Friday, 05 September 2008
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Friday Fun: How Long Do You Spend on The Phone?
This question was submitted by a Datingish reader.
I've always wondered how much time the average couple spends hanging out or talking on the phone. I've seen everything from seeing each other every day, to nothing but a phone call every other week. So I'm just curious to hear what everyone else's opinion is on how much time couples should spend with each other.
My boyfriend and I talk every night on the phone, and see each other about every two weeks, because he lives in another town. I'm not sure if that's normal or not.
Does it depend on how much you like each other, how much space you need, etc.?
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Comments (56)
My boyfriend and I see each other once every two or three weeks. We talk on the phone most nights, unless one of us has something going on. We usually talk for an hour or two in each conversation.
I'm not sure what "normal" is, but I think that whatever works for you is a good amount.
i think the farther away you are from your SO, the more you'll be on the fone...unless you've been dating a long time, i.e. 10 yrs plus, then the usage of the fone might drop. if you're new in your relationship, you'll more likely be on the fone 24/7.
my boyfriend and I try to see each other daily. We go to the same university. Last year, for the first semester he literally lived with me for a few weeks until he got his own place, but still we were practically inseparable. It was like he never left. If we weren't in class we were together. When I went to Italy, however, we tried to make contact everyday in some way. We spent a lot of money on calling cards and such and he dropped some cash to come visit. And we would try to get on the computer at odd hours to account for the time difference (we both didn't have personal internet access). During summers and breaks and such we aren't near each other (he lives in NYC, and I'm from NC) but we try to make trips if possible. We will talk for hours during the times we are apart. Now we're together in school again, but he's busy because he's an RA (which is pretty much a 24 hour deal) so we may not see each other as often as we'd like because of class and meetings and work and such but we try our hardest to at least catch an hour or two a day together if I don't stay the night. We're also pretty much in constant contact even tho we only call each other for urgent business. <3 text messaging.
I dunno. guess we're one of "those" couples. everyone is different tho, and every relationship is different also because I definitely wasn't around my exes so much in the past and I was comfortable with that.
I'm in a long distance relationship (705 miles, to be exact!), so we spend A LOT of time on the phone and we text throughout the day.
We're talking about moving somewhere central to both of us so that we can actually spend time together, but until then.....
my boyfriend and i talk every night and we both tend to fall asleep on the phone..
so the call goes on until it just disconnects, which is usually after 4 hours...
we see each other when we can, which isn't often lately because i work and he has school...
he likes to talk on the phone a lot, and i've grown accustomed to falling asleep with him on the phone.. so yea...
it was like every couple of days...but that was in the beginning.
I think it just depends on the person...
I really hate talking on the phone, it's practically a phobia, it's so bad...
There's only a couple people I can stand talking to on the phone, so yea.
But we text, and we see each other at school everyday, so it's not a big deal.
Even over the summer, though, we didn't talk on the phone unless we were making plans to meet up, so... i don't know what's normal, but i don't spend a lot of time on the phone. :(
I'm not a phone person...I've never been...not even in highschool, I never gossiped on the phone. My phone calls are all under 30 seconds, and only when necessary. =X I guess I'm just not too updated on new technology...i prefer to see the person face to face while talking...like in the olden days
i see my girlfriend about 4 times a week and we call each other every night for about an hour (more or less depending on if it's a weekend or if i'm hanging out with friends) and we're always texting unless we have class or homework. we go to different colleges but we still do everything to see each other as much as possible because being sick of each other is honestly a much better emotion than missing each other constantly. right now, mondays, tuesdays with her family, and friday/saturday is our schedule to hang out and it works out fairly well, though for all the time we spend together i miss her even when it's just for two days. we have an interesting relationship, but i love it and her. i could never get a job that forces me to travel unless i could bring her with me because i can't leave her side for a second. her being at the beach for 8 days was bad enough, even though we talked every night and texted most of the time. we're just very... involvative? haha. we do everything together, and that's how we like it!
We talk on the phone every day (before we go to the bed) and see each other 3 times a week.
Every day, save one day every two weeks due to one of us being busy. He lives far away too, so we try to make it a nightly thing.
The most we've ever talked was... two hours? And that was a year ago! Or maybe more than a year ago... but lately, the most we've talked has been an hour. On average I have to say about 40 minutes. Sometimes 30. Or 20?
I need sleep. >_>
My bf and i used to go out like twice every week, and we have phone chats every night and the conversation goes on for like hrs. Its like we never run out of things to talk about.
But then he went to australia for further studies, and won't be back till like two years later. Well, we don't get to go out like the way we used to, but we still talk on the fone for hours and hours XD
My boyfriend and I see each other almost everyday. The only time we will not see each other in a day is if our work schedules over lap and he gets out after I go in, but even then we go and see each other on break. I feel that if a couple does not want to spend that much time together then they are not right for each other.. but in your case with living in different towns, it's harder for you...
My boyfriend and I talk for at least 2 hours on the phone every night. He's away at West Point and I only get to see him once every 2 months or something. So I guess that's why it works. But even when he was here, we'd still talk for a long time.
If I don't see my boyfriend on a particular day, I make sure we get at least an hour to talk on the phone. Sometimes our conversations run for a maximum of two hours, sometimes less. When he and I are spending time together on a certain day, then we don't talk on the phone afterwards. We're both relatively busy people now that school has started up again, we see each other on an average of once or twice a week, so phone calls are pretty much all that we have =P.
I personally don't use the phone very often.
I don't need daily contact, I guess.
But I do always enjoy our conversations together :)
When we talk on the phone, we talk for hours.
We usually talk forever, anywhere from 3 to 6 hours.
I'm not kidding, either. =]
We also go to the same school,
so I see him everyday, pretty much.
this is what i've been wondering for a while. everyone has different views on it.
i know the constant adults in my life have. they repeatedly have said to me that a phone call everyday is strange and tiring, but i think so differently. hearing his voice makes my day and it's like a good charm for the next day. and if we could, i would see him everyday because being apart sometimes hurts so much.
they should really read this post. it really depends on the relationship. nothing is strange.
"normal" is a fallacy. How much you see each other and how much you talk depends on solely on the two of you. Don't worry about anyone else.
i think this is really interesting, cause well with my ex we would see each other everyday. I felt like it was too clngy, like too much of each other. plus he ALWAYS wanted to talk on MSN, nd also call each other at night. it was really annoying. im single now but im talkin to this guy now that ireally like,we talk every night tho but he lives far. and he works, and has school. I think it depends ifyou see each other alot you dont spend as much time on the phone.
yes I think so
It's not quantity its quality =)
Yeah it depends...according to our schedules...I think once a week is okay with phone calls and instant messaging to fill in the other gaps of the week...but I think we all have different preferences according to how much freedom we want, and how far away we are from one another...but still...
1 minute of 'real quality time' is better than seeing each other every day but having no real 'connection'
it all depends i guess, but my first and current girlfriend and i during summer [because of lack of being able to see each other daily] talked on the phone every night for about 5 hours, which i know is excessive, but was great. if you can still talk enjoyably and don't run out of things to talk about, why miss that chance, right?
we IM everyday and spend at least an hour together at school, much reduced from before now that we don't have any of the same classes.
giving each other 'space' can be kinda bullshit sometimes. yes, there can be times when you just seem nosy and needy to your SO, but to just kinda treat each other like 'hey' acquaintances ever is just...no.
I think it depends on many things.
I see my boyfriend every Sunday because he lives 60 miles away and we have probably 20, 1-3 minute conversations on the phone during the day and then we talk for more than an hour right before we go to bed. This might sound babyish but I can't sleep without talking to him right as I put my head down on my pillow.
So we talk a lot on the phone because we only see each other once a week. We love each other but I know that if we didn't talk so often it would affect our relationship. We need to be close. :) So I guess it also depends on the type of couple.
I started dating my current boyfriend about a month before the spring semester ended. I went off to do an internship about three hours away and he stayed in the city we go to school in. We didn't see one another for three months but we would call one another every two or three days and talk for about two hours, and I did manager to make it up to school for about two days during the summer.
Now that we're back at school together, we generally spend a few hours a day together, depending on how busy we are. We'll sit together at meals if we're there at the same time and two or three days a week I generally go to his dorm for a few hours if neither of us are too busy.