This is a guest blog submitted by a Datingish reader (she is a Korean female).I was standing in line at Starbucks and this African guy with a heavy accent behind me said, "You look like a dog."
"What?!"
"You look like a dog."
"I look like a dog?!?!" I exclaimed incredulously.
"Yes."
"I look like a dog?!?!?!?!?!"
"A
doll. You look like a doll. Your skin is so smooth. You look just like a doll."
Then he asked what country I am from, told me he'd been to Korea before, blah, blah, blah. If you're an Asian girl, you know the drill. Maybe I should have asked him where he was from. Africa?!? You don't say! Wow you speak English so well!
Almost every time a guy tries to pick up an Asian girl on the street, they invariably say one of the following:
- Where are you from? (New York City) No, where are you from originally?
- You speak English so well!
- I've been to Korea before!
- Ahnyunghaseyo! (Korean for hello)
- Konichiwa! (Japanese for hello)
- Nihowma! (Chinese for hello)
- I had a Korean girlfriend before!
- My brother/cousin/pet iguana used to date a Korean girl!
- I love Korean food!
I'm always polite about it, but inside I'm doing the double eyeroll. Most of the time they're nice so I can't be mean to them - they just don't know any better. Sometimes I want to tell them that the above tactics are not the way to an Asian girl's heart.
I know not everyone can tell Asians apart so they love to find out "where you're from"... but I wonder if this happens to other races. Do you ever get comments like this about your ethnicity?
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Comments (175)
sometimes, even our own people can't tell where we are from.
ppl always ask where i'm from ... and i tell them. and they sound slightly disappointed as if i didn't really answer their question. so then they have to ask again, what nationality am i. then i answer.
thanks for the laugh:)
Because I'm mixed, I've gotten 'what are you?' type questions many times. When I was younger my skin was much much lighter than it is now, so people didn't know if I was white with a tan or just a really light-skinned black girl, or something altogether different. When I straighten my hair, you can see the Cherokee in me- especially during the summer when my hair takes a reddish tint.
To make life simple I just call myself black, even though genetically I'm more white than black and may not even be at all African- my biological father is white and I never took the time to find out whether that included German, Italian, or whatever, my maternal grandfather is Cherokee and Santo Domingan, and my maternal grandmother might have African roots, or black Mexican roots, or any other roots you could possibly mix together to make the black woman she is. Who knows. That's why I never refer to myself as African American- for all I know I might not be one single percent African.
Haha, that sucks. I only get what country are you from when I'm with the boyfriend's family. They're all from Liberia and they just assumed he would date an African girl, but he got stuck with an AMERICAN girl!
why do the double eye roll on the inside? i just do it on the outside.
See, I never do that. Regardless of the race, I just say:
"How you doin?"
It just kind of comes out.
No, anymore I just walk up to a girl and say I love sake and chinese food and wait for her to hit me.
-And if she doesn't I then proceed to demonstrate my ability to use chopsticks.
ALL THE TIME. I don't mind if they ask me. I do mind when they automatically assume or guess.
But hey, I guess if I was a guy who saw a hot asian chic standing there, I wouldn't go up and ask her thoughts on what's going on in the middle east or what her favorite color is. I'd try to find something we had in common.
I also like it a lot better than the cat calls that I get from the very, very short unattractive latino men that follow me around.
@yeongmee@xanga - lol.
hmm as an asian guy I must utilize these tactics. The girl will see the humor in it since I am asian and fall under my control muahahahaha . . . .
it's hard to assimilate into the american culture when on the outside we look totally different. i think we do the same things as well, not knowing which part of africa the dude's from, and he might get mad if you ask him about it. it goes both ways i think.
hahaha i get 'yuh bo sae yo'! all the time
When I was in Spain I had TONS of men asking me where I was from, and I laughed all the time. I speak English well, so they think I'm from the US, Canada or the UK (I'm not). I look Chinese, so they think I'm from China (I'm not).
I could say a WHOLE lot more, but I won't. Let me just go LOL now.
I always get the "Where are you from?". My reply is always "Oh, I was born here in Australia." Which of course leads to "No, what nationality are you? Where are your parents from? You Chinese? Japanese?"
Whenever people approach me like this I get a "YELLOW FEVER" warning in my head and I run hahahahah
To defend the American guys who do that, I think it must be human nature. I got the same type of thing when I lived in Spain- apparently I look either American or Russian- and guys often used stock English phrases to talk to me. It must be frustrating to be American and be treated like an oddity though.
'Where are you from?' 'Hong Kong.' 'Do you do Kung Fu then?' 'Err no.' 'Do you like Jacky Chen?' 'Err not particularly...' 'Right...'
Such a great convo eh??
What's with all the Starbucks posts lately?
Yup, I get that a lot from people I encounter. Hehe. :P
all. the. time!
(i'm korean)
Nope! But then.. being a blonde blue-eyed white girl.... it's not hard to tell where my family's from, lol.
number one question i get asked is where are you from? new york
no i mean where is your family from? hong kong.
dumbass people, why don't you just ask me straight forward what race am I?
or the ever popular, what country are you from? america.
some people will hop from country to country spanning all of asia. are you filipino? korean? japanese? no but thanks for playing.
i think i'm going to start pulling the same thing. you look white, so you european?
Yup. All the time. "Where you come from?" And then I tell them, I came from Mama's vajayjay when it came time for me to come out into the wide world, just like they did.
i get asked if i'm alot of things usually asian or italian and i say no i'm mexican and then usually they start speaking spanish to me and i have to say "sorry i don't speak spanish" and i swear they give me the death glare like i'm just messing with them to be mean. i'm not lol i honestly don't speak it but [[especially older generations]] hispanic people get offended that i don't. so i just say i'm mixed mexican and irish and was raised in an english speaking home. but sometimes they still don't believe me. it doesn't bother me as much as it used to...you get used to having to explain it over and over again
Well, I'm black and on a date once someone asked me "so, where are you from in Africa?".. he was totally serious too! Had I been chewing or sipping something I'm pretty sure I would have choked on it! I wanted to be like "um... I'm from San Diego" but he was just trying to be nice and really 'get' me, I guess. I think. I hope! Still though, at that point I knew he wasn't the guy for me!
I also had a guy once comment on my name, he was surprised! I mean, the tone of his voice indicated that he was expecting me to say something like "LaMoniquesha" instead of a more demure "Maleka".... good times!