there is of failing or ending up in situations they might regret.  Motto: If it ain't broke, don't fix it.  (And if it is, fix it yourself or by involving as few people as possible.)

  While an RT might feel like jumping out of an airplane is risky (but might do it anyway for the thrill), an RE could feel the same way about simply setting foot on an airplane at all (and might avoid it unless absolutely necessary).

  I am a Risk Evader.  Risk Takers tend to be quite entertaining to me.  But while I may be enamored by an RTs ability to frolick through life, I will pull back when one gets too close (à la bull-in-a-china-shop).  Sure it's good to shake things up every now and then, I'll give you that.  But that's the exception for my life, not the rule.  And I argue that it's because I was born this way, not because I've devolved into a gunshy, bitter recluse.

  RTs will probably tend to see me that way, however, because their view of life is so contrary to my own.  In the same way, REs like myself will probably tend to view RTs as reckless, free spirits who need more stability and less "fun".

  There is, as always, a balanced perspective to strive for.  But I believe that relationships work better if both are Risk Takers or Risk Evaders.

  RTs and REs come in varying degrees.  Not all RTs are extroverts and not all REs are introverts.  I could give theories about what degree of extroversion/introversion works best with RT and RE couples, but as with all theories, there are a number of exceptions.  For example, double RE introverted relationships could be fulfilling, as neither will push the other to leave the preferred circle of friends or established comfort zone.  This could provide a perfect environment for a thriving, happy relationship.  Or it could produce friction down the line as boredom sets in.  After all, an introverted RE is going to be far less adventurous than an extroverted RE. 
  

  In the same way, an extroverted RT couple could have a passionate and adventurous live-for-the-moment romance, which could be just the thing they need to keep their commitment alive.  Or it could introduce tension when they feel pulled in opposite directions, driven apart by the very passions, pursuits, and people that brought them together in the first place.

  For myself, a confirmed Risk Evader of the highest degree, I believe that equilibrium will be found with someone able to nudge me out of my [insert your choice of word here: shell, comfort zone, hole, fear-of-humanity] existence, and cautiously embark with me on a well-prepared journey that leaves some routine for moments of spontaneity.  Someone who is less introverted or somewhat extroverted, but still a Risk Evader.  It would never work for me to be swept off my feet, or (while I'm flinging cliché  s around) have the rug yanked right out from under me.  I need someone who is different enough to bring a spark, but not sparky enough to burn the place down.

  Change happens in life.  Risk Takers embrace it, and perhaps even cause the initial shuffle which will force it.  Risk Evaders will loathe it, but will learn to allow it and perhaps even grow to love it, just not in frenzied doses.

  So where do you fit in?  Are you a Risk Taker or a Risk Evader, and how do you think it affects relationships with those around you?

  • 9:15 PM
  • 2438 Views
  • 72 eProps
  • 37 Comments