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Mr. MacchiatoI am almost exactly four years older than my wife.
Mrs. Macchiato tells me that in Korean culture, it's considered lucky to be exactly four years apart. Any multiple of four will work: 8 years apart is considered lucky too. 12 years apart would be kinda creepy (at my age at least), so I didn't ask about that.
When I first met her, I was 29 and she was 25. If I had been 25 and she was 21... well Mrs. Macchiato says that she would've been out of college, and that it would've been fine. I think it would've been a bit weird but if we got along then, it probably would've been fine.
For me, the best part about being close in age is shared experiences. We can talk about the same cartoons and movies, and I don't have to explain the cultural references. Recently at work, I made a reference to "
That's My Prerogative" by Bobby Brown (1988), and a younger co-worker only knew what I was talking about because Britney Spears remade the song in 2004 (ouch). It was hilarious but also a depressing reminder of my age/mortality/senescence.
I asked Mrs. Macchiato about her preference in boys, and she said she likes 'em older. Her theory is that "girls are more mature than boys" and that she wants "someone I can depend on". I guess older boys are more likely to fit that bill.
Personally, I don't think I could go much younger than four years (for now). If I was older maybe, although I've never been a fan of the "the younger, the better" approach to women. I've heard the theory that men should divide their age by 2 and add 7, and that's the minimum age that is ok. I'm 33, so I am "allowed" to date 24 year olds - that's almost 10 years. I dunno - I guess when I think about it, I don't hugely care about age either way.
Do you have an age preference for your partner? How young (or old) would you go when it comes to dating?
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Comments (114)
My rule: they have to be closer to my age than my son's age. I've gone as far as 11 years young than me. Twice.
I'm not sure what that might say about my maturity level - that I could relate to people that much younger than me.
Figuring out my minimum age would be a good SAT question.
I've dated older than me. Up to four years, but it never seems to work out well. In fact, the term "disaster" frequently comes to mind.
as a Britney fan, I feel obliged to say that her version is so much better than Bobby B's.
I've dated two years older and two younger.
For me if I was dating someone at my current age
I will go up to someone three years older than me and two years younger than me.
I don't, but I seem to be a cougar in the making. Not too bad though, my track record has been diminishing to just months difference now (younger)
I wouldn't date a guy more than a year younger than me. My upper limit probably hovers around four or five years older, but I've never gone beyond two years older. I'm still pretty young, after all.
@Natalia@xanga - nothin' like the original...but dang...I feel old now too.
I seem to go for older guys, though usually only a few years older. I dated someone 8 years older once, but I was more mature than he was! haha. My last boyfriend was 3 years older. It's definitely true that girls are more mature than guys and thus it makes more sense for us to date older men, rather than younger ones.
oh and, @Natalia@xanga - I completely agree. It's one of my favorites of hers.
My wife is actually 6 weeks older than me...but we've been good friends since the day we met.
A friend of mine married his best friend...and she's 16 years old then him (or more, I forget.)
I guess it's a case by case issue...
My current boyfriend is 12 years older than me. Most people think that's too much of a difference, but our close friends (who vary in ages between ours) understand the connection that we have with eachother, despite differences between us. Anyway, I decided a LONG time ago that I would never date a younger guy ever again.
Maybe now I would date someone older 3 years older maximum. Because I'm still very young. lol
But when I'm older, I am verysure that I will have wide range of age differences. haha.
At 19, I have never dated anyone younger, and don't plan to (though theoretically, up to a year younger would be okay).
I generally prefer somewhat older guys. About a year older than me is ideal; I would not date anyone who was more than 3 years older.
Once I get out of college, my age range will probably expand up somewhat.
Edit: I'm actually not 19 for another week yet. Oops, kind of a ditzy thing to forget.
I perfer guys close to my age. As for how young I'll go...a year or two younger. How old is to old? I'd say about 4 or 5 years older.
youngest was my age-- oldest 5 years. My boyfriend is 10 months older than me.
I learned a long time ago that age doesn't matter. It's the connection that is key. When I first met my husband, I was 16 and he was 21, we have a 4 year and 2 month difference. I know it sounds horrible, and to ease everyone's pedophile alarms, he was very uneasy about my age. But we just had THAT connection that you can't deny. I am 21 now, and he is 25 and we have been married for 2 years.
Why does the age difference matter so much?
I've never dated any older or any younger guy, gosh that's funny, well I'm still young :D But my parent's age difference is 15 years, they don't have any problems about it and neither do I. If it's love, it's love.
i've always liked girls that are older than me...
i like how they are more mature and responsible in how they think, i hate girls that act all cute and innocent... doesn't do for me
I want to say age is just a number, but for now, I cannot date any guy who is more than 1 year younger than I. It may be because I have a younger brother, and I'm linking it to dating one of his friends... and to me, that's just wrong. As for older, I can go up to 8 years. Who knows. Maybe one day I'll date one who is 5 years younger or 15 years older? My parents are 10 years apart.
I *think* I would prefer an older man, but I wouldn't rule out younger men. I like the idea of an older man because since my impending divorce, I have figured out a bit more of what I want in life. If they are older, then the odds are the have been there, done that, and will understand where I am coming from.
However, coming from someone who will be 30 in a few days I can say that MOST of the men who have hit on me recently are in the 23-26 range. Unfortunately, the majority of them are just out of college and not established on their own yet, so I am not overly interested in dating them. I am sure a younger guy would be "fun" but in the same sense, I don't want to be anybody's momma either. Meh, maybe it's just the majority of the guys I've MET. HA!
I do think it would be a bit odd to date someone younger than my brother though, he's 26. To be younger than that, the guy would have to be pretty damn special. 10 years would probably be my comfort limit as far as older goes.
my boyfriend is about three years older, and its perfect. he is focused on his future and his career and not on carousing with the boys...the responsibility factor wins him brownie points with me!
I have dated younger guys that were responsible, but I would still prefer older.
My fiance is 7 years older. That formula works perfectly for us... He's also told me that that's as young a girl as he would consider marrying.
Funny you ask this. I was just talking to my boyfriend last night, who invited me on a double date with his brother and his new girlfriend.
He is 29. She is just turned 19. woooah!? I don't think age matters, when you're older. But when you're younger I think it's kind of a big deal. So much changes in a year, or two years at such a young age. I don't think it's a good idea. I would go maybe three older and one younger.
Then again, to counter my own point.. i go to college with a lot of people I relate to intellectually, and assume they are my age... only to later find out that they are five or more years older.
I've never really liked a guy who is younger than me, but I'd go a year younger at most. (I have to agree with the whole maturity thing. Guys seem to be more immature at my age and I've been told that I'm too mature for my age.)
The guy I like is... What, like, nine years older than I am? My only problem is that people would look at us funny... But in a few years? Who knows? I don't think I'd go more than ten years older, though.
I met my future wife when I was 18 and she was 23. Married 2¼ years later. I don't really notice the age difference...although she didn't find out how old I was until my 20th birthday. (Since I graduated college early - bachelor's degree at 19½, she thought I was older. Ha!)
My dad commented to me..."well, she's about five years older than you, guess that means you'll die about the same time" - referencing the longer life expectancy of the ladies.
Better than my grandparents, though. My grandmother found out that she was almost 4 years older than my grandfather...on their wedding day! (She was 27, a widow of the Korean War with two children, he was 23)
I'd def agree with the girls being more mature than guys.. my limit would be 5 years older & 1 year younger.. any younger & it'd def be like I'm dating my sister's friends -- yuck! however, I've never dated anyone younger nor have I ever dated anyone more than a year older than me.. maybe I should [date older]...
i've always dated within a year of my own birthday. there's no particular reasoning for it- i guess going through school, those are the guys you are most likely going to get to know.