Friday, 22 August 2008
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Friday Fun: Ask Anything - We'll Try to Help!
Last time we did this, things got pretty crazy . . . so let's do it again.
Post a question you've always wanted to ask someone of the opposite sex and someone should be happy to field your quandary.
I'll start: Would you rather date a girl smarter than you are or someone not quite as intelligent? Why?
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Comments (94)
how do you know when a guy is interested in you more than just a friend?
How do you know when someone is lying about being in love with you? And what's the point of downplaying feelings?
@sahar - when he wants to have sex with you and actually cares about whats on your mind instead of nodding along. And even so, when it gets to that point I would wait 2 more weeks just to be sure.
@Lifes_Bookmark@xanga - Don't know if this is directed to a guy or a girl. But I am going to assume guy. The only reason why a guy would be lying to you about loving you is because they want something. You can't really know if they are lying unless you catch them or being with that person you kind of figure it out.
Downplaying feelings I can probably answer better. We downplay stuff because we don't know what the response/reaction will be or worse we know what it will be but we don't want to get the full brunt of the consequence.
I hope that answered your question. If not, im sorry . . . I am just a doggie ruff ruff.
I would really care if she was smarter than me or not as intelligent (knowledge or street smarts?). As long as she didn't use it as a way for feeling superior or inferior. EX If she was smarter, use it as a way of getting what she wanted and being arrogant. If she was not as smart, using it as a way to get other people to do things for her and not think for herself.
In response to the post: Smarter, but in a different field. Smarter in the same field leads to pride, insecurity, and competitiveness, not as intelligent in the same field leads to the same for the other person. Smarter in a different field means that both people have their strengths and specialties without having clashes over whose interpretation of events/problem-solving solutions are better. It works out pretty well.
...I got nothin' in terms of questions.
I'd rather date someone a little smarter than me because I love learning.
But if they were a lot smarter than me (and especially if they ALWAYS had to rub it in) it would get really old really fast.
@dreamerboi23@xanga - Thanks it WAS helpful. You're right about downplaying...
Well for me, a woman's intelligence is a big part of their attractiveness. That combined with the fact that I find it much easier to converse with more intelligent people means that I would much rather have an extremely intelligent girl no matter how much more intelligent she may be than me.
how do you know if it was a date or just hanging out?
Why is it that usually asian girls are attracted to white guys, but asian guys aren't attracted to white girls or vice versa?
Is it possible for me to ever lose feelings for my first love? Even after I broke up with her?
@sahar - start paying attention to what they guy does and specifically what he does for you (not so much what he says)..
i would like to follow up on little-apple's question...
what's the difference between dating and hanging out..and what's the difference between dating and bf/gf? and what's the difference between dating and "friends w/ benefits"
I love it when a girl is smart. Brains are so sexy... gives me mindgasms =D.
To the ladies: Name, in order of preference, the top 5 most attractive traits in a guy.
@Dustin_wind@xanga - yes it is, just find someone better. Look at Romeo... he didn't think he could get over Rosalind, but once he met Juliet, it was like "uhhh Rosalind who?" and thus was born the greatest love story of all time :)
@monikasiauw@xanga - that's not true about asian guys not being into white girls. I find plenty of white girls to be pretty and would date them. I think there's this perception of asian guys being more passive than other guys, which is why the white girls won't go for them (and why some asian girls go for the white guys).
@myyellowriver - Simple. The difference between "hanging out" and "dating": a kiss. The difference between dating and "friends with benefits": the emotional factor.
What the fuck do you guys mean when you say I'm "soft?" I think nearly every guy I've been with (physically) has said that. I always get mad cuz I think they're telling me I'm fat, but they insist it's not that at all, and it's a good thing. I've heard it used for other girls as well. Please tell me.
Also, should I get a boob job?
Just kidding. =)
@sorjai@xanga - Yeah, I meant white girls aren't that into asian guys usually, I just word it wrong. I just see couples with asian girls and white guys more often than white girls with asian guys.
@myyellowriver - i think it's an answer "the world may never know." lol
Question to XY: If you were in a committed relationship and cheated, would you confess to your partner?
One thing I've noticed is that when a guy confesses to a girl that he likes her, the girl becomes more inclined to like him back, even if she's never felt that way about him before.
Is it the same way for girls who confess? Or are they seen as less attractive because they seem desperate?
@monikasiauw@xanga - I was. Maybe it's a cultural thing or a sense of overall apprehension?
@OstentatiousEloquence@xanga - It means you're comfy. At least, that's what I infer when my gf says I'm soft, because if she calls me fat, I'm going to be so painfully irked. I'm clearly the only person that can call me fat. And when I say comfy, I mean that in a non-'you're fat' way. It just means it's nice. Maybe it means your skin is soft, too; that probably varies by person.
...An easy way to get an answer on that one is to take umbrage and see how they defend themselves, incidentally.
Also, to the other question: Heavens, no. Take the money and go buy yourself a Fiat Panda.
How do you know it's appropriate to talk about marriage in a relationship? like how do you know it's not too soon to think about??
@little_apple_red@xanga - "a date or not a date that is the question" I hate that question, because i kept asking it! Date is really any time you set a time and day to do anything. Try asking yourself this: why were you hanging out and what were the linguistic, tonal, and body language cues telling you? The honest answer you get out of that is probably a safer cue to what's going on than asking a zillion of your friends 'was that a date'? There's also the old fashioned, honest abrupt response of asking him/her how he/she feels about you. Scary, but may save some disappointment