Mr. LionI read
an old NY Times article this morning about women who kept their last name after marriage. Traditionally, women take up the last name of the husband or have their last name turned into the middle name. Turns out that some guys are even changing their last names to reflect their wives' last names. I didn't even know that was even possible.
I don't think I would change my last name to my wife's, but if she wanted to keep her last name, I wouldn't have a problem with it.
My mom did not take my dad's last name after she married - it was really important to her because she wanted her kids to ask about her family's history through her last name. It was a great idea until it came time to do paperwork.
My parents were always mistaken for single parents or divorced when we went to the doctor, bank or any place where their names had to be written. It further complicated things for us because my brother and I took my dad's name and my sisters took my mom's last name.
It becomes confusing to many but we love the unique nature of our names. So if my wife ever wanted to keep her family's last name for whatever reason, it wouldn't be a problem; I already know how to deal with all the confusion.
Is changing your name after getting married necessary or just a formality to ease the confusion?
No matter if you're a guy or girl, do you plan to take your future spouse's last name? Why or why not?
Comments (139)
Whenever I get married, I'll take my husband's name.
I plan to take my husband's last name...it has crossed my mind to have my name hyphenated.
Me too. I'm traditional like that.
Probably, I wouldn't want my kids to go through being made fun of. (don't ask). Anywayz, I wouldn't want to break tradition.
I think changing your last name is definitely a formality and not a necessity. It's funny that there's a blog about this because I was just having this discussion with my roommate and I've decided to keep my last name. I honor my family and since I'm the only grandchild AND a female the legacy dies with me and I plan on keeping it going for as long as possible. :) In the future if I ever have kids,I don't expect them to take my last name, I'd be perfectly fine if they took their father's. Aloha!
yes, i'm taking my future husband's last name (in 3 months, haha). while it's going to take some time to get used to it, i think it's important for us to look like a united front, although it doesn't mean you DON'T look united if your last names differ.
my fiance has said though that he won't mind if i don't take his last name.
Is it bad that my decision of whether I full on take my future husband's last name or take it with a hyphen completely depends on how nice it'll sound? Haha. Seriously. Whichever sounds better. And if my husband's last name is really crappy, then I'll just keep mine.
Can you tell this doesn't matter to me much? lol
I'm totally taking my husband's last name. I'm just really traditional and stuff, like I've always wanted a husband and kids and the whole nine yards.
Nope, I like my last name, I am not changing it. If his last name can combine well with mine, I may add it.
This was something I had been thinking about a lot lately as by taking my guys name I would have to have the most generic last name one could have"smith". I don't think I would keep my last name as I think that would be confusing, but I am considering a hyphenation. Who knows, luckily I have 2 years to decide.
I intend to take my husband's last name--and hyphenate it if his is kinda strange. With the current plan, hopefully not. :)
To me, it would be an insult if my fiance didn't take my last name.
In marriage, you need to be willing to give everything you have to your spouse, and for a woman, she must realize that she is obligated to respect this man she is marrying and to let him be the leader of their home. That is symbolized well by her taking his last name.
I would probably have my last name changed to my husband's, if I ever got married. I work in an accounting office where we do numerous tax returns and I know for a fact it is more convenient to have married couples with the same last name, not only for tax return purposes but also for informational purposes as well. I would not hyphenate my last name to his last name either... Too long!
i want my husband's last name
I'll take my husband's last name, I have no real reason to keep mine.
My boyfriend & I were just talking about this the other day. I'll add his name, but I'm keeping mine. I'm simply keeping my last name because my father died when I was very young and I'd like to honor him this way.
Personally.. he had better have a REALLY COOL last name for me to change mine, since mine is awesome. =) I would never be a Smith or a Johnson or anything boringly American. And if he has such a plain last name I would encourage him to take my last name, because it makes you stand out to have a neat last name that no one can pronounce except members of your family and your friends. It's almost elitist, haha, but people do tend to remember last names for which they have to ask for a pronunciation. But seriously, he'd have to have a hell of a catchy last name to get me to change mine to it.
I am considering hyphenating or adding as my middle name my mother's maiden name.. Very Italian names, both her old and new last names.
I think changing your name isn't necessary, but it's totally fine, too- a matter of personal preference. I could see authors and artists who have already made a name for themselves not wanting to change their names because that might be confusing to the rest of the world.
I am DEFINITELY changing my last name when I get married. My future husband's name is unique and so much more awesome than my maiden name, which is in the top three most common last names in the U.S. I've wanted to escape my boring last name ever since gradeschool, when everyone thought I was related to the class pest because we had the same last name!
Sometimes it just depends. Some people don't change their names, male or female, because of the career they have before marriage.
Me? I don't think it really matters, hyphenated or not. I would take hers--I'm okay with it plus I hate most of the "formal traditions" we have pulled through the years.
So, no I don't think it is necessary. People have a choice and I choose not to be so blindly traditional.
Well! I'm partially biased since I dislike my last name. ;( It's so common it makes me sick! But I digress.
Taking your spouse's last name should not be a necessity regardless of what people think. Break traditional roles! I bet there's some sort of "wife belongs to husband" story behind the original idea of taking the husband's last name, but I'm far too lazy to actually research on it.
I would definitely take my future husband's last name. Why? Because I don't like mine. :) Nguyen ftl. :(
Depends on his name.
My current boyfriend's last name is "Perez." I would not be taking that one - too common. But I also wouldn't force my horrid last name on anyone. Maybe inventing a new name would be ideal in some circumstances.
I'm going to take my husbands last name. My initials will stay the same, and my parents will be involved, so my children will know about my family history(my dad is really chatty).
I contemplated taking on my spouse's last name when I get married & then keeping my maiden name for teaching purposes.. That way, the kids can't badger me at home by looking up my name in the phone book! lol. Ok, I'm not that horrible of a person but I definitely don't want some kid's therapist to constantly call me at home & stuff when I just want to relax & unwind from a long day of work. That was the plan until my boyfriend said it wouldn't work because of the paperwork issues.. -__-"
So then I thought about hyphenating the last names together but if I were to marry my boyfriend, it'd be Chu-Choi. Imagine that teasings! The thought of being called "chew toy" is unbearable. lol. Kids are so cruel these days!
So.. as of right now, I will take on my husband's name as originally planned 'cause I want to [& 'cause if my boyfriend becomes my husband, he'd want want me to as well.] I'll just try to figure out if it's still possible to use my maiden name for teaching purposes.. [If anyone knows if that can be done, please let me know! Spanks, I'd really appreciate it! :)]
I think whenever I get married, I'll take my husband's last name.
It doesn't matter to me if the girl wants to take on my last name or not. In chinese culture, the girl usually keeps their maiden name anyway. It's more important for the kids to take on my last name cuz of the whole lineage thing, yada yada. It'd be a pain to have separate last names for the kids, and in my opinion even more so if they're all hyphenated. Imagine if they practiced hyphenations 10 generations ago and kept going till today... my last name would take 10 minutes to read!