by
Mr. Macchiato
On the subject of dressing up for dates, it's funny: Mrs. Macchiato spends a lot of time getting ready for dates. But the dates aren't with me - they are for her girlfriends!
When we go out on a date, she will usually come more or less as she is. If we're going to a fancy restaurant, she might put on a little makeup... but probably not. That doesn't bother me at all - I prefer her without makeup.
But if she meets up with her girlfriends, she goes all out. She picks out a nice outfit... put on not just lipstick but foundation and blush... and puts on some strappy shoes. It's a total transformation!
I asked her why she goes all out for her girlies and not for me and she said, it's because all the other girls go all out. I guess they are all thinking the same thing, because when I see the pics later it is all very "Sex and the City".
I still don't really get it though. Wouldn't you want to go more all out for your man than for your girlfriends? I asked around with some other guys, and a bunch of them said their girls do the same thing. We are all baffled by this one.
So for the ladies: do you go more all out for your girlfriends than you do for your man? If so, please help us understand this mystery!
For the guys: does it ever bug you that she puts more effort into going out with her girlies than she does for you?
Comments (61)
I get equally dressed up for either.
Generally, it's a sign that I'm comfortable with my man if I don't feel the need to get dressed up for him. That's a very good thing.
Nope, I have my boys I hang out with. Why should I get mad at her when I do the same thing.
Girls compete with other girls.
I don't go all out for anyone. I dress according to where I am going,
not to impress people. It takes me the same amount of time to get ready
for my boyfriend as it does to get ready for my girlfriends.
if she's with her gfs, she wants to look the hottest out of the bunch. no one wants to be the ugly one lol with her bf/husband... she's already got him in the bag =)
i try harder with the bf, only cuz i see him 3-4 times a year. the closest gfs have seen me at my worst so it doesn't matter anymore.
Haha. I just go all out in general or depending on where I go. :P
But I think it's because your guy (probably) accepts you for who you are already and thinks you are beautiful just as you are. Unless he's a huge asshole, but we won't go there.
Also, we want to feel like the best looking ones there (I personally don't try too hard because some people's definition of "going all out" is "tranny mess") But for guys it's different because we're already with you. lol
It also depends on where you're going. The Dance Club: No choice but to go all out because EVERYONE who's anyone goes all out at clubs (or my age group: Homecoming Dances and Senior Prom) and at most night clubs the bouncer lets you in without waiting in line if you look really good. lol
And it's fun; for us to dress up and look all "Sex And The City" like with our girls. :)
I think one of the reasons is getting all dolled up takes time, and buys don't like to wait :)
also, girls are way more critical and competitive about the way they look and the way others around them look
I don't go all out for my gal pals or my boyfriend.
The only times I really go all out are for special occasions. :D Or just the spur of the moment. ^_^
Girls get dressed up for their gfs because the girls will actually notice. Guys will just say "you look prettier today but I can't figure out why."
I've actually thought a lot about this myself. I think that girls secretly hate each other. They're always in competition with each other, so when they go out, they all try to one-up everyone.
When it comes down to it, all these things -- the nice hair, the makeup, the clothes, the bag, the shoes, the nails, your skin, the jewelry -- do you know what it is?
PLUMAGE.
Yes, we're animals too. And we display our plumage like animals for sexual attraction. You may think you do it to look good for yourself, or to look good around your friends, but look deeper and question yourself deeper. Subconsciously, it's plumage. The better your plumage, the more you stand out against your fellow women; and the higher the chance the men will seek you.
Even if you don't think you WANT the men seeking you, you actually do -- at the very least, you want to be seen, or you want to have the APPEARANCE of of being sexually attractive to men; even if you are among women. It's a social grooming thing. Even if there are no men around, a woman still wants to have best plumage of the other women, or at least equal to the other women; and if the other women are sporting a lot of plumage, that's the standard.
As with many things, it comes down to who is the most likely to attract a mate.
@the_last_kiss - Heh, that comment looks familiar
.
@datingish - Shhh. Curious to see if anyone catches on. ;)
@the_last_kiss - This is definitely true, even though some women don't want to admit it...
if and when i go all out, i do it for me. not for the dude. not for the gals. it's for me.
Hm. Once again, I'm an atypical female, I guess .. I'll spend the same time on either outing
hmm...probably social status. haha.
but i don't really make an effort to get all fancy on either :P
I usually do more for guys, but then again, girls are pretty competitive and no one wants to show up looking like they just got out of bed if everyone else is all done up. Plus sometimes it's just fun to get all dressed up. And if she knows you prefer her without makeup, why would she put tons of makeup on for you?
I definitely don't want to look like a hot ghetto mess anywhere I go so I primp for either person, but that's just me, my vanity, and female cliche.
Dude it's a simple answer... Us guys like to show off our cars and what not and be the "Top Dog" of the crowd. Girls show off what they can look like and dress up with and that stuff. They just want to "out do" each other... hahaha... at least that is my understanding from my observations.
I do about the same for going out with guys as I do for girls. Maybe less for the girls actually, cuz they've seen me at my worst already.
I think it's more that guys just won't notice the specifics, so there isn't a point towards putting a lot of effort into it. Looking decent is all that's necessary. :)
Meh you're man has seen you wet from the shower, groggy from waking up & sweaty from... & he is still with you. You have to look good with the girls so they don't talk shit about how unkept you look. Plus, you wanna look hot incase a better looking man comes along.
(Just kidding.)
i like getting more dressed with my friends.
girlfriends tend to appreciate the effort you put into it a little more. a guy will tell you you look beautiful [at least if he's worth it he will!] and that's all very sweet and all.
but girls can exclaim 'wow, did you use a curling iron for your hair? it looks amazing! how did you do it?!' they understand and sympathize more the joys and hardships of "getting all done up."
There's just something about dressing up and going out for a girls night all glammed up and feeling like a top model. Maybe you just don't want to look like the "ugly" friend of the group. Maybe you want to turn a few heads while you're not welded to the arm of your big strong boyfriend... not because you want a new boyfriend, just because it is nice to know that even though you're taken, you're still desirable. Weird? Yes. Truthful? I think so.
I agree with some of the other comments: your boyfriend already accepts you and has seen you in many forms (ugly and beautified), but your girlfriends and strangers haven't seen you ugly and you don't want them to. You don't want to be the ugly girl of the group.
It's competition